A few years ago, I had a few bad falls and was terrified of cantering. After a while i started up again and continued on to move up a level and start jumping. For a while I was back in the swing of things. I even started riding a really, really fast horse and had a lot of fun with him. I would've normally been scared but now I wasn't.. my confidence was back. Since then, I don't know.. I've just lost it all together. Now I spend all the time in between my lessons freaking out that I'll be put a bad horse and they'll do something bad. It gets to the point where I can't sleep & I'm sick of it. Ways to gain confidence back//stop the nerves?
I think, personally, that I just need a trusting horse that will help me calm down, but my instructor insists on switching it up all the time and sticks me on random horses without my opinion. =\