Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: East Central Illinois
mystykat, my advice is the same. I was rather fearless until my gelding threw me in 2004 and broke my humerous. (In May, so it blew my riding season that year. =/
It has taken me several years to get my confidence back and I take my young gelding's training slowly.
You are feeding fear. IMO, you need to go back over everything you do with your horse until you are really sure he won't do something screwball. It's not 100%, but I can tell you, I owned several finished horses--"Corporal" was a finished horse at 5yo, one year after I bought him--and you can trust them, but young horses need many more hours of training than people may think they do.
I think that Ken McNabb said it best: "Work them _____ until your are so bored and your horse is doing_________SO WELL, that you move on.." (to the next skill.)
THIS will give you back your confidence that has been shaken by your friend's accident.