Avoiding Arguments

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Avoiding Arguments

This is a discussion on Avoiding Arguments within the Horse Talk forums, part of the Keeping and Caring for Horses category
  • Better way of avoiding arguements

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    01-28-2008, 12:53 AM
Avoiding Arguments

There have been more and more instances of late where threads are breaking out into full blown wrestling matches and it really needs to stop. The time is rapidly coming where people who are constantly the instigators of these arguments will be banned.

I've put down a few thoughts for people to keep in mind when posting in a 'heated' discussion

1) personal attacks are not on!!! A personal attack can be anything from 'your horse is ugly' to 'you are stupid and don't know what you are talking about'. As stated many times, people have different views on many things. These different views don't always match up but in many cases they can have the same outcome. Please try and remember when posting that there are many different ways to accomplish the same outcome at times and IF it is a situation where there is only one right way then come prepared with factual evidence to back it up. This leads me to my next 'pointer'

2) come prepared to back up opposing arguments!!! If a subject has arisen where the poster is clearly wrong find some facts to back up the subject. Usually links to websites where people can look for themselves tend to stop arguments as you can't continue to argue with the facts. A long winded spiel about why they are wrong isnt always needed. Add a link to the site/s and maybe suggest that the person should read this information. No argument needs to be entered into once you have stated your views.

3) don't come in with a better-than-everyone else attitude!!! There are many people on this site, including myself, who have been dealing with horses since before some of you were even born. However, this should not be used as fuel to back up your argument. Often hearing people boast about this and that can add more fuel to the fire. Also, just becuase some of us are older and have gained years of experience doesnt mean that we cannot learn something from someone younger. In many cases the youngens may have learnt something from an older more experienced person. Our eyes and ears shouldnt be closed to the young cause they to can teach us a thign or two and vice versa

4) always keep an open mind!!! Keeping an open mind in many areas of life can be a good way to work. For example; person A has been doing something a certain way all their life. Person B has been doing something a different way but achieving the same result all their life. Persons A & B automatically assume the other person is wrong because they do something a different way. Person B may even have an easier way of doing the said thing. If person A has an open mind then they will be open to the possibility that there is a better way of getting the same result. If there is no open mind available then chances are an argument will result

5) everyone has the choice to make up their own mind!!! Many times we see subjects that we don't agree with or that makes us angry. As in real life, all we can do is state our opinion and allow the other person to make their own mind up rather than bullying them. Bullying is another issue that is starting to creep into the forum. People cannot push other people in any way even if they believe/know the other person is making the wrong decision. This is another way that arguments are starting of late.

6) imagine you were stuck on a remote desert island with everyone actively involved in this forum!!! Eventually, for the sake of survival, everyone must work together and learn to respect each other. That is how we should be in here. There are hundreds of years worth of experience in this forum and rather than sharing and learning we are bickering and fighting and having topics locked because of the fighting.

7) try and void controversial topics!!! There are quite a few topics that are known argument starters. A lot of these topics don't even provide useful information. Before you post a new thread ask yourself whether or not this is a thread people can learn useful information from or is it a thread that will end up in a riot.

Lets keep all the arguing for somewhere else. I personally have completely had it with the way people bicker on this forum. We are trying to attract new members not scare them away. Any continuing offenders whose names are always popping up will soon be banned if this continues. Its the only way to keep the forum friendly and constructive as it should be. This is a place for people to learn not a place for school yard antics

I know this may sound harsh but what is it going to take for everyone to calm down and learn how to deal with situations properly??
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    01-28-2008, 02:09 PM
Well said.
    01-28-2008, 07:19 PM
Thank you :)
    01-28-2008, 09:22 PM
    01-28-2008, 09:30 PM
^^^ *bows*
    01-28-2008, 10:15 PM
Thanks for posting that, jazzy

I totally didn't know we had that green smile! SO COOL
    01-29-2008, 12:27 AM
I had no idea about the green smiley either :)
    01-29-2008, 12:35 AM
Nicely presented. :-D lol

Thanks Jazzy!

You are very appreciated.
    01-29-2008, 12:57 AM
Aaww thanks blu :) that means a lot
    01-29-2008, 06:01 AM
Green Broke
Woo Hoo!!! Go Jazzy!

Very well said!

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