The 30-something's Thread!! *finally* - Page 124
 
 

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The 30-something's Thread!! *finally*

This is a discussion on The 30-something's Thread!! *finally* within the Horse Talk forums, part of the Keeping and Caring for Horses category

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        07-18-2013, 09:23 AM
      #1231
    Yearling
    On further consideration, my comment applies the world over, not just to Ireland. Many families want their children to marry people just "like them." My grandmother on my Dad's side was not happy when my Dad married a Jewish girl from the East Coast instead of a nice, southern Protestant, and my grandmother on my mother's side was pissed when my Mom married someone who wasn't a nice Jewish boy. My Mom's mother eventually got over it and accepted my father. My Dad's mother never did and we never had much to do with her growing up, as she was bitter and cantankerous and fortunately (my parents say) at the other end of the country.
         
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        07-18-2013, 09:27 AM
      #1232
    Yearling
    Testing, testing. Why is my last post not appearing?

    Edit: Oh, there it is.
    demonwolfmoon likes this.
         
        07-19-2013, 07:47 AM
      #1233
    Showing
    I have a day off! No shows to be at with students and not judging today either. Of course that means I will be catching up on my poor house that hasn't been cleaned all week. DH & DD left to their own devices, not such a good thing. I am staring dreadfully at Mt. Washmore...at least there aren't a ton of dishes too since they took the liberty of eating out all week.

    Been a great week for my students, trophies by the wheelbarrow full and my students took champion showman in 3 different age divisions

    Stan, love the avatar!
         
        07-19-2013, 08:25 AM
      #1234
    Started
    Still super busy so this will be quick,

    Silverspur - No I'm not Irish, I'm Canadian. I think my biggest issue is that it was drilled into me to be accepting of people. My mother, although having never met my husband would have accepted him and not breathed a hint of dislike. I was raised with a mother who accepted my pot-head skaterboy friends to a degree that when I moved abroad, if they saw her in public they would head straight for her for a chat. While I didn't get to her funeral, every single one of them arrived out to show their respects.

    Stan - Fair play to you! I often feel stuck here... often my desire to return home is out of this world.. but I can't legally take the kids with me. Very frustrating to feel somewhat trapped.

    MHF - yay for day off, boo for housework! Story of my life!

    Demon - I hope all is going well in the transition. As for the issue, I say others are far more qualified to comment but it sounds like she her reversing is her way of avoiding going forward. Poss due to lack of confidence in herself to move on? I say MHF and others could offer far more input on how to deal with this than I can!... my days of young horses were racehorses... go outside that spectrum and my knowledge is fairly limited :(

    Anyway, I had it out with DH the other day - I have told him he needs to step up and start sticking up for me or there will be issues. I told him that until that bat shows me respect neither myself nor my kids will be having dealings with her. I said it to DH that she wouldn't treat the other DIL like this, and he agreed with me.

    Anyway guys, I say i'll be around very little over the next few weeks - a friend is comin to stay for a few days and Im workin as much as I can before taking a few days off in Aug to get away. Last show for a few months on Sunday, keep the fingers crossed and I'll let you know how we do :)
         
        07-19-2013, 08:36 AM
      #1235
    Showing
    Good on you for taking a stand Maple! Hope you have a great visit with your friend and good luck at the show on Sunday!

    Demon, totally missed that you got your girl back. How to handle it I would say depends on situation and your comfort level. As long as you can break that thought process and get her feet moving where you want, it's a positive step in fixing it. You did just fine in your circumstances. Did the trainer do any ground driving? I'd start there. If she starts to sull up or back, light her butt up and make her want to go forward. ;) If she doesn't present the opportunity on the ground (which likely she will) I would get her in a large open area (fenced if you aren't sure of your ability to 'ride one out') and when she sulls up, over and under her butt, hard and be prepared for her to launch forward and maybe throw a buck or 2 in on you. Try to be conscious of not 'getting in her way' when she does, be sure you don't catch her in the mouth (it's a normal unintentional reaction) or she'll be getting mixed signals. She needs to know that freezing or backing up is not the right answer. Try to catch her before she starts backing and change her train of thought before she escalates to actually backing. Usually one like that will give clear hesitation and be unwilling to move forward before they get to actually backing up. Hope that makes sense, I'm running on sleep deprived, over heated at horse shows all week brain.
         
        07-22-2013, 03:23 AM
      #1236
    Green Broke
    This thread hasn't been very active in the past few days. Been doing good here, but my disabled uncle is in the hospital with pneumonia. He's doing much better and hopefully will get to come home Tuesday. Also want to mention i'm more than fed up with all the rain here lately.
         
