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Feeling like nothing is coming together - RANT

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  • When you feel like nothing is coming together, work money

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    07-16-2012, 01:09 PM
  #11
Yearling
I think what you need to do is find a good lesson barn with DEAD, DEAD broke, push button lesson horses.

I don't think you were experienced enough at the beginning of your life with horses nor are you experienced enough now to work with horses that are less than broke. It takes a lot of time to get to that level and as you've seen, green + green = black and blue.

Lessons might seem boring at first or after a while but I think it's better to be bored than breaking every bone in your body.

Also, lessons are much cheaper than owning a horse, so if you are low on funds, don't get a green horse! Get some good quality lessons and work off the price with barn work if you have to.

I think you need to spend time and effort finding an excellent barn. Ask around and see what people recommend, and not your "friends" who are obviously not true friends!

Then, you need to spend time building up your confidence on the calmest school master you can find. I don't care if you have to stick to the walk, go on the lunge line, be lead, etc. There's no shame in that, even professional riders still go on the lunge line now and then, etc. One person on this forum described confidence as kind of like a bank and I really like that. You're currently in confidence debt and you need to pay that off and then start saving "money" again.

Sometimes, lessons just level out in difficulty if that makes sense. You'll feel like you're not getting anywhere, or that your instructor might be holding you back, etc. And that might be true, but sometimes you just have to wait it out and the difficulty level will increase and you'll be challenged again.

Sorry if I seem mean or anything but I think it's important that I emphasize this point: don't waste your time and health with greenies at this point.
     
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    07-16-2012, 09:17 PM
  #12
Green Broke
Hey guys.

Cinder - Unfortunately within an hour and half drive there is only one lesson place. I went there but they're owned by a boarding school, and only have one class for adult non students. The instructor was always using me for demonstrations and saying "you probably already know this" when we did anything new. And I was spending more on my one lesson a week than I am now on horse care. I have no problem walk/trot/cantering/jumping quiet horses and was quite comfortable walking and trotting on Rosie before injuries and rain and saddle problems. I just feel like she's always going to be injured and I'll never get anywhere. I kind of wish I could board her somewhere else with less horses in her paddock and stuff but that's not really an option.

Before I took the falls I used to be pretty decent. I'd compete a fair bit and had years of lessons. I'd ride practically any horse and everything was peachy. My mare, who I eventually sold, actually came pretty good before I sold her, and was a solid 5 year old who I could do small competitions on, trail out alone, just do heaps on. And I'd brought her along from a yearling.

It was just once I started to lose my confidence, everything else started falling apart.

Rookie - I just graduated my BA in Sociology and I am thinking - why did I do this? It qualifies me for nothing! But I had two trimesters before the new year, when I will hopefully start a Master of Social Work, so I thought I would do an Honours as I had good marks in my BA. But I am dreading do another two years, but I really want something that will qualify me for positions. I wish I was half way through! I'm really just starting my thesis and the more research I do the more I feel that I am totally not interested in it.

Regula - It's summer here! Not much going on besides people hiding away from the cold!

I do really appreciate all the replies, and I am taking it on board. Lots of people have harder lives than me but sometimes knowing that doesn't help.

I've just got to work things out. My lease is up in November so I will be moving then, I'll take Rosie with me and find a new boarding place down there, hopefully with less horses. I'll have to start all over again with friends, but I've looked around that area and there do seem to be some groups and places to volunteer. There is also more employment. It's closer to my family, without living in the city which is what I want so I am hoping it all works out. I just need to get from here to there meanwhile.
     
    07-16-2012, 09:46 PM
  #13
Started
Can't help with much, but I have a BA in Asian Studies. How's that for useless? I felt the same way about my thesis. Got to the point where I had to 'fortify' myself with a solid beer before I could force myself to sit down and even look at the ****ed thing. I can't say I've even sat down and read the entirety of my own thesis, but I can say that the idea of doing so makes me want to go grab another drink just thinking of it now 5 years later. Grind it out, get it done, hate the process.

I would get out of your living arrangements ASAP. Living with people who don't make your life better in a house you hate will eat away any happiness you can find on a daily basis. Even if you have to take a financial hit, it will be worth it. Maybe one of the folks from church would like to take over your lease for you? Or officially or unofficially sublet your portion out?

I spent 8 years in college. IME (n=1) life after school has almost zero relation to life during, for better or worse. Hang in there, two more years isn't too bad so long as you can do it and still have a student debt/loan payment you'll be able to live around.
Saskia likes this.
     
    07-17-2012, 03:19 AM
  #14
Showing
Quote:
Originally Posted by Saskia    
Skye - You wrote a paper about chickens????? Lol, I have to hear about that.

My lease.. landlords are 4000kms away and pretty broke, besides I don't think there is much they can do, the house is older than it looks. They fixed the sewerage, but the rest... I don't know. I plan to leave in November and move closer to my family and study by distance.

The whole friends thing... I moved in with two girls very involved in the church and I gave it a try. I became good friends with them went with them and started hanging out with their friends, as I didn't have many friends left here when I returned from Denmark, this went on for months. I went to church to see what it was like, read some of the bible and discussed it but I didn't agree with many of their stances and interpretations and decided to no longer go. Now they're constantly asking me if I am going to church and bible study, telling me how everyone needs to be saved by the gospel etc. I tell them that I think its great that they are so passionate but that everyone has their own beliefs and opinions and others shouldn't be pushed on it but they are pretty forceful. Their friends are always coming over to do bible readings and get togethers and I just don't feel comfortable around them when they're like that. As their life is based around the church it's becoming harder to maintain a friendship with them.

I feel like my life is like a house of cards. I look closer and there is nothing there. Everything I wanted to do and be has changed, and the things that I thought were important to me, my relationships with others, seem to have no real place in my life. I feel like I am living a facade.

Has anyone been through this?

Does anyone know of any good trainers/books to help with some more groundwork stuff? She's good with the basic yielding hindquarters, lunging, backing etc but some more stuff that I can get her doing while I wait for her to get better?

Haha it was awful.. awful paper about chickens but it was beautifully worded

Yes I know what you mean. 80% of my close friends in high school were very religious and they'd encourage me to go to their youth groups and church and always preach the bible quotes. It was rough but it sounds cake compared to what you are experiencing.

Life changes all the time. Sometimes things you think are important are not, and other things not important become important. Including friends, careers, future things.

It's part of maturing and evolving and experiencing and perceiving.


If you need to talk anytime, hit me up :)
     

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