George & The Tow-Truck Driver
I had the day off, so I figured on hauling the poop trailer out to unload it. With all the rain of late, the yard is ankle deep in mud everywhere, and the spot where the trailer's parked is deeper yet. I've kept the load tarped, but discovered that the tarp was almost eaten through from the bacteria in the load. Hence, the whole load was completely soaked & weighed triple what it usually does. I tried to pull it out anyway, but it sank completely to the frame in 2 seconds flat.
Out with the wheelbarrow & start shoveling ...
2 & 1/2 hours later I had half the trailer unloaded & spread out in the far paddock. Tried pulling the trailer out again ... uh-uh. More shoveling.
An hour later there was less than 1/4 load in the trailer (which still probably weighed more than a full load if the tarp hadn't leaked), still couldn't budge the trailer. I gave up & called a tow truck. While I waited I figured I may as well continue emptying the trailer. Only took another 20 or 30 wheelbarrow loads anyway ...
By time the tow truck showed up ( 2 hours later), the trailer was empty, I was soaked, there was more mud & goo in that yard than I've ever seen, and I was somewhat less than my usual sunny self.
The driver announced straight away that he only took cash for farm calls, and asked me how money I had on me. I suppressed the urge to pinch his head off, and instead pulled a small wad of drenched 20's from my jeans. He looked as though I'd peed on them, and looked around as though he were searching for some other excuse. When he finally got out of his truck & walked to where the pickup & trailer were, he scoffed & said that his truck wouldn't pull "that much weight". I calmly showed him there was nothing in the trailer anymore, and assured him the combined weight of the truck & trailer was les than his tow truck (BIG tow truck, lots of chrome). He still refused, saying that had he known I wanted him to "crawl around in the mud" he would have refused the call. By the way, the entire pickup is still sitting on solid ground, but with the trailer mired in the mud all I did was spin trying to move. I told the driver all I needed was to get winched a mere 2 feet; with the $75 callout I figured that worked out to about $3 an inch.
After another 15 minutes of arguing I finally lost it. I yelled at this idiot to get his butt back in his truck & leave before I tossed him over the fence. Suddenly he decides that just refusing to do his friggin' job wasn't enough, now he decided to make the leap from lazy lout to flaming idiot.
He started making faces at me and generally acting like a kid. If he was trying to make me go over the edge, it worked. I screamed at him to go, leave, take off, beat it. All he did was laugh, then stuck out his hand & demand his $75. I finally told him to leave or I was calling the cops to have him removed. He raised his hands in a sort of mock gesture & laughed "Oooh, la-de-da! Big tough guy, eh?" Just about the time I began to think "This can't be happening, it has to be a bad dream", I realised he was backing towards the gate of the front paddock where George & Kooter stood mesmerized by all the yelling.
Somewhere in George's DNA must lay an enzyme that signals the adrenalin dam in him. When that call comes in, nothing in George's way is safe. That tow truck driver was in George's way; he was also within reach. As the driver waved his hands, he took one more step backward towards the gate. We already know how protective George can be, and what a sensitive soul he is. I guess he put 2 & 2 together, figured this guy was the reason I was so upset, and now he was in a spot that George could "help". All of a sudden George lunged forward with his mouth wide open & ears pinned against his neck and connected on the driver's right shoulder hard enough to drop the guy to the ground. He started to yelp & scrambled a good 20 feet across the ground on his hands & knees trying to get away from what, he hadn't a clue. When he discovered it was a horse that bit him, his eyes almost bugged out of his head. "That thing BIT me!" he screamed. "Yeah" I said, "and if you ain't gone soon I'm going to let him outta there!" You've never seen anyone get gone so fast!
So George got a real big neck rub, a cookie & an apple. Yeah, I know I shouldn't reward him for biting someone, but I swear that horse knew exactly what he was doing. Whether he figured he was defending me, or what, I'm not sure. I figured he'd be a handful to settle down after, but he just stood there with a sly look ... as if to say "****, I'm good!"
****, I love that horse