Not sure if this should be considered "horse memorials" but I need some help.
My horse Vegas lost his battle against cancer last year. he was my best friend, my love, my life, my WORLD.
For a while, I thought I had kept my tears under control, but recently, I have been unbelievably upset. I have been thinking about him a LOT lately. I will just randomly start crying and I will have to lock myself in my room and just cry for a few hours. Maybe scream into a pillow or two. This has been happening every day for awhile, and im getting tired of it. I wish I could just cowgirl up, swallow the lump, and move on like a normal person, but I just can't bring myself to do it.
All this may have to do with the fact that the last time I saw him was the day before his birthday. I slept in his stall right next to him all through the night and his body kept me warm. When I woke up, I was cold because, ...yeah. Enough said.
God must have loved him so much, he brought him home early. I know he is doing so much better, pain-free, in the arms of the angels. I'm just waiting for the day I can see his face again.
PLEASE understand im not looking for sympathy or any sappy condolences or anything like that. I just need help on how to control my thought and emotions about him.
Please help. Thank you so much.