dating a farrier, how do I deal with his schedule??

CecillaB, I praise you for your patience and your attitude about your husband's career. I also thank your husband for his service. However there is a world of difference between a career soldier and a farrier.

A soldier has no choice, a farrier does. I can't imagine a case where the farrier gets a call at 8:00 in the evening because Ole Dobbin threw a shoe and he has to get out there now. In the event of a show the next morning, maybe - but how many times will that happen? ... He has to learn that there is a time when the phone gets shut off.

I realize that he is young and is making his reputation while building his following but that is a tremendous lack of respect for his customers to be calling at odd hours and demanding his services immediately. No farrier does that. Emergencies happen but 90% of the time, it isn't an emergency - it's just a customer who has no respect for his/her farrier.

When I was showing and if my horse came up with a loose shoe before a show, my farrier would be out there at 5:00 in the morning - not 9:00 on a Friday night. He had a life and I had to respect that.

My 2¢

Well you all have valid points. I have not been to work with him even though I would like to. His driving is his alone time for the most part. And he has had an apprentice now since March........So there is not much hope of me going too. We have spent little to no time together since march for various reasons on both our parts. It's sad really. We are incredible together. He has many things going on......family issues, apprentice, full work schedule....secondary jobs even to fill the holes when he's not shoeing. He's a workaholic.

It seems there is little hope at this point, as work is mainly his only focus. I hear all the things I want to hear, I love you, want it to work etc etc but then all he does is work. And it's making him grouchy, he has too much going on. We have backed off our commitment so there is less hurt because we don't see each other. But......this doesn't seem to me to be a good way to make a relationship work. I've decided to be supportive and see what happens. I've backed off mostly, and just tell him how I feel every now and then. I'm at a loss.....although he's supposed to do my horses feet tonight.