I've been riding for 12 years, and I've owned my horse Dallas for 6 years. He's a really good boy and always does his best for me, but the thing is whenever we have an issue I'm the problem. I have anxiety issues, but this normally doesn't bother me when I'm riding, well it didn't for 11 years. Last November I was riding Dallas outside and it was a cold and windy day. That was fine, not a problem. Well then my neighbors starting shooting off their guns, Dallas wasn't bothered but I started getting nervous that he was going to act up. The final straw was turkeys. The guns scared a bunch of wild turkeys that flew up into the brush right next to Dallas and I. The turkeys scared the crap out of me and Dallas then spooked. I wasn't ready like I should have been and I took a nasty fall. I was in my western saddle and took the horn twice to my stomach when he bucked, then it hit my leg as I fell. I landed flat out on my back and couldn't move for a few minutes. A neighbor caught my horse, and my brother helped me up. I was so sore I couldn't get out of bed for a week. Since then I've still ridden Dallas and showed him successfully, but I've always had these nerves since then. I anticipate there being a problem before there even is any trouble, and it's a self-fulfilling prophecy. I panic over something and Dallas reacts.
I know that this issue is all my fault, not Dallas's. I need to stop getting worried about what might bother him and stay calm. It's hard for me to admit having this issue because before that fall I was always very confident on Dallas. I want to get back to having that confidence and stop causing my horse problems by me getting so nervous. My pony Shaymus is always super calm and a total babysitter even when I'm nervous, but Dallas is really in tune with how I'm feeling and reacts based on it.
Any advice and staying calm and not freaking out over what might bother my horse?