Untitled book - need opinions/advice...
 
 

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Untitled book - need opinions/advice...

This is a discussion on Untitled book - need opinions/advice... within the Horse Stories and Poems forums, part of the Horse Pictures, Videos, Artwork, and Contests category

     
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        07-23-2008, 04:25 PM
      #1
    Super Moderator
    Untitled book - need opinions/advice...

    A cool summer breeze filled the air Saturday morning; Jordan Davis pulled on a pair of white socks and running shoes. She had decided to go for a jog this morning, although she really didn’t have time. It was almost five a.m. And the horses needed to be fed and watered, not to mention the fact that stalls had to be cleaned before lessons were to begin at ten. Today Jordan didn’t care. It had been a hard week; she had been overbooked in extra lessons for the regulars. The summer camp children had turned out to be an obnoxious bunch from a local private school; the only good that had come out of that was the fact that they had already taken several lessons and were passed the lead line stage. At least this year she would be able to put a dent in some bills.
    She grabbed a hair band and pulled her shoulder-length strawberry blonde hair into a pony-tale, fiddled with her bangs for a second and turned to view herself in the full-length mirror. She wore a pair of royal blue spandex running shorts that had a neon green stripe down the side and a matching sports bra. She grinned at herself as she fit a baseball cap onto her head. All this trouble to run a few miles, like she’s actually going to impress somebody. She turned and made her way down the wooden staircase of the old farmhouse she had made into her home. She sat on the living room floor and stretched her tanned legs. The sun had just begun to rise when she set out towards the park. Her small riding stables covered one hundred and fifty acres, most of which was wooded, the park actually ran along side of the Clover leaf stables and if she followed the outside edges of the park, her run would equal nearly 3 miles.
    Twenty-five minutes into her jog, Jordan neared the playing fields. She slowed to a walk as she watched a group of men playfully taunt each other while playing a friendly game of softball. After a few minutes she took a seat on the damp grass near first base. She smiled as a handsome man in his late twenties slammed the ball into the outfields. She laughed as he raced around the field, stopping at each base just long enough to clown around with the basemen before darting off to the next base. He stopped halfway to home plate to pick a daisy. He then skipped towards the base holding his hands in a loose fashion, realizing almost too late that the ball was now in the hands of the second basemen. He raced ahead and slid safely home, bringing the catcher down on top of him. He scrambled to his feet and blew dust from the wilted flower that he still held and offered it to the large man in the protective gear.
    The catcher threw off his mask and chased this obnoxious player across the field. Jordan soon realized that she was in the path and leaped to her feet. She tried to dodge him but he was looking over his shoulder at his pursuer and hadn’t noticed her.
    “Stop!” She screamed as she covered her head. It was too late. Jordan squeezed her eyes shut as they all tumbled to the wet grass. Amazingly the ball player had some how managed to avoid landing on her with his full weight. He was standing and yanking her to her feet before she ever opened her eyes. He held her gently by the elbow, she placed a hand on his sweat dampened T-shirt to steady herself. He was staring at her, concern clouding his dark eyes.
    “Are you ok? I’m really sorry, I was goofing off, I…” He shook his head, looking a little embarrassed.
    “I’m fine, really.” She finally answered realizing that she still had her hand resting on his chest. She could feel the rise and fall of each breath. She was surprised he wasn’t a little more out of breath after all that running around. She pulled away and gazed at him, taking in his full height, he stood about six foot two. His muscles weren’t bulging but they were solid and well defined. His skin was lightly tanned by the summer and he had dark hair that was neatly cut, not short enough to look pretentious, but just long enough to add a boyish quality to his rugged features. Jordan felt butterflies in her stomach as she took in his deep brown eyes. She’d never seen eyes quite like them before, they had little amber colored flecks and they sort of reminded her of a puppy dog the way they sparkled when he smiled.
    “Do you need me to take you home or anything?” He asked.
    “No.” Yes. Take me to bed. Where did that thought come from? She giggled. “I just live over there.” She thrust her chin in the direction of Cloverleaf stables and started walking in that direction. “I need to get back. Enjoy your game boys.” She called over her shoulders as she picked up a jog. Wow. She thought, he had to be married, she should have looked at his left finger. Where did that thought come from? She stole a glance over her shoulder and bit her lower lip as she held back a smile. He was limping. He held onto that giant of a catcher as he limped towards the field. He had been concerned about her well being while he was hurt himself. He had to be married. Some girl had to be in love with that man.
         
