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Beginners and horses

This is a discussion on Beginners and horses within the Horse Talk forums, part of the Keeping and Caring for Horses category
  • Male ego horses

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    03-11-2013, 12:45 AM
  #1
Weanling
Beginners and horses

So I have a bf that I recently took riding, he wouldnt let me direct him or tell him what to do he claimed he was a good rider(he rode when he was little), he expected my horses to act perfectly. So anyway the only horses he rode before were supposidly 'absolutly perfect'. Now he is bashing my horses saying they arent trained good enough, BTW he refused to kick the horse to make it go(i usually say walk or make a clicking noise but the horse wasnt responding to him so I told him to make her do it) and did many things wrong like pulling both sides of the reins while trying to turn the horse.

My horses are well trained, but because he doesnt know anything about horses he thinks they are absolutly terrible. They listen just fine for me. Im so angry, he tells everyone how bad my horses are.

So anyway I asked him if he wanted to get a horse for himself, I was thinking an older beginner horse gelding you know the average kids horse, well he told me he wants a wild black stallion, and he is going to train it himself, and its going to be WAYYY better then my dumb horses. Wth REALLY? Wow I seriously want to get him the horse and see him try!!! Beginners have ridden my horses before without problems, as long as they do what I tell them. Outside of horses we have a good relationship and I love him, but he is such an idiot!
Sorry people just so upset with this guy....
     
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    03-11-2013, 12:59 AM
  #2
Super Moderator
Sorry, but if he loves you he will not dis your horses to other people. Sounds like he might not be such a good match for you, IMHO.
     
    03-11-2013, 01:02 AM
  #3
Weanling
Quote:
Originally Posted by tinyliny    
Sorry, but if he loves you he will not dis your horses to other people. Sounds like he might not be such a good match for you, IMHO.
Ya im just so used to it because I grew up in a family that hated horses, lets just say the BBQ joke came up a lot concerning my horses.
If he doesnt start riding with me and liking my horses he is going to be gone.
HorseCrazyTeen likes this.
     
    03-11-2013, 01:29 AM
  #4
Started
Or maybe you can accept that he doesn't have similar interests? Don't condemn him to 'ride with me and like them darnit!' or 'fine then, leave me'. I'm sure he has interests that he doesn't share 100% with you. I agree he doesn't need to be bashing your horses, but try explaining to him why you don't like it instead of being confrontational and don't invite him to ride with you anymore.
LisaG likes this.
     
    03-11-2013, 02:14 AM
  #5
Yearling
You can let him know that it is pretty clear by his 'black stallion' comment that he is not a horse person (and would end up hurt badly, although it would be fun to give him one and watch the train wreck), I don't know any horse person that would take him seriously after hearing that. Honestly that is something a child would say, does he know stallion (or black stallion) is a gender and not a breed? Sounds silly, but I know kids who think that, I don't know how many times I've had to explain it to my very young nephews. I still have a few that somehow think 'wild stallions' are something special. One nephew was quite suprised to find out his weanling/yearling mini is a stallion! And all three of my weanling/yearling colts! (yeah, he gets it now)
     
    03-11-2013, 05:04 AM
  #6
Green Broke
Honestly? Why would you subject your animals to this person is beyond me.

Nothing good will come of this, and you might as well realize that.

He will not listen to you in this matter, and I predict that if you stay hooked up with him, his attitude will be the same on everything.

Forget another horse, find another BF.
Skyseternalangel likes this.
     
    03-11-2013, 06:39 AM
  #7
Foal
I think he was just trying to save face. Clearly if the horses would not listen to him, it must be the horse, not him, right! =) Poor male ego.
My daughter and I were just talking about people who have this illusion that stallions are somehow special. Like every wild male horse is not a stallion, you know!
My husband has no interest in my horses, and that is fine. I have no interest in some of the things HE enjoys. I think having separate interests is not a bad thing. While having a BF to ride with would be great, I would not rule the guy out just because he does not ride. If he supports YOUR riding, does not try to make you stop what you love doing, then I would not kick him to the curb just yet!
LisaG and Animallover707 like this.
     
    03-11-2013, 07:54 AM
  #8
Foal
Quote:
Originally Posted by Animallover707    
Ya im just so used to it because I grew up in a family that hated horses, lets just say the BBQ joke came up a lot concerning my horses.
If he doesnt start riding with me and liking my horses he is going to be gone.
I'm so sorry you had to deal with this while you were growing up. Just because your family didn't like horses, doesn't mean they have to put yours down.

Maybe you need to keep your horses just for you, don't share them with your boyfriend? It will give you something you can do for yourself, a chance to get away and enjoy your horses.

I've had horses on/off since I was 12. My family was not a horse family, but they always supported me with my horses. My DH of almost 29 yrs likes horses and can ride, but prefers fishing over horses. It's good to have interests that are different. It makes the times that you are together that much better.
Animallover707 likes this.
     
    03-11-2013, 08:22 AM
  #9
Green Broke
From the sounds of his attitude, I doubt you will be able to keep your horse life to yourself. That means it may come down to him or the horses.

Mr. WTW is grounded for life off my horses because:

A) He thought he'd be cute and try to re-invent the "horse riding wheel" with his race car driving mentality.

B) In 11 years, only about 10% of what I have tried to teach him regarding horse management/health has sunk in and that is because he is what I call a "surface person" where the horses are concerned, just wants to get by doing the grunt work in the barn, yet he's an authority on them when discussing them at his work

We have only been married 11 years and are in our mid-60's. At this juncture of my life, I can put up with his antics because he doesn't try to over-rule me where the horses are concerned; we would not be together if he did.

You are young and have to decide if you honestly want to put up with this person's horse attitude for the rest of your life. Based on your comments, I could easily see him abusing your horse(s) when you weren't around.

And let us all Pray he really doesn't follow thru on his half-baked notion to buy a young horse and train it himself---------------------
     
    03-11-2013, 09:52 AM
  #10
Foal
Omg he sounds like a real jerk… seems too think he knows it all jus becuz he rode a horse as a child… so did I haha and i’ve only just gotten my first horse and i’m listening to everyone taking in the advice and stuff.. I think you should get him that horse and see how good he thinks he is when the horse proves him wrong… and that's if you can actually train the horse or get the horse trained afterwoulds maybe… ha would teach him a lesson then maybe he would start listening to you… I would be very pissed too if my bf talked about my horse that way or in your case horses.. its very understandable hun xox all the best I hope your okay xo
     

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