In my experience, if you don't bond with the horse, it's not going to be a good working relationship between the two of you.
If you want to bond with your own horse, good on ya, but horses don't need to bond in order to form a good working relationship with their rider. All they need is to know who the alpha is in the situation.
I love my horses and have bonded with each of them in different ways, but even if I weren't bonded to them, I'd expect them to behave.
That's where I find the touchy feely, woo-woo crap the more out there NH trainers espouse, to be detrimental to newbies. Oh, you can't ride the horse until you form a special, magickal, emotional bond!!!! It'll take you months and months before you get there, and you need all the DVDs and special tools before you can even consider getting up in that saddle!
Hogwash and balderdash.
OP, at 14 y/o that horse of yours is already trained. There's no reason you can't ride her NOW.