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post #31 of 40 Old 05-27-2011, 11:46 PM
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Some words to live by: It's At You, It's Not About You.

How do you know? Because when you explained where you were coming from, it made no difference. Therefore, it cannot be about *you*. This is some of the trainer's rubbish that's coming up in your area, and may have been triggered by your remark, but it's still the trainer's issue...not yours. Don't take it personally, let it go, move on. Because you can't fix this, and you sure as heck can't spend your life protecting other people from their own demons.
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post #32 of 40 Old 05-28-2011, 07:59 AM
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This thread has me a nervous wreck, LOL. Tomorrow I go to the new barn for the first time. I haven't been able to get over there yet. I'm on disability for an anxiety disorder and I wanted a friend to go the first time with me. Once I even made it all the way to the barn and had the driver keep going. I go through this with every thing new I try to do. But when I'm really nervous I'm almost guaranteed to say something I later regret. Often times the other person doesn't even notice it but I obsess about it, LOL. Like this OP I'm really a friendly, outgoing person once I relax but I rattle on and on when I'm nervous (like now, LOL) I hope I don't have any problems because it's a bigger, fancier barn than I'm used to and I'm not very fancy.
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post #33 of 40 Old 05-28-2011, 02:12 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by morabhobbyhorse View Post
This thread has me a nervous wreck, LOL. Tomorrow I go to the new barn for the first time. I haven't been able to get over there yet. I'm on disability for an anxiety disorder and I wanted a friend to go the first time with me. Once I even made it all the way to the barn and had the driver keep going. I go through this with every thing new I try to do. But when I'm really nervous I'm almost guaranteed to say something I later regret. Often times the other person doesn't even notice it but I obsess about it, LOL. Like this OP I'm really a friendly, outgoing person once I relax but I rattle on and on when I'm nervous (like now, LOL) I hope I don't have any problems because it's a bigger, fancier barn than I'm used to and I'm not very fancy.

Aww, I'm sorry. D=

If it makes you feel better I also am not fancy, going to a fancier showing barn. I have also met some very nice people who are great to talk to. Which funny enough are the arabs owners. It ends up that the trainer DID get the horse for them and is mad they don't want to keep it. The trainer said it was all the little girls fault =0 Instead they offered for me to work with him, or keep him. Lol. Anyhow.

Don't be worried, there are always nice and not so nice people at stables. Its hard moving as always, but you should make friends. Good luck on the move!
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post #34 of 40 Old 05-28-2011, 02:27 PM
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Oh honey, wasn't your fault, everything makes me nervous And then I feel guilty on top of it which makes it worse. I hope you take them up off their offer, to keep him if you can afford it, or if not, help them train him. But I wouldn't think a high spirited horse like was a good choice for a little girl anyway and the trainer should have known better. Thanks for the encouragement. Cheryl
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post #35 of 40 Old 05-28-2011, 03:40 PM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by morabhobbyhorse View Post
Oh honey, wasn't your fault, everything makes me nervous And then I feel guilty on top of it which makes it worse. I hope you take them up off their offer, to keep him if you can afford it, or if not, help them train him. But I wouldn't think a high spirited horse like was a good choice for a little girl anyway and the trainer should have known better. Thanks for the encouragement. Cheryl
Wish I could, he's a beautiful bay paint/arabian and around 16 hands, small conformational flaws but he's still growing and hasn't filled out yet. Perfect for what I'm wanting in another horse. But I'm a year or two out (when ever I have to retire Jake to his big pasture) before I can get another one. One is enough on my wallet. These opportunities always come around when I can't take them. But I'm going to work with him some as long as I'm not stepping on the other trainers toes......
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post #36 of 40 Old 05-28-2011, 03:54 PM
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I tend to be a little touchy when people make stereotypical comments about Arabs, just because I get sick and tired of people perpetuating this idea that Arabs are nutjobs. I probably would have been annoyed by the comment about having an "Arab brain" but I certainly wouldn't have lashed out over it. People have their own opinions, and I'm more likely to discuss it with someone and try to understand WHY they think that way.

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I hope God tells her to smash her computer with a sledgehammer.

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post #37 of 40 Old 05-29-2011, 03:52 PM
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I know what you mean Horsesdon'tlie