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        07-23-2008, 04:30 PM
      #2
    Super Moderator
    A big fluffy, yellow dog bounded towards her as Jordan walked up the gravel road that led to the barn and then her house. She stopped in her tracks. She wasn’t afraid of dogs but she didn’t trust strange animals either. This dog however wagged it’s tail excitedly and was carrying a green Frisbee. He had one ear that flopped forward while the other stood straight. She knelt down to pet the dog. She fondled his ears and took the tag from his collar. DISPATCH. Was all it said. The dog placed the slightly chewed Frisbee in her lap. She tossed it towards the house and clapped when he leaped to catch it in mid air.
    “I see you’ve met Dispatch.” Allison Harway called from the entrance of the barn. She stood with a pitchfork in her hand.
    Jordan grinned at the sight of her best friend. She wore a pair of oversized overalls, most likely to protect her pale freckle covered knees from burning. She had her unruly red curls pulled back with a piece of bailing twine and she had a bit too much sunscreen on her nose.
    “Did you trade Riley for a dog?” She asked, referring to Allies husband of two-years. He was a very well known lawyer, who worked just a little to hard and loved his wife dearly.
    “If I did that, I couldn’t afford to work here now could I?” She asked as she tossed the Frisbee for Dispatch. “He just showed up about a half an hour ago, You’d think if the owner was going to spend the money to have his name engraved on a tag, they’d at least add a phone number.”
    Jordan laughed. Allison was the reason she owned this place. She had given her the down payment and helped pay the first few months mortgage, under the condition that she could quit her job as an accountant and be a full partner. Jordan had gladly agreed, noting that she would save a lot of money by not hiring a private accountant.
    She grabbed a pair of sweat pants from the wooden locker area and slipped them over her tennis shoes.
    “I saw the most amazing man today.” She grabbed a pitchfork and began to clean a large stall. “His eyes were so wonderful. The prettiest shade of brown I’ve ever seen, almost black.” She added filling a wheel barrel with manure.
    Allison untangled a hose and stretched it across the aisle as she went from stall to stall filling water buckets.
    “You actually thought some guy was worth looking at? Who is he? What does he do?” She replied yanking on the hose. It was stuck under the wheelbarrow.
    Jordan laughed. What did he do? Who was he?
    “I don’t know, His name is probably something really normal like… Bob or Joe and I’ll bet he works at some construction sight, lifting heavy boards all day. I’m sure I’d have noticed him before if he was from around here.” She sighed wistfully and continued to clean stalls, Ally laughed as she rolled up the hose.
    “Construction worker, eh? Does he have a nice dark tan and great big muscles, ooh, I bet he’s got a tight little butt. Why didn’t you talk to him Jordo?” Her light brown eyes sparkled as she tried to picture a man in tight blue jeans and a cut off flannel wearing a hard hat and holding a sledgehammer with sweat glistening all over his body.
    “I did talk to him.” Jordan grinned, mischievously. It wouldn’t hurt to let Ally get just a little bit curious. She was always so easily excited.
    “You did!” She squealed. “Ha! Maybe now I won’t have to worry about you growing old and grumpy from lack of sex.” She raised her eyebrows up and down.
    Jordan shook her head. Allison had been trying to marry her best friend off since they were twelve years old. She was forever introducing her to eligible bachelors and begging her to date them. The problem was Jordan didn’t want simple companionship, she wanted that old-time kind of romance, the kind of love that songwriters wrote about. How often did that come along?
    “I talked to him but I didn’t get his name or occupation. I don’t even know where he’s from.” She had to burst the bubble before it blew away.
         
        07-24-2008, 03:41 AM
      #3
    Started
    Are you planning on publishing this?
         
        07-25-2008, 09:47 AM
      #4
    Super Moderator
    I'd like to... someday...
         
        07-26-2008, 04:20 AM
      #5
    Started
    Wow! I loved that! Great job! How about...

    A Song Writers Romance

    What do you think?
         
        07-28-2008, 10:09 AM
      #6
    Super Moderator
    ...i like that...
         

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