The salty sea air that blew through my waist-length dark brown hair stung my eyes in a way that made me smile. The smell of ocean air and horses churn through the breeze. My toes wiggle in the wet sand as I wait for the tide to come crashing in over my ankles. Warm and soothing. Back and forth, the waves come rushing in, only to be pulled back by an invisible force.* The last small arms of the water reach out as if they are trying to adhere to the sand. Slowly though, they too will be yanked back into the abyss only to be flung back onto the shore again. This cycle reminds me of my own life before I came here. My life back on the mainland was full of me trying so hard to be happy, but then I realized, I would never be happy if I spent my whole life looking for happiness. I would have to live life for life! Happiness would come in time. I wish I would have realized this a year ago. I would finally make it to a place I wanted to be, then I would be pulled back into my bedroom. Depression would take its hold on me and suck me into the abyss of my mind, into a place where I never wanted to go. As soon as I got the opportunity to intern for a small horse-back riding tourism business in Kauai, I jumped at the chance. I was at my breaking point and was willing to try anything in order to feel better.********* *******************************
Waiting and worrying, I was sitting in my bedroom, checking my Facebook on my laptop when I got the call. I had applied for the intern-ship a few days before and was praying that I would get my break. Working 6 days a week at the local used bookstore was not rewarding or fulfilling. My small college savings that I had in my bank account had long since run out. My life seemed over before it had even begun. Nothing to do. Nothing to live for.* I was making enough money to pay for rent and food, but not enough to continue to pay for school. My parents had both decided to travel around Europe after I had turned 18 a couple years ago. I was alone with my depression and my cat Leo. I was worried that “crazy cat lady” syndrome would set in if I didn’t turn my life around.
“Hello, my name is Jeremy Chance. You applied for the internship at Manawa Riding Center a few days ago. I am calling to let you know that you got the job. We can fly you to the island as soon as possible. Please email my assistant, Lisa, with the date that works the best for you. She will fill you in on the details.”*Click.*His phone hangs up, mine falls from my hands.