        07-22-2013, 04:30 PM
      #1237
    Green Broke
    We spent several days at Claytor Lake, had an awesome time. Then spent several days catching up on housework, yard work, and laundry. Really wishing we could have stayed longer, it was so nice there. It is miserably hot here, and raining every day, so the mosquitos are horrible and the humidity is worse. I barely want to set foot out of doors myself, and the kids have to be pried away from the tv with a crowbar because it is so miserable out. I feel like we are wasting our summer because of the crap weather, its half over already. And money is tight, as usual, so I can't take them to indoor attractions to keep them busy either. The steering has gone out in one of our tractors, and will likely cost a chunk to fix, because it is so old the parts will be hard to find. And we still haven't gotten our first cut of hay finished because the rain won't stop. Someone else please take it for a while?
         
        07-22-2013, 11:40 PM
      #1238
    Green Broke
    Good news! My uncle got to come home from the hospital today. Finally some good news for a change.
         
        07-24-2013, 07:47 AM
      #1239
    Yearling
    Hi y'all!

    So, here it's the situation in a nutshell:

    Husband was laid off two weeks ago following his mild motorcycle accident (accident other guy's fault!!) after a year of backbreaking work for this man for basically minimum wage!...Believe me, we were very happy for the meager income which the job provided, but no more can we live with me carrying the constant stress of being the primary breadwinner, and DH no more wants me to feel such a degree of responsibility, which now that he is laid off, means I have to work a additional 12 shift/week just to pay BILLS.

    We both want me to go back to school for my Nurse Practitioner, and with the new healthcare act in this country, NP's will be in tremendous demand very soon, and I want to be on that ride...

    There is the possibility that DH may have a job available to him, due to his expertise in construction and welding and being an all around bad-arse, as well as two family members available to get him through the riff-raff any applicant must move through these days just to obtain an INTERVIEW; working oil wells and other parts of said business in Dickinson, North Dakota.

    As far as I'm concerned, I'm ready to go. Present plan?? Sell EVERYTHING WE OWN, (we don't have much by way of assets, but we do have one vehicle that is paid off and could bring a decent price, a metal shop that is fully stocked with EVERY POSSIBLE item a blacksmith could want or need and then some, in to working order, which I believe, if sold off in bulk, could bring a good 10k, minimum...then have a "house sal," where, aside from our beds, our cookware/dishes, towels and some clothing, we'll sell it ALL, and get aU Haul, move to a small apt for starters, replace our furnishings, tv's (all of which are 15+ years old!) computer, and just very slowly put our home back together completely clutter and extra, unneeded stuff free, using the cash from the sales (a new truck being the first item).

    This job for my husband has the probability to allow him to earn about $500/DAY. My job brings about $300/day after tax.

    Thus, if we hit ND, spend nothing, slowly replace the items (all long in need of replacement anyway, trust me!) in our home, and buy an appropriate winter weather clothing and vehicle (ie winter tires/4wD and a good working heater will serve us much better than A/C and a CONVERTIBLE, which we have now + the motorcycle (!)) with our cash holds, and spend time initially living in an inexpensive smaller apt and find a good piece of land to rent or own, we could FINALLY HAVE OUR DREAM!

    However, this ALL FALLS on his ability to get his booty up to ND and stay with family maybe for a few months while I stay here and work, until he's settled in the job for certain and it's time for Jake and I to come met him up there...

    We do have lots of good people/family in that area, so that's a total + . We have minimal debt (and do not own our home here, thankfully!) and with $ made from selling the shop, all the tools, the car and all of our possessions other than beds and clothes and personal items like photos and SOME BOOKS (we have a thousand books truly!) I'd THINK we should be able to get settled comfortably up there?

    Anyone done such a move? Ideas? I know we'd be flip-flopping from hellish summers to hellish winters, but that's quite alright by all of us...and we love the natural makeup of ND...Not to mention the smaller towns, the ethnic makeup, etc...I'm ready to go. I'd give up my job in a second if I knew I could work SOMEPLACE there...he'd be the "major" breadwinner there, so my job would be less important in terms of $, & I could be more choosy.

    I simply pray that God allows this job possibility to work out for him. He needs this as much as we need a chance as a family. Jake wants to move, and none of us have the sort of friends or family HERE whom we would be devastated to leave behind (with the exception of my best friend, John...who would stay my best friend regardless of where either of us went...)

    So, again, ideas, thoughts? Thanks, guys...

    (((hugs to all))). B2H :0)
    demonwolfmoon and Maple like this.
         
        07-24-2013, 07:59 AM
      #1240
    Yearling
    Ooh! Not to mention...the idea of living so much closer to the HF folk, as out seems people are generally in the "area" of North Dakota, at least by a few hundred miles, than TUCSON, AZ, for certain, makes me really happy in terms of finally buying a horse and knowing that folks could truly recommend horses nearer to me than where I presently am...

    The truth is that I want...NEED...a move like this for the well-being of my whole family. It feels right, and I feel like we literally have no chance at a "real life" that is anything other than work work work with absolutely no fun or passion (my passion for horses, Sade and Jake's passion for hunting/fishing/camping, etc...) just cannot HAPPEN HERE, and were slowly dying away, you know?

    I can't pray HARD ENOUGH that this happens. Your help is so greatly appreciated there. We need this desperately.

    Thanks, guys...
         

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