I can practice bending at the hip (I try to think of sticking my butt out behind me so that I don't feel the need to stand in the saddle lol)...I'm slowly starting to get into a better form over the fences and I'm SO excited about the stability it creates!
Good for you! I am so pleased to hear about your light bulb moment! Be proud of yourself!
I think my issue with standing stemmed from when I was first learning to jump and my trainer would have me 2 pt all the way to the jump...so when she jumped, I always felt the need to stand up and "jump for her" for some reason.
This is one of the issues I have with Coaches permitting students to go over fences before they should be. While I get the idea of riding 2 point for beginner riders to not interfear with their horses because they are not stable enough to use their seat - I dislike it because it creates just as you said.
Jumping ahead, unstabillity, perching, unfunctional riding
I would personally rather see a coach put their students on the lunge line for months before they are given the reins. Working on stabalizing their lower leg at that girth, their seat and fluidity of it, and their upper body - going over trot poes and cavaletti's.
Then, when the rider learns to feel their horses rhythm, and remain with their horses movement with a functional and solid seat, lower leg and upper body - then give them the reins.
Not many figure it out as quickly as you did. Many, believe it or not - remain in 2 point throughout their riding life....which may work for some horses and in stadium, but this does NOT work for CC. No if's, and's or but's about it - you must have a fluid functional seat out on CC. You cannot ride a CC fence the same way you ride a stadium - especially when you are on a green horse such as yours.
I'm glad you figured it out on your own - you are steps ahead of riders who have been riding for years, so give yourself a pat on the back.
You are right about pushing your toosh back - exactly what you want to do. As Dorothy Crowell says "Push your toosh back and Ta Ta's out" - you'll figure it out on your own and over time.
And I can totally see why we refused that jump during the first show, if I jumped ahead AND stood up the way I used to...to her, combined with the "scary" look of the jump, I was probably giving her cues to stop when I didn't mean to! So I take full blame for that disaster...it was all me in that case! She was scared of the jump, but from more recent refusals that she ended up jumping anyway, I know had I had a more secure seat and waited for her to jump, she would have gone over that jump after just a slight hesitation
For this, I stand up and applaude. I am so proud of you for taking the responsibillity for your error. As Ian Millar said "A good rider blames themselves and a poor rider blames their horse"
I tried to tell you that in the vids you posted and I know it doesn't sink in always when you hear the words, you have to experience it for it to make sense. I am the same ways - I am a hands on learner. I have to do it to figure it out.
I am super happy for you! You have made a giant step forward in your riding - keep it up :)