I'm glad that you get to find a new trainer. I had a trainer who happened to be the "big" trainer in the area, and everyone else I talked to recommended her, so I started taking lessons with her when. With my first horse, everything was fine, but when I got my TB mare, everything went downhill. I too am very shy/quiet, so I'm not inclined to "argue" with the trainer. She started pushing my horse a lot, and since she was too heavy to ride my mare, she couldn't quite understand some of my issues and frustrations, so she started making me do whatever worked with the other horses, most of which just made my horse worse. She also spent her lessons yelling, more to be heard than anything else, but yelling none the less. When I got my horse, she was a grand prix jumper, was VERY well behaved, and was a very happy horse. By the time I stopped taking lessons with the trainer, she was not happy jumping, was rushing all the fences, very nervous, would start shaking when I'd give her a bath the day before a show, head up in the air, hard to stop ect. When I would go to shows, and the trainer was there, my horse would freeze, get bug eyed, start shaking, and panicking if she heard the trainers voice. After 6 months of working by myself with her, she was almost back to her old self, but I had lost a lot of my confidence in her, and it showed when I would ride her. I would have loved to find another trainer, but at that point, it was up to me to pay for my own lessons, and I just didn't have the money.