My riding instructor/barn owner is downright horrible.

That does happen, but this is a public stable with the horses owned by the BO/instructor. For someone like that it really is all about the money, and leasing on a month-to-month basis means her cash flow would be inconsistent at best.

Dizzy, you're thinking all wrong here. Regardless of what the other stables in your area do, the 3-month lease is what this woman requires.

Sucking up to her and trying to befriend her just to get her to agree to let you lease on a monthly basis makes you no better than her, since you won't really be in it for the friendship, but to get something you want. That attitude really doesn't make me sympathetic to your plight. In fact, it makes me wonder about your ethics and morals.

Why is it not right for her to act as she pleases on her own property, but it's okay for you to be a con artist and try to get what you want out of her by pretending to be her friend?

You don't want suggestions on how to get back into riding and taking enjoyment from it, you want us to tell you how to scam this woman into giving you what you want. That's messed up.

Wow have you got me all wrong. So wrong it's hilarious actually. This is the seond time today i've been judged harshly by someone who doesn't even know me. With an attitude like that take a look at yourself before calling anyone else "messed up".

I want to stay at this barn, keep my horse at this barn, and GET ALONG NICELY WITH EVERYONE. And I never said i'd suck up to her. In fact, i'm sure I just said I don't want to be fighting with her. This is a business and I expect nothing more that a civil business relationship. I'm paying her for a service. Is it so much to ask for her to be CIVIL? I NEVER said I wanted to be her friend. And since I was told by the manager of this business that she does do it on a month to month basis why is it so out of the question for me to look for that??

I don't understand why you went back... are you sure its worth it? Would it be more worth while to pay a little extra and travel a little further to be treated decently?
I can't understand why a person can run a business like that if she is so rude to people.

Dizzy, there are 2 issues here: You disliking her personality, and wanting a month by month lease. The second to me is not really an issue because she has a policy and it's hardly fair to ask her to make exceptions to a new client. Once you are an established client whom she knows she can rely on, maybe she'll be more apt to make an exception.

The first issue is the one that will be a problem from the get go, and you can do something about it. Her personality is what it is, and if it already makes you uneasy, then you need to seriously consider if you could work with her at all. Riding when you're stressed out or unhappy will certainly lead to bad consequences. You are very connected to that horse at that time, and the horse really feels your emotion. Being under stress or becoming stressed throughout the lesson will not end pleasantly. What's the point of riding if there is no enjoyment in it?

This does not sound like it is going to work out well for you. I would seriously look elsewhere. You have to be able to have a good working relationship with your BO/instructor because your animal is in her care, and you are trying to learn from her.

Stand up to her and let her know that you are paying her and you expect certain amount of respect. I would bet that you get along much better with her if you set the ground rules now. Don't wait until your mad to confront her. Do it when you are calm and be civil and nice about it. If that doesn't work fire her and find another barn.

Actually there have been a lot of complaints about her, and a lot of people have stopped going there, simply because of her nasty attitude. They've lost a hell of a lot of business at this point. The manager herself told me this (though I already knew it), and that because of that, it should be a lot easier to have a month to month contract.

Due to a loss in business (a lot of people have left because of her nasty attitude) the manager told me that it's likely that she'd do it on a month to month basis more readily. On top of that, she told me that she does it all the time for her other clients anyway, and the 3 month lease is more of a default, rather than cast iron rule.

As for her personality, it's such an issue that it's costing her more business than just me (which explains her cheap leasing prices). I tried to be friendly but I was just met with insults...and i'm just not used to not getting along with people, for no reason especially. At least the barn that's 45 mins away from me is warm and friendly. I get along with those people like a house on fire, and they do a month by month lease but it's just way more expensive.

Okay, that's just the way she is. I can't imagine trying to suck it up and suffer. If the other barn (while a bit more expensive) is that much better, I'd spend the extra money. It sound like there is just too much drama at the barn you're at now, and who has time for all that? If the extra cost might prevent you from leasing, but you can board and take lessons without the drama, I would do that. Sanity is priceless. Maybe there are other options, like the instructor using your horse for lessons in exchange for using one of his or hers. Just a thought. I know at the farm where I ride, a couple of boarded horses are used for lessons from time to time, and the owner either gets a cut on boarding, or a free lesson in exchange.

Im mot suprised! Anyway the main thing is I wish you luck in resolving this, I don't know the situation fully and if you think the barn and facilities are worth it, then they probably are, she's just one woman! Although, sounds like a very irritating one . Good Luck and have fun with your new lease horse :)

Your first post said nothing about her agreeing to do a monthly lease, only that one of her employees HINTED that she might do it 'if she liked you'.

In fact, you stated that she NORMALLY requires a 3 month lease contract.

That's in your original post, and I can only go by what you put down. If there's a misunderstanding it's obviously because YOU'RE not being clear when you post, not because I or anyone else have a reading comprehension problem.

Apparently it IS too much to ask for this woman to be civil. You knew years ago when you boarded there that she was a shrew, and yet somehow you think she's going to change now because you want her to? That's her MO and personality, and you are not going to change it.

If you're not being treated civilly by someone you're paying for a service, GO SOMEWHERE ELSE WHERE YOU WILL BE. Why is that so hard for you to understand?

The image I'm getting is of someone who sees a less expensive lease than anywhere else, and instead of realizing that the situation is impossible and only going to result in grief and ulcers, expects things to just magically work out.

Yeah, good luck with that.

Oh, and titling your thread, "My riding instructor/barn owner is downright horrible." doesn't put you in the best of light, either.