Am I just anti-social? **Rant** **long** - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 14 Old 01-11-2013, 04:49 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: East Midlands, UK
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Post Am I just anti-social? **Rant** **long**

Right guys,
Today has got me thinking.

When I first moved where I live now (a very quiet village surrounded by fields - the majority used arable/livestock... not for horses sadly haha) I had the opportunity to rent and 11 acre field with just one other woman who I barely saw (she has a veteran that she just does the basics for) I loved it, it was practically my field and I could do what I wanted when I wanted, I never craved horsey friends, as I had my horse as a friend. Now and then my non horsey but very animally in general friends would visit and we'd have a picnic, it was lovely.

Then in summer 2011 the YO (an elderly "farmer" - not that he tends his land any more - who literally has nothing to do with the field other than be the owner of it... which I like, as I can put fences up Etc I sort everything for my self and nobody would interfere) let 2 more people come rent part of the field.

I thought "that's okay, what's a few more horses?" 7 more horses to be precise, 3 of them were wild-caught foals at the time too! Okay, no biggy, although I like my own space, I can deal with a couple more people. But then all their family are here all the time, and one family shouts all the time. The women are friends from before they came to the field, but tend to b*tch about each other behind their backs and drag me into it. There's one guy, and he's an opinionated old fart. In fact, they're all very opinionated, and if it's not their way, they're not keen on the idea. They think they know NH methods (I do a bit of NH stuff myself, just basic, common sense stuff), well, their methods are hilarious to watch.

Not only this, my once open 10 acres and 1 acre paddock are now split up and I have 2 acres (they also picked the best bits and I got left with the bit at the entrance everyone drives on and I get left with tire-scarred land! Grr - (they also complain at me when my horses crowd the gate - I saw crowd, I have 2 - and they can't get in. Well, move them or keep your car on the drive, it's what the drive is there for - to drive on, rather than driving on my field!)

One of the ladies and her stuck up witch of a daughter have the nerve to complain about my youngster being naughty. Yes, she has a mad 3-year-old funny 5 mins where she bolts around the field like a nutter, it's what she does, I'd rather her do it then rather than when I'm riding! And they have some nerve! They have:
- A fat, mean tempered, lazy, naught ex polo pony veteran that they can't ride because she's either not sound or is just in a bad mood and will refuse to work
- A yearling that is mad as sin (she was one of the wild-caughts) and still acts wild - and they laugh when she does naughty stuff
- A 7 y/o pony gelding who is very green, who they bought in the mean time before their yearling is ready to start!

Also, where I used to canter up the 11 acres out of the top gate onto the trails, they have put a zillion electric fences and those wirey little elastic gates where if you're not careful, you get zapped, so now I can't just gallop through the open field, I have to go to one gate, undo, go through, redo (my horse is too tall for me to do it from her back too!)

The other lady I don't mind too much, but she is still opinionated.

So, today, my Mum tells me that the gentleman across the street has a small paddock that he has offered me first refusal to rent, and I know the farmer with the ajoining field and I think he'd let me rent that too, so I could combine them and have a similar size to what I have right now, maybe just a tad more expensive.

But then I though "Will I get lonely!?" Then I though "You were never happier than when you were on your own, do it!"

Anyone have any advice / similar stories?

Sorry for the rant guys, just needed to let a year and a half's worth of ranting out :p
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Last edited by Lockwood; 01-11-2013 at 05:58 PM.
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post #2 of 14 Old 01-11-2013, 04:57 PM
Join Date: Dec 2011
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You aren't anti-social! You just like to things on your own, like me! I like to call myself an individual!

At school, I hate working in groups, because our ideas just don't match up and I dislike having to end up doing all the work.
If I had a horse, I don't think I could ever board with a lot of other people. Even at my lesson barn I get pulled into drama and whatnot.

Anyways, I would definitely switch fields. You can have your own thing going, just like you did before, and you also have the right of first refusal which is nice, meaning the others can't follow you to that field!!!
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post #3 of 14 Old 01-11-2013, 05:07 PM
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Ga.
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Go for it. You sure aren't happy with the place you are now as it is.
Would you really be lonely without those people? I don't think so...or at least I sure wouldn't.
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Just DO it and be happy that you can!
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post #4 of 14 Old 01-11-2013, 05:19 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: East Midlands, UK
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Thanks guys! I just thought to myself "Boy, you don't like other's company!" But to be honest, it's just their company, and how they just imposed. I do like them, I just don't like them all the time, especially when they're in a bitchy mood! And I especially don't like one of the lady's daughter's. I am very nice to her, but urgh, I'm not a fan at all!

