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Barn Drama!

This is a discussion on Barn Drama! within the Horse Talk forums, part of the Keeping and Caring for Horses category
  • Preventing barn drama
  • Barn drama

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    10-20-2010, 11:34 PM
  #21
Green Broke
It is late and I am grouchy but I will say this anyway. Do you realize that YOUR behaviour is just as much a contributor to 'barn drama' as anyone else's?
     
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    10-20-2010, 11:51 PM
  #22
Yearling
I think... I would be really POed if that was me you were talking to.
If you don't want to ride her horse anymore than just say that. Saying that you don't agree with her training methods and going on and on about why is just going to annoy/anger her.

She hates you? Than why did she pay you to ride her horse?
And what are you, a vet? How do you know if there really isn't something wrong with his neck? She's the owner, and she feels like he needs to have the chiropractor out.

Heck, you're upset that she doesn't come out to ride enough? At our barn we're lucky if half of our boarders come out to ride more than 5 times a year! And absolutely none of them take lessons, but that's none of our business. Not everybody can make it out 3 or 4 times a week to ride. Cut her some slack.
     
    10-21-2010, 12:12 AM
  #23
Banned
Why do you care about what she does anyway? It's not effecting you or your horse in any way so stop being dramatic and looking for a pat on the back for "helping" someone out.
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    10-21-2010, 06:29 AM
  #24
Weanling
Wow you acted like a stuck up know it all immature child. I'm surprised she was as nice to you as she was. You were obnoxious.
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    10-21-2010, 07:58 AM
  #25
Weanling
Have to agree with everyone else here.

You stated "before our coach flipped out at her in a jump lesson, yelled at her and told her to ride her <bleeped> horse more"

So you know that her trainer has ALREADY told her this. This is an issue between her and her trainer ONLY, it does not involve you.
And believe me, she knows EXACTLY where she placed in shows, and she knows EXACTLY what the trainer has said to her. She doesn't need you to repeat it, and to be honest, the way you say it comes off as quite rude.

She knows she isn't riding perfectly, but one of two things is likely going on:
1) she doesn't care - riding might just not be as important to her as it is to you
Or 2) she doesn't have the time - there could be family things going on at home, or other things in her life, that prevent her from putting the effort into her horse.

In either case, there's nothing you can do about it. As long as the horse is being cared for, it's none of your business.

Dealing with these issues is your trainer's job. That's what she has experience doing, and that's what she's paid to do. Trust her to handle it appropriately; don't try to take it in your own hands.
     
    10-21-2010, 10:36 AM
  #26
Foal
Its really great that you know so much about horses, and that maybe someday you will be able to use that.
BUT, you seriously need to go to the barn, work with YOUR horse and YOUR horse alone until you know how to better communicate with others. I don't understand WHY you are working someones horse that hates you. Oh wait yes I do, it gives you a chance to be a know it all and an I told you so person towards this other girl.
This is the kind of stuff that turns people off from boarding at a stable or getting involved in 4H or other horse groups. NO ONE wants to be put down about the way they performed in a show or such things. And if I found out my teenage daughter was saying those types of things online or in person to someone else their horse would be sold so fast and their computer would be out the door.
You are at a PUBLIC facility and there are other adults, kids and families who want to enjoy what they are paying for without childish "barn drama".
Personally, I would not want my girls to be treated in such a manner that it would stick with them the rest of their life and possibly keep them from going to shows or working with their horses because a peer made some nasty remarks about their horse or their riding ability (not everyone has been riding since they could walk).
Gee, now at the bottom of the page I see this is not your first thread regarding "barn drama" and in your first thread you were upset because no one would even reply to YOUR DRAMA.
     
    10-21-2010, 11:45 AM
  #27
Foal
First off, if she is paying you to ride then you are technically not an amateur rider...are you still showing as armature? Because then you are in the wrong and this can effect both you and your trainer.

Second, how she trains her horse is not your business. I have a horse that has issues with bending and we work on it every day. She had a huge neck injury years ago (A horse decided to try to eat my Lucy! :( ) and now it looks like she is not bending the proper way, when in all actuality she is trying!
You sound full of yourself putting her horse show results in her face as the judgement of her horsemanship and treatment of her horse! Sometimes horses, like people, just don't like stress of tests! Sometimes the best horses win and sometimes they are DQ'ed. I don't remember who said it, but at the WEG jumping finals the rider spoke and said "Most of the times the Shows come down to who is the luckiest". Does Rodrigo Pessoa (My boyfriend <3) deserve 4th place because his last horse was just tired and wanted to go home? Maybe so, but that horse is still worth more and better trained than any horse that any of us will ever have the opportunity to jump with!

Maybe this girl shows for fun! That's what I do! I'm in my mid 20's, I don't expect to ever get a training job, or to go to nationals....so I don't care if a 16 year old beats me in the ring. There are bigger things in the world than your horses bending and place it gets. As long as she loves her animal and gives it food than she is fine with me!

As for the "She never comes up!" Well, when you start to pay for every cost your horse aquires and all of the "human bills" you will realize that you need to work darn hard to support a horse and yourself. I work 50 hours a week at one job, and I do odd jobs at the barn for extra money. Sometimes its hard to go up there everyday to take care of my horse. I usually ask one of my friends to at least throw her in the turn out when I can't make it. Does that make me a bad horse owner?!
     
    10-21-2010, 12:29 PM
  #28
Showing
Folks, while I agree with many replies here, I think it's time to move on with the thread because 1) it's going in circles and 2) at this point jumping on OP over and over again with the same arguments is no better than her dialogue with the horse owner.

I'll be closing this thread. BB, if you want to continue to discuss the barn drama here, let me know, please.
     

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