Raggedy Ann in a Barbie Doll world.... - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 23 Old 04-24-2011, 11:38 AM Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Little Bigtown
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Raggedy Ann in a Barbie Doll world....

There's hay in my bra, my hair's always up in a ponytail, my jeans are filthy. I smell like citronella and sweat, my roots are grown out 6 inches because I'd rather buy tack then get my hair done, I have barn-chore-biceps and callouses to rival a sailor's. Forget getting a mani-pedi; it'd be ruined in no time. My farmer's tan is shocking and I never wear make-up (what's the point? It would be melting off my face in minutes).

DH is a City Boy; works in town with white collar execs all day, out to lunch with classy gals and gents all the time. Comes home to Raggedy Ann....I need a self esteem boost! I know he's proud of what I do running the farm all day and the training I put in with the horses, but I still can't help but feel down sometimes. Help me out, here! Give me some tips or "I feel ya, Honey" feed-back, plz!

If the world was truly a rational place, men would ride sidesaddle.
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post #2 of 23 Old 04-24-2011, 11:51 AM
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Minnesota
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I feel your pain... I work as a farm hand but live in Minneapolis. My SO works in town and my "real job" (desk jockey) is in town. One the occassions that morning chores run too late or emergency fence repairs must be made and I do not get a shower or change of clothes before going to my "real job" I go in hay in my hair sawdust in my shoes and smelling of the sweet smell of horses. The guys don't appreciate it near as much as I do. My SO on the other hand does appreciate it, as he works at the farm 1 or 2 days with me, when I have big projects or just need a hand.

My car is covered in dirt road dust, my trunk is filled with tools, and tack. And there is hay & mud EVERYWHERE!!!

Some days I feel exactly like Raggedy Ann, and sometimes I just remind myself that I am happier now than I have ever been and it doesn't matter what other think because I am happy with who I am and what I do, allthough sometimes I do need that reminder.

Hope it helps to know you are not alone (sorry I got so long winded, sitting at my desk job thinking of horsies got me distracted)
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post #3 of 23 Old 04-24-2011, 01:30 PM
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Detroit, Michigan
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All I can do is sympathize.
I have pretty dresses in my closet, all with tags still attached because I bought them thinking 'Well, this would be nice to wear on an evening out.' Evening out? My BF is lucky if I change from my barn boots to my non poop boots before we go out. Forget the 4 boxes of root dye I have in my linen closet. It's too far gone to do a root touch up, now.
Jewelry? I've got a ton. I don't remember what it looks like.
Thankfully, BF doesn't have a white collar job like your DH, and he's just excited to see me, in any form, when I'm come home from the barn. My horse is the other man, it's true.
I might suggest for you, though, to maybe take a day off(Or a partial day, if you can swing it.) from the barn and use it to surprise DH with your kindness and generosity. Make a dinner, throw on some perfume, take in a movie or go get a drink? Maybe just a little something to remind DH that he hasn't been forgotten.
Although, from what you typed it just seemed to me as if you were having a confidence issue, yourself. Not him.
I'm sure he loves the you that you are and you don't need to worry about all those 'classy' people he has his business meetings with. You say he is proud of you, so he must recognize how hard working, dedicated and strong you are. THOSE are the qualities he sought, after all, that which is YOU, right? The hay in the bra, farmer's tan, oh gods I smell like a barn, you. It's proof of what a hard working girl you are. He should be proud to show you off in all your Raggedy Ann glory!
But, if you still want to do something, for YOU, I'd say take a bit of a day and dedicate it to yourself. I KNOW it's hard to squeeze it in, but, take an hour, two at most. Grab a box of hair dye, a bottle of vitamin E(for yer paws.) and hit a tanning salon: Total cost: $15.00/Time: about 2 hours. Throw on some of your non barn clothes, even if your own personal even IS just running to the store.

Anyhow, even if you can't or don't want to, I must truly admit, I'm right there with you sister. Le Sigh.

He knows when you're happy
He knows when you're comfortable
He knows when you're confident
And he always knows when you have carrots.
~Author Unknown~
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post #4 of 23 Old 04-24-2011, 01:49 PM
Join Date: Mar 2011
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I feel you, girl. I make lots of appearances in class still wearing riding boots and with helmet hair. But for me, it's all worth it when we hit the ring!
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post #5 of 23 Old 04-24-2011, 01:57 PM
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Ontario
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I'm the same. All of my new clothes...that I say aren't going to be barn clothes end up being worn at the barn anyway. Even if it's nice shirts and jeans, they end up being worn at the barn...good thing is they wash up nicely so that's a good save.

I've been thinking of getting nice sandals and dresses but it is a chancy thing cuz I may never actually wear them lol.
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post #6 of 23 Old 04-24-2011, 02:19 PM
Green Broke
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Oregon
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I understand how you feel.

I haven't had my hair trimmed in 6 months,I go places smelling like horse poop or pee and I apologize to ppl and let them know I have horses. I no longer have nice going out shoes besides my wedding heels...I go out to dinner in mucking boots sometimes. I wear baggy clothes,jeans are getting worn out and holy....

I wear makeup still..it's not hot here yet so it stays on,I sometimes put product in my hair.

I only had my nails done once...for prom...I don't do much girly things.When I go shopping it's automatically for tack or feed.

I sometimes feel like a scudge bucket.

How I remind myself is I am lucky to have a horse. I find it a privlege :)
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post #7 of 23 Old 04-24-2011, 02:56 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2010
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Originally Posted by Gidget View Post
How I remind myself is I am lucky to have a horse. I find it a privlege :)
You guys are spot-on. Thanks for reminding me what's important, lol. ;) And I totally think I will take a couple hours off one of these days this week and doll up a tad for a night out with DH.

If the world was truly a rational place, men would ride sidesaddle.
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post #8 of 23 Old 04-24-2011, 03:39 PM
Join Date: Feb 2011
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I understand how you feel. But, living in the city but being a country person, I can see both sides of the fence. I would rather be at the barn, dirty, ANY DAY. I enjoy being dirty and smelling of horses because it shows that I have worked hard, and have gotten to do something some people will not ever do. Some people DREAM of owning a barn and never seeing a Spa day in their lives .

I agree with taking a day off and getting pretty. It feels good to treat yourself to that every once in a while, while at the same time making you appreciate the dirt and grime all the more!
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post #9 of 23 Old 04-24-2011, 04:41 PM
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Minnesota
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I too agree with spending some "you" time. Every couple weeks or so I put on non-barn clothes and go out with the BF for a nicer dinner and maybe something as simple as a walk. Or if his schedule is not cooperating I go out with a friend or 2 and just do something different like a movie, zoo, wander around shops, just whatever sounds fun. It is a nice escape.
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post #10 of 23 Old 04-25-2011, 02:51 AM
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Los Angeles, CA
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Awww, I'm sorry you feel that way :(

My "look" (clothes, makeup, hair, everything) revolves around low maintenance! Maybe pick a hair color that, if it grows out six inches, isn't very noticeable? If you don't like your natural color (aww) you could try a slightly different shade from a box at the store for a lot cheaper, a lot faster, and a lot less work to maintain.

It may also be fun to invest in some pretty headbands to wear with your pony tail if you want to feel more feminine around the barn. Helps keep straggling hairs out of your face too!

I agree with the "me time" suggested by others here too since a lot of what you are self conscious about actually boils down to having the time / energy / justification to pamper yourself.

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