LOL - Hilarious things non-horsey people say - Page 2 - The Horse Forum
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post #11 of 436 Old 06-30-2010, 05:44 PM
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 5,289
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"Why are your horses blindfolded? Can they see out of those things?"

However, my pig fat horses spend a lot of time in the spring and fall with fly masks *and* grazing should hear the questions I get about that...just once, I'm going to answer "Oh, THAT horse. He's criminally insane, those are restraints." or "Him? We call him Hannibal Lechter."

All time favorite -

Had a cute true black large pony in my barn for sale, lovely local hunt/show/pony club pony, good first pony. Clueless newbie parents and beginner child come try him early in the fall, in full coat, when he resembles a stuffed animal. Come back a couple of weeks later, after I've clipped him. Pony is gorgeous, sleek, fit, you can actually see his conformation and he is the typical gunmetal matte black of a clipped horse. Parents take one look at pony and give me the dirtiest look in the history of horse dealers and say accusingly "YOU MEAN THAT WASN'T HIS REAL COLOR??????????"
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post #12 of 436 Old 06-30-2010, 05:49 PM
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Georgia
Posts: 1,825
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Oh, forgot one, I was taking out a trail ride and was riding one of the new horses in training in the front of the ride, and when we came across a creek we have to wait for all the horses to get done drinking. Well the horse wasn't thrilled about waiting, so he just did a little jig in place, tossing his head up every now and then. The guy asked, "is he buckin on ya?" then his horse starts dancing because the horse I was riding was, and he goes "WHOAAA now son!! Quit yur buckin!" I didn't tell him the horses weren't bucking.

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Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail...
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post #13 of 436 Old 06-30-2010, 06:03 PM
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: in my stables
Posts: 1,210
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My pony was in a brand new bright blue rug one time and he broke out of his paddock into my garden my cousin saw this and rang me to tell me there was a blue horse running around my gaarden.......................

I told my friend i was going to a competition in France and she asked me will my horse swim over or how will it i get it there like seriously????
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post #14 of 436 Old 06-30-2010, 06:43 PM
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Quad Cities, IL
Posts: 1,775
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How about the people who do a light jog on your horse and then tell everyone they galloped? lol.
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post #15 of 436 Old 06-30-2010, 07:53 PM
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 167
• Horses: 2
I was riding down the road to my barn one day and my mom was driving, and we were passing other barns' pastures, and she looks out the window and sees a paint rolling, and is like, "Oh my God! I've never seen a horse give itself a dust-bath like that before! He's like a hamster!" I was like, "Yeah, mom, that's called rolling." xD

If you're not practicing, someone, somewhere is, and when you meet him, he will win.
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post #16 of 436 Old 06-30-2010, 08:05 PM
Join Date: Jun 2010
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My friend was riding one of the horses I lease. He kicked the horse, who started to trot. My friend fell off and for years asked me, "Remember when Ringo took off on me??"
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post #17 of 436 Old 06-30-2010, 08:37 PM
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Higgins, TX. YeeHaw!!
Posts: 22,258
• Horses: 24
My favorites are the ones who fall off at the trot or the lope and then swear for the rest of eternity that they were "bucked off just like at the rodeo" LOL.

I made the mistake of letting a novice rider get on Dobe one time. I told him that Dobe was very sensitive and you only have to move just the slightest bit to get him to go and whatever you do, DO NOT squeeze with your legs. He says "Yeah, yeah. I've ridden a couple of horses. I know how to do it." Well, he proceeds to get on, clamp down with both legs, and start yanking on Dobe's mouth when he kicked up into a lope. He keeps his legs clamped and keeps yanking and Dobe, poor soul, was so confused that he started crow-hopping and the guy fell off. Needless to say, he got his butt chewed off and he is not welcome to even pet any of my horses now.

Always remember that feeling of looking at a big, open country over the ears of a good horse, seeing a new trail unwind ahead of you, and that ever-spectacular view from the top of the ridge!!! Follow my training blog:
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post #18 of 436 Old 06-30-2010, 11:04 PM
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Indiana
Posts: 1,364
• Horses: 9
When I fell off Summer my uncle told me how he wanted to shoot her "because he wouldnt have any of his animals hurting anyone"

It wasnt her fault..
The saddest part is he grew up riding on a big ranch in Kentucky.
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post #19 of 436 Old 06-30-2010, 11:15 PM
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 508
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Ahaha. I had just fed my horse a carrot and my one friend who was at the barn went to pet him, and I guess he thought she had a carrot, because he lipped at her. You know, where the don't bite, they just kind of search with their lips? Well, she screamed and for the rest of the week she went around school saying how my horse "savagely attacked her." lol.
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post #20 of 436 Old 06-30-2010, 11:53 PM
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Seminole, OK
Posts: 1,854
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My brother is not now, nor has he ever been, a horse person. (Odd, because he married a girl who was very horsey). When he was about 16, he decided to try to ride my cousin's horse. He clambers on - not a pretty sight - and picks up the reins, then says: "Go horsie." The horse just stood there, and my brother asks "Where's the accelerator?"

Guess you just had to be there.
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