I WENT to see Sienna today and it was awesome. A friend went with me to help make me go and the barn was almost totally empty because they kick off their annual events on Memorial Day Weekend. Everyone was at the ranch except for maybe 5-6 people.
I was upset about the place the barn manager told me I could put my tack but that was within the first few minutes where I was still wound up about going. By the time I went to the pasture to get her, she immediately calmed me down. She started to walk off, but I turned sidewards and she stopped. I gave her wither a good scritch before I changed her into the rope halter. When I took her out of the pasture full of mares, she immediately started eating grass (she's a 24/7 eater, LOL, was eating the leftover hay from this morning when I went in) and my friend brought her some baby carrots but didn't want to feed her one, was nervous. I don't give her any treats anymore cause she gets pushy so my friend who is afraid of horses and has seen how 'Arab' Sienna can act gave her one. It was so hot we moved over under a tree so I could mosey her, just let her wander and eat nice, crispy wet grass. When we moved away from the herd she started circling, snatch a mouthful, then circle, but she calmed down in a couple minutes. So Patti and I talked, she was holding my service dog for me, and Sienna and I moseyed from tree to tree for grass. I spent the time scratching her itchy places, and checking out her couple 'hairless' places where she tried to be alpha and got bit for her trouble, LOL. None of them were open or anything, just missing hair. All her winter coat was gone just from this month, and she's all shinny and dappled again. I have a feeling we'll be doing a few more moseying trips before I make her work. That's how we built our first bond and it's never been broken, tested LOL, but never broken. It was a perfect first visit.
I was so pleased by your answer about the paint. I talked to Patti about that very thing coming home. A lot of people like you would just get rid of Jake and 'move up.' I have never understood this in the horse world. people say, 'QUIT treating them like a pet dog and get their respect.' Well if your dog doesn't respect and mind you, you're just going to have a smaller monster on your hands. Could you imagine if people traded their dogs like horses, 'oh that one's younger, bigger, prettier, more in style, etc.' other people would be horrified. My biggest concern is Sienna is probably going to outlive me, and I'll have her put down before I take a chance on someone else not treating her with respect and love. And I'll be there to do the injection myself, unless something unforeseen happens so her last memory isn't of a vet. But fortunately that's years away for both if us, I hope.
Oh and if anyone can understand the drain on a wallet i can. I'm on SSDI and it's not easy to keep a horse on that. I tried to get a rescue PMU yearling and they said I didn't have enough money to keep a horse. Well 3 years later I still Have Sienna, fat, sassy, and healthy!!!! You make your choices on how to spend your money and what you can live without. Good luck with your training project. Cheryl
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post #38 of 40 Old 05-29-2011, 06:37 PM
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WOW....Why do people have to be SO Weird??? I mean, I dont care for Arabians myself, but we all have, and are entitled to our own opinions. I dont think what you said sounded bad at all! Like someone above said, I would probably have laughed about it with you!! Has anyone else noticed though that people do seem more easliy offended these days? I mean c'mon...get a darn sense of humor, will ya??? If you dont want to interact with people (clearly she didnt really want to) then dont talk to the rest of us. You didnt start the conversation, SHE DID. Blow it off, whatever. You have to laugh to yourself a little; she obviously felt somehow slighted as her horse misbehaved at exactly the right moment and she felt foolish I am guessing. Maybe things will get off on a better foot later and you could end up being good friends...yeah, or not.

"If you talk to the animals they will talk with you and you will know each other. If you do not talk to them you will not know them and what you do not know, you will fear. What one fears, one destroys." - Chief Dan George
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post #39 of 40 Old 05-30-2011, 03:26 AM Thread Starter
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Morabhobbyhorse - Glad to hear you visit went good.

I made a kids promised Jake that he wouldn't have another owner...ever. He went through so many (at least four in 5 years, before we got him). I've been glad that I've been able to keep it. I already have it set up that he will return to my fathers ranch when his body is no longer able to keep up with his head. Lol I know he will run himself into the ground for me before he will slow down. So I am ready for him to have an earlier retirement than most, so he doesn't break down. That horse has so little concern for his own health and injuries. I have to constantly keep physical checkups on his body because he won't act out if his back is hurting, a limp at a trot on the ground that becomes non existent under saddle....Makes me a little frazzled.

jdw - I don't know. I guess I never understood how slighted arabians are. o.0 I've always seen them do very successful around me in gymkhanas, jumpers, trails and more. I find a challenge when people tell me 'you can't with that horse'.....'too crazy' and so on. I take it on and beat it and love showing that we can overcome what people think we can't.
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post #40 of 40 Old 05-30-2011, 09:13 AM
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I understand about Jake. and understand about about Jwd. I Think people are so busy anymore they don't take the time to really relax which to me horse and relax = the same thing. I've heard the same thing about Appys and they are a 'color' not a breed per se, so can have any kind of nice, gentle background. And paints, and TBs. A girl at my other barn had a rescued TB, and I remember a year ago Easter me being out there trying to put together candy to hide for the kids, and she was sitting in a chair next to me right outside the barn with her mare, turned butt toward her, combing her tail while the mare just stood there occasionally nibbling the grass, lead rope on the ground. I have my favorite types of horses, but I TRY, not sure I always do, not to assume a horse is going to be a certain thing. Stereotypes have certain grains of truths in them which is why they perpetuate, but they have a lot MORE grains of untruths in them.
Jake is a very lucky horse!!!!!

Last edited by morabhobbyhorse; 05-30-2011 at 09:16 AM. Reason: mistaken OP
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