Yeah--that's what I meant by the counselor lady, she does EAP stuff. Thank you. ^^
But I think I know what he is trying to tell me--I think Beamer is trying to tell me that I am angry. I have never had any anger issues before--if anything, I had lack-of-anger issues, if that makes any sense; I barely ever get mad at anyone. Well I've been really irritable lately with my family, and when I work with Beamer, MAN does he get my goat! I get SO angry and I know it's not helping the situation. And then yesterday I went to ride a new horse for the first time--well, I'm used to the flighty or really fresh horses, but he was STUBBORN. I swear...he was getting me so mad, and the more I acted calm, but felt internally POed, the more he refused to do anything. On the ground he was really sweet and respectful, though..But on him it was like he wanted me to get mad...just to prove that there is Something in there unresolved that is gnawing me up inside.
...I just don't know what it is... :/