Oh, another thing is, my current field is a 2 minute drive with no loos, although I've braved the hedges from time to time (i know it's only a 2 min drive, but when you're in the middle of jobs, who wants to drive home just to use the bathroom!?) But knowing that with the paddock across the road is literally a 20 second walk, I will never have to brave hedges again! Always an advantage :p
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post #5 of 14 Old 01-11-2013, 10:06 PM
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Connecticut
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You sound like me. "I don't mind being around people...just you people". Enjoy your quiet peaceful existence at the other place. Life is too short to put up with idiots.

You just have to see your don't have to like it.
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post #6 of 14 Old 01-11-2013, 10:22 PM
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: new york state
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If you call that anti-social than I am bigger then you I work along, live on my on and all my friends are horses owner at other barn where I go to visit them
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ride a draft and see the world differently
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post #7 of 14 Old 01-11-2013, 10:23 PM
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Brandon, Manitoba Canada
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Nothing wrong with enjoying the peace/quiet with your horse! People say I'm an intravert, which I probably am....I spend alot of time with my horses by myself but I also have lots of friends I ride with around our place or we trailer to other spots to trail ride.....I think moving would make you happier.....
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My horses are the joy in my life.....
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post #8 of 14 Old 01-11-2013, 10:25 PM
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Idaho
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Take the leap. You are not happy with the problems that these people have brought to you. I am not a social butterfly by any stretch of the imagination so really enjoy being by myself. I can function in around other people just fine, I just prefer my horses company more.
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post #9 of 14 Old 01-11-2013, 11:03 PM
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Western ND
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I actually have a very similar story. I had been renting a three acre pasture for two years. About six months ago, the owner decided that she wanted to have a horse again after not having one for 7 years. That's fine, they promised that they were going to fence off the back 3 acres as well because with only two horses on the current pasture, it was pretty much perfect, any more and it would be grazed down in no time. Six acres of pasture for three horses is good. Fine by me.

However, two months after the owner got her horse and there had been no progress of any kind as to getting more pasture going, we got hit really bad with the drought. Now, I like to have enough pasture, so that I don't have to feed hay most of the year. Three horses on the current pasture absolutely decimated it.

Eventually the owners got around to saying that the new pasture was going in, and that they would like to have one more horse out there for more income.

Two more months later, there are FIVE new horses out there, the pasture is under construction, but nowhere near done.
Long story short, the pasture was finished, but it was still not nearly enough land for that many horses comfortably (in my opinion) and I left December 23rd. The poop was building up, the horses were getting knicks,scrapes and cuts like they never had before.

After I left, I find out that (In their opinion) my horses are "crazy" and have no manners. Their nickname for my elderly alpha mare was "B&^CH Mare". Though she never did anything more than move the other horses around occasionally. Didn't even chase them, but apparently that makes her the devil. And that they "can't say they are sad to see me leave 'THEIR' pasture. Yeah.

Lots of people suck. Not everyone. Just a lot. That's why I have no interest in boarding at a regular boarding barn. I lease a pasture and small barn and do all of the work myself. I am happy, my horses are happy and I only have myself to complain to/about. :-D

Proud owner of ~Mana: 6yo Arabian gelding~Pearl 13yo Arabian~Danzer 14yo Arabian mare~ Tiny mini filly
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post #10 of 14 Old 01-12-2013, 05:55 PM Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: East Midlands, UK
Posts: 456
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Thanks for all your comments guys! Makes me feel a lot better and more confident about moving! grayshell, your situation is very similar! They always criticise my horses, saying "Ooh, a tb, they're so high strung" (most mellow horse there *touch wood*) and "Ooh, isn't Red (the youngster) naughty" Uum, no, she will have a silly run around and buck and turn but she's not nasty and will never do it when I'm working with her / near her, she's just getting her energy out in a way that effects nobody (except skidding in my field lol) And I know their criticising is even worse behind my back because they criticise each other's to me, so I know I get the same treatment when I'm not there haha

I just can't wait to sort the new field out! Then I'll be able to spend time doing my own thing once more!

Thanks again for your input guys, definitely helped me make my mind up and vent my anger lol

Last edited by HollyLolly; 01-12-2013 at 06:02 PM. Reason: Changing naughty B word to "criticise"
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antisocial , field , liveries , livery , rent

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