The Real Me. - New Story.

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The Real Me. - New Story.

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    07-15-2011, 04:41 AM
The Real Me. - New Story.

They didn't know who I really was, they called me names and pushed me to the ground. The ugly one, the screw up, the one who they could push around and get away with it, that was me and I hated it.

School was one of the hardest things I have to endure in my day, I wake up in the morning just to get laughed at, sure they weren't physically laughing at me, but the eyes are the window to the soul, and they told me everything. I had no friends, well not any human friends anyway, all I had was my horse - and really that's what has kept me going all these pain filled years.

The first time I saw a real living breathing horse was in a movie when I was just 2years old; I don't remember the title of the movie, or even the concept to the story - but I do remember glaring at the screen waiting to be taken away forever on that beautiful horse. The first time I saw a real life horse was visiting a friends farm, and being in the presense awe strucked me - I was in love with the power, strength and freedom that came with such an animal.

My parents brought me my first horse 4years ago, I was and still am inlove with him. Every day after school, after all the torture and the mocking I go to the stables and put my heart on my sleeve and ride. I never opened up to anything in my life like horse riding - I enjoyed it, and I admit I think im pretty good at it as well.


More to come as soon as I think of what happens next. (:

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    07-16-2011, 08:07 AM
I was sitting in the paddock wiping away the tears that had stained my mud stricken face. I was over all the torment and the way people treated me, but I could never find the courage to stand up for myself. All I had was the support of my family and Hero my beautiful warmblood gelding.

Hero was the apple of my eye, he was beautiful in so many ways it made me cringle. He could make a whole crowd of people stop and watch him as he pranced around the show ring. He was a big horse, standing at 16.2h but he was a giant teddy bear whom I trusted with my life.

I felt a whole lot of grass go into my lap, I looked up and laughed as Hero was looking at me with his big brown trusting eyes, like he was saying here eat this, it's happiness food.
'Hey boy, i'm alright, its just those silly girls at school, one day they'll see the real me" I whispered into his ears.
    07-16-2011, 08:25 AM
You should write a book! You are a very good writer, I can tell even with what little you have writen above! :)
And if this is based off of your life, it is easy for so many people to say don't let the little girl drama bother you but yet no matter how much you do or don't care what they think it still hurts! People can be so very cruel sometimes.

I had major trust issues growing up, I always kept up walls with people, never letting anyone get too close. I was, and still am a little bit of a man hater! I mean I just think they are all POS's and they will do and say just about anything to get what they want and it just blows my mind. Not until a year ago did I finally meet a guy that was worth my time and boy did he have to work for it! :) I fought how I felt about him so very lng and hard and the poor thing was so confused! :) He is the love of my life and my best friend - soon the be married :) but I have never had a friend like him! Never have I even clicked with one of my girl friends like I do with him. I have my friends and they are like family to me but there are so many selfish self absorbed people out there that it is very hard to find those good friends with out being let down over and over again, and when your young people can be soooooo mean! If you do not fit the mold just right your looked as an out cast. I was luckier then a lot of people I always got along with everyone and never fit in a "click" I was more like a floater I was friends with everyone in a way I did not get a lot of the teasing that I witnessed but I also never took the tease - at me or at others. The worst thing to do is to react to them though, that is what they want, for you to make a scene so they can get more attention. I always found it funny how girls did that, called other girls out in front of everyone all like "OMG I heard you said something about me" :0 haha it always made me laugh so then they would just end up looking crazy! Just laugh it off, ride it off, and in time it will all end and in the end it will not have even been worth the tears and the hurt.
    07-16-2011, 10:54 AM
Thank you so much for your feedback.

I was bullied a little bit, so I guess some of this is based on real life events, although now I am very happy; I no longer live for the judgement of others, and have amazing friends, and family. (:
    07-17-2011, 12:07 AM
I felt a whole lot of grass go into my lap, I looked up and laughed as Hero was looking at me with his big brown trusting eyes, like he was saying here eat this, it's happiness food.
'Hey boy, i'm alright, its just those silly girls at school, one day they'll see the real me" I whispered into his ears.

I layed down on the floor in the paddock, and looked up into the bright blue shades of the sky. The sun was still high above, and the birds were tweeting intune with my emotions, I closed my eyes and felt happiness flush out all my fears and worries. It was school holidays soon, I could just focus on Hero and the annual festival that featured many riders from across the towns to come and compete for that big blue sash, and that $500 cash prize.
    07-27-2011, 07:35 PM
Green Broke
Aww awesome! Keep writing, I wanna keep reading it ;)
    07-30-2011, 05:00 AM
It was school holidays soon, I could just focus on Hero and the annual festival that featured many riders from across the towns to come and compete for that big blue sash, and that $500 cash prize.

Mum picked me up from the stables in the old rusted ford and our favourite song came on the radio. 'I can be your hero baby, I can kiss away the pain ohhh yeaaaah'
I smiled as she sung the words and swayed along with the music. Mum was my bestfriend and I could tell her everything. She knew of my battles, my fears but most of all my dreams and ambitions. I trusted her to keep me safe in a world with no boundries and she did.

Dad died a year after we brought Hero, that was probably my breaking point. I don't know why he was taken from the world or what he did to derserve the pain; but nothing could stop the brain tumor growing, and nothing could be done to save him. I wished every night leading up to his death that a miracle would happen, but nothing..

Home life was perfect well for me; we lived in a cottage house, surrounded by a white picket fence. I loved living there, it was perfect for the both of us. My room was my favourite part of the house, my bed showcased my stuffed teddies I had collected from the year dot, my champion ribbions filled up the walls and the view from my window compliemented the farmers lush green paddocks, that were dotted with horses.

I had one day left of school, and when the holidays started I wanted to make a big change in my social life, starting with the annual show.
    07-30-2011, 09:49 PM
:) :) keep going!!
    07-31-2011, 12:01 AM
I woke up to the sound of my buzzing alarm and groaned, my bed was so warm and it felt like I had only just drifted of to sleep. I pulled my covers over my head hoping that mum wouldn't make me go to school - no such luck. Right on que she walked into my room, opening my blinds and letting the sun's rays fill my room with warmth and light, she then sat on my bed, and pulled the covers off me.
'Rise and shineeeeeee' she sang brightly.
I often wondered how she could be so happy all the time, there was never a day where she wasn't happy, well except the days leading up to days death, and 5months after.
'Fiive more minutes' I groaned hoping she was going to be extra nice.
'Nope, that's five more minutes that could make you late, breakfast is on the table and it's your favourite, blueberry muffins with apple juice on the side'

I groaned and stumbled out of bed, the smell of the muffins was just to great to ignore, and I rushed into the kitchen with mum following behind me. I munched on the muffins, and looked at the time, I only had 30minutes to get ready for the bus.

My morning routine went the same everymorning; iron my clothes, put them on, brush my hair and style it, cleanse my face, brush my teeth and last but not least run out the door with a hug and kiss to mum just in time for the bus.

Bus time was the only time where I really enjoyed the school part of life; my ipod came with me every morning, and helped me shut out the world. The bus took 15minutes to get from my house to school, and that was 15minutes of peace that I loved every morning.
    08-01-2011, 01:54 AM
Aw I really like it!! Keep it coming!!

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