Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Gallant, Alabama
Feeling the guilt over our fall... and other things. Advice please...!
I was thinking of all this last night and feel like I really need some advice.
I dunno how to type this... things are really running through my head a mile a minute...
I’m feeling really guilty and upset now that the fact that we actually fell and my girl is hurt worse than she’s ever been has sunk in now. I feel like curling up and crying, I feel so bad about it. I know that it wasn’t my or her fault, but that doesn’t make me feel better. My mare put her trust in me and I got her hurt, end of story...
So many things are going through my head... My girl is 15... she’s not 10, 11, or 12 anymore. She doesn’t really seem to be in a ‘fast’ mood like she used to be when she was younger (I’m talking about how she acted before we fell today). She’s just not really that ‘young’ of a horse anymore, I guess. I mean, I know she’s still in her prime, but she is getting older, too.
So many questions... Is it fair for me to ask her to do things like ride over the mountains and stuff? Is it fair for me to ask her to ride all day long like we used to...? The last few times we rode, we really didn’t seem to click. I mean, we did... but we didn’t. I feel like it would be in her best interest to kinda... semi-retire my girl. It sounds stupid, and maybe it’s just the guilt talking, but I feel like she’s just not the horse she used to be, even though she’s still not old. I mean, we’d still ride, but maybe not as far and not as long, or if we did go for longer rides, not as much fast paced gaits... more walking and more longer breaks... The last few times we’ve ridden, something has felt off... not in her movement or anything, just a niggling at the back of my mind that something was off, but I ignored it, thinking that it was just because I wasn’t used to her anymore.
I don’t want to ever get rid of my girl, but if we aren’t clicking like we used to... well, I’m not going to get rid of her... I love her too much, but maybe it would be best to give her a small break after she gets better from her injuries... perhaps not even ‘semi-retired’... just... ‘quarter-retired’... She likes to ride and go places, but if... I dunno... I just feel so guilty! I wish my uncle were still alive to tell me that everything will work out... I feel like I should be blamed for her getting hurt!
Horseshoe Loop Farm: Home of Gypsie (22 y/o TWH mare), Dakota (10 y/o TWH gelding), Codie (18 y/o Walkaloosa gelding) & Harlow (9 y/o APHA mare)