The "Black Stallion" Syndrome - Vent
 
 

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The "Black Stallion" Syndrome - Vent

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    12-12-2012, 10:42 AM
  #1
Started
The "Black Stallion" Syndrome - Vent

The magical "bond".

Urg! I've gotten so frustrated with this lately. It is especially common in begginers, and particularly young beginners, but I've seen riders of all experience levels and ages suffering from this.

I think its probably the culprit with many people when they buy a horse and two months later their frustrated they havent formed a magical bond and galloped off into the sunset together, bareback and bridleless.

Horses are hard work. Just like human relationships. As has been proven by the multitude of people who have been swept away by their hansom prince(or charmed by the princess), then they have a fairy tale wedding and come crashing down to earth with the realization that you don't magically live happily ever after.

I have seen so many people that humanize the horse, rather than giving it the respect it deserves as its own species. How many times do you hear "Pricess came running up to the fence and knickered at me because we have that special bond, she loves me!" It doesn't have anything to do with that treat in your pocket, does it?
Or how bout, "I had to sell him, we just didn't bond"
Or "Bronco bucked me off because I didn't bring him his treat saturday, I hurt his feelings"

Sigh. Sorry for the novel, I'm just tired of seeing people hurt and horses ruined because they can't separate reality from fiction, and human emotion from horse.
     
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    12-12-2012, 10:47 AM
  #2
Yearling
No kidding, a person also cannot just jump on a horse and ride like "John Wayne" without having the know-how...A horse does not act like a four-wheeler!
     
    12-12-2012, 10:56 AM
  #3
Weanling
I know this probably isn't what you meant, but sometimes it is a good thing for someone to sell a horse because they didn't bond - so long as we're talking about realistic personality/energy level/etc issues and this isn't a person that's going to go through horse after horse and sell them all eventually because none of them "bonded."
     
    12-12-2012, 11:02 AM
  #4
Yearling
Hey, it's nice to dream

I get where you are coming from though. They do deserve respect, and that's how you earn theirs. It is sad to see people humanizing them.
     
    12-12-2012, 11:02 AM
  #5
Started
Quote:
I know this probably isn't what you meant, but sometimes it is a good thing for someone to sell a horse because they didn't bond - so long as we're talking about realistic personality/energy level/etc issues and this isn't a person that's going to go through horse after horse and sell them all eventually because none of them "bonded."
I'm not talking about the horse and rider truly not working together, some personalities don't match, some horses and riders are not suited to each other.
I'm talking about people who expect to magically develop some sort of "bond" with a horse, without putting in the time and effort it takes to build a true partnership(equine equivalent of love at first sight). When this perfect relationship doesnt miraculously appear, the owner decides they didn't "bond", and moves on to another horse.
     
    12-12-2012, 11:07 AM
  #6
Yearling
Blue Spark!!! I love you right now!!! I keep getting into the same annoying situations with my father in law!!! He lives in this fantasy world where he thinks i'm going to break his half crazy, food aggressive, cow chasing for fun, unbroken, barely handled Quarter pony type mare. And he's going to show her and all that jazz, meanwhile i've been dumped by her 3 times!!! But he still expects me (i'm the horse person right ;) ) to break her for him. Oh yeah and he wants to put his step daughter whom is mentally and physically disables on her back, along with his 3yo son!!!! Then he plans on breeding her so his step daughter can have a horse too!!! GAH!!! This fantasy world is driving me crazy!!! But in no way does he ever go out and take care of this horse either!!! He doesn't acknowledge her unless he sees me working with mine!!!
Yes I agree, its a good thing for some real riders to sell horses they don't click with, it could end badly for both. But in this fantasy world where your just going to jump up on their back and just ride off....ok good luck with that, and selling a horse just because it didn't do what you wanted/expected, is a whole different story. Its sad....
I"m good now LOL
     
    12-12-2012, 11:07 AM
  #7
Weanling
Quote:
Originally Posted by BlueSpark    
I'm not talking about the horse and rider truly not working together, some personalities don't match, some horses and riders are not suited to each other.
I'm talking about people who expect to magically develop some sort of "bond" with a horse, without putting in the time and effort it takes to build a true partnership(equine equivalent of love at first sight). When this perfect relationship doesnt miraculously appear, the owner decides they didn't "bond", and moves on to another horse.
I figured that's what you meant, and I definitely agree with you - I just wanted to clarify in case some people got their tails tied in a knot about selling a horse because of personality differences. There's no shame in moving on if the two of you just don't work well together, so long as you're realistic about your expectations.
     
    12-12-2012, 11:10 AM
  #8
Showing
Agreed, BS.

I've had 6 horses and ridden countless others over the years, and if I was waiting for some kind of super majickal, Vulcan mind-meld bond, I'd have never had the pleasure of enjoying the animals for the individuals they were and are.

I had ONE with whom I had a tighter bond than the others, but that doesn't mean I believe the others weren't 'right' for me. As long as the animal does its best for you and doesn't actively despise you, there's no reason to sell it on hoping for that 'perfect' horse.

If someone does that, maybe they need to buy one of those animatronic Butterscotch horses and leave the real ones for people who live in reality.
     
    12-12-2012, 11:12 AM
  #9
Trained
What are you talking about? Ricci and I have a majikal bond! You're just jealous! =P

But seriously. It is ridiculous. One of my biggest peeves is when people have that, "no one will be able to work with this horse like I can," or "my horse won't work well for anyone but me." I believe in one-person horses to an extent, but for the most part, I think people are just fooling themselves.

You can't "love" your horse into the Olympics or Grand Prix.
     
    12-12-2012, 11:15 AM
  #10
Yearling
I've met a lot of women in their 40's that get their first horse and expect this. Also see it a lot in dogs, used to train them, one lady didn't want to in force rules because they were her "kids" (she has two young daughters), I got annoyed (after months of trying to explain and said so you let you kids poop on the floor, chew on the couch and lick the counter too? She was shocked to say the least.
     

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