Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Rutherfordton, NC
I do have some confidence and fitness issues which are impeding my progress some. But after 10 minutes I was sweating, out of breath and my legs were on fire! I understand WHY she wanted me to continue to work at a trot - I was fearful and not pushing my horse hard enough to do more than a jog and I was doing all the work.
She typically gets annoyed when she feels that I am not working hard enough or long enough. Last week when I was death gripping her TB mare, I stood up and hunched over the mare's neck - a natural response. She kept yelling at me - SIT DOWN, which was the opposite of what my mind was telling me to do. I just couldn't get my mind around it and finally yelled back "I'M TRYING!!!" To which she replied " NO YOU'RE NOT!" She had be get off the horse - which I was happy to do - then she told me that the mare was a level A show horse and I had NO business owning a horse, etc. Pretty much just scared me further.
Yesterday, we were working on bending our horses necks and the (different) mare I was on was stiff on one side. I felt like I was hurting the horse - as it was something I'd never done before. The horse kept backing up (the mare does western too) and I was having trouble boxing my worry/fear and focusing on what she was doing. My trainer said do what I'm asking or get off my horse - those are your two options. So, I made the horse turn to which she replied sarcastically "See you did it without exploding!"
As we left she said, "This backtalking is going to stop NOW or you're going to leave my barn." Whew, that made me mad! I can handle sarcasm, annoyed trainer, but being talked to like a 12 year old is intolerable! She rode her horse a head of me, obviously pissed. As I was untacking my horse, I just broke down and we had words. I told her that I could not work if we couldn't get along. She replied, "What do you want me to do praise you? Kiss your butt? You DON'T PAY ME ENOUGH!" It was bad. :( I walked away feeling like quitting everything.
Now, I don't mind being picked apart when I'm riding - that's where improvement comes in; I obviously can't see and don't know what I am doing wrong. So trainers are essential in improving my seat.
Equito Ergo Sum
I ride; therefore, I am!