Huh. I am wondering what I am missing
To the posters before me, I am sort of shocked. I read the OP's post and didn't think she was being spoiled or pissy about riding. I heard two messages in her post.
1. She wants to progress but others are holding her back.
2. Her family sets expectations that she must win at all costs.
Here are my responses to the OP.
In regards to #1, sometimes we think we are ready but we are over inflating our own egos. It is always good to have a person who can ground us and keep us on track. What was not in your post is what are YOUR goals for you? Why do you ride? Please state your general age in school years? Are you a high school student? Middle school? Where do you think this will take you? The Olympics? A career? How does what you are doing today fit in with how you vision your future?
How you truthfully answer those questions will shed some enlightment on your frustration with your coach and parents. If this is something you are doing for the here and now, and not striving to have an adult competitive career, I can understand why you may be impatient and willing to accept a bar or two when you don't place.
My experience has taught me that the more competitive a person is, along with how the competitive activities supports them, the more patient the person is to achieve greatness.
Which brings us to #2. I am surprised at the disdain and criticism you have received. Obviously the previous posters were not overly pushed by their parents to achieve an adult's expectation of acceptable. And I can tell you, It stinks.
Whether they pay the bills or not, this is about you. Not them. Just because they can afford to put you in the saddle, or they are willing to make the sacrifices so you can, they have no morale or ethical right to set expectations for your success.
It is one thing to say, "I can tell you are not interested in this, so we need to stop due to costs.' That is fair. I have said that to my family. I won't pay out good money for something I have to drag a kid kicking and screaming to and never practice.
But to say, "you love this but are not good enough to afford it" or worse, "i am paying for this so you must meet my expecations" well, that is lousy parenting.
Answer the questions to the statement above. If your heart is truly in it for the competition and future, take the advice of your coach. Be patient. Work the basics and conquer them.
But, if you are in it for the fun and pleasure, and your parents have greater expectations, you better have a heart to heart. Even if you have to involve a school counselor.
Some of my most messed up adult friends were once children who didn't meet family expecations in little league, soccer, hockey or ice skating. They spent their entire childhood on the road only to receive "should have done better." Today, they don't participate in those activities at all.
Last edited by AQHSam; 06-12-2012 at 01:57 PM.