I apologize if I ramble on, I have an awful habit of that that I can't kick, so if it gets long you can skim and I'll bold the main part..
I've been having the WEIRDEST problem with my somewhat-new horse. Well, moreso with my confidence I guess.
I have a really great horse (a former lesson horse)..he's a 13 y/o very sane TB who's supposedly "been there and done that"..there are times he's a little jumpy but never does anything major.
Shortly after I bought him I fell off during a lesson (100% totally my fault, he was an angel) and got hurt, and ever since then I've been scared of him. Well, not scared of him, but scared of riding him. Which I know is something that can happen when you get hurt but the weird thing is..I'm not scared of riding. Throw me on any horse at all, a horse that's bucked me off, a greenie, a horse that's hospitalized somebody, or even just a sort of unstable horse, and I can ride him. And I know that because I've ridden horses that fit into all of those categories recently and would again with no problem..Any other horse I can ride, but here I am scared of this gentle-as-a-lamb lesson horse of mine.
So at first I was nervous riding him at all, but now I'm able to walk him around just fine and deal with his occasional jumpiness with ease, but I haven't been able to get myself to bring him up to a trot (that was the gait I fell off at =/ well sort of..haha)
And before you say I should be working with a trainer, I do have one, a great one at that, and I know this probably sounds totally stupid, trust me I know, but I just need to handle this particular issue on my own. I basically taught myself to ride and even to train pretty much on my own, and it's just how I'm most comfortable in this case. I know myself and where I am right now I would only cave under any pressure at all from anyone even watching while I'm riding..
And I know that as soon as I do it I'll be fine. I don't lack the ability to do it, not at all..and I've gotten back into shape since the injury so that isn't the problem. Once I can handle the trot I think I will be good as new and continue on with my training, but it's just getting to that point..
So I've set up a plan. Either tomorrow or..whenever the next day is when it isn't pouring rain (tomorrow's forecast is questionable), I'm going to put him in his western saddle (I rode western for years and am much more comfortable that way but wanted to learn something new and have been pushing myself to deal with this in the English saddle to get more used to it, but I think that turned out to be a crap plan since it's been months) and just do it.
But anyway, I'm ranting on..sorry.
To the point, I had this thought that what I could really use is some of those corny inspirational horse quotes that I could save in my phone and pull it out when I'm about to ride. I feel like a total sap but I think it would really help. So if anyone knows of any that might help in my situation, please pull them out for me..I sure am needing it, haha
Thank you all for your time..and wish me luck!