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post #1 of 5 Old 06-14-2013, 04:21 PM Thread Starter
Foal
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
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nightmare

Chapter 1

Sophie pulled the saddle onto willows back her little spirited Thoroughbred. Just that moment a shiny ford came up the road and out stepped out. Amy rover who had long blonde hair and wore shiny black jodhpurs and a nice pink top with diamonds on it the next one to step out was Samantha Davis..
should I continue
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post #2 of 5 Old 06-14-2013, 06:16 PM
Yearling
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Minnesota, USA, Planet Earth
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sure, why not? Go for it!

Pshh....I don't procrastinate, I just do unimportant things VERY productively!

Be a frootloop in a cheerio world!
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post #3 of 5 Old 06-14-2013, 06:53 PM
Weanling
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
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?? Your first sentence doesn't make sense???
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post #4 of 5 Old 06-14-2013, 07:58 PM Thread Starter
Foal
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
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Yeah never duble checked it ChristineNJ and ill add more tomorrow.
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post #5 of 5 Old 07-06-2013, 12:35 PM
Weanling
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Gainesville Florida
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Remember to put periods in appropriate places. You really should double check, I had to reread it several times to understand it. Sorry if I'm a little blunt, just trying to be helpful. Remember to also capitalize titles and names. Willow, Rover and Nightmare all need to be capitalized:)
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