Fighting and tears - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 13 Old 09-28-2010, 10:36 PM Thread Starter
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Fighting and tears

Who has the fights with their parents every time you get caught up in horseland? I remember all throughout my life I would go through horse magazines and circle all the things I would need for my imaginary horse and show my mom and dad. My mom would smile and say sometime in the future, and so I'd show my dad. He would yell at me and tell me that there's no way I'm ever getting a horse while I live here, and those few words were enough to make me cry. I never stopped though, I couldn't. Well now my mom says yes, and my dad (who is going through extremely tough times) says no. We just got into a fight downstairs in the kitchen and I was on the verge of tears again, but then he said "im not paying for YOUR horse." Well it's never been my horse before its always been "a horse, that horse." Anyway I know he's about to give in haha. For the first time ever I didn't walk away crying, but smiling and feeling like I was in heaven. Oh the small things in life... just had to share.
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post #2 of 13 Old 09-29-2010, 06:34 PM
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Originally Posted by GuitarChump View Post
Who has the fights with their parents every time you get caught up in horseland? I remember all throughout my life I would go through horse magazines and circle all the things I would need for my imaginary horse and show my mom and dad. My mom would smile and say sometime in the future, and so I'd show my dad. He would yell at me and tell me that there's no way I'm ever getting a horse while I live here, and those few words were enough to make me cry. I never stopped though, I couldn't. Well now my mom says yes, and my dad (who is going through extremely tough times) says no. We just got into a fight downstairs in the kitchen and I was on the verge of tears again, but then he said "im not paying for YOUR horse." Well it's never been my horse before its always been "a horse, that horse." Anyway I know he's about to give in haha. For the first time ever I didn't walk away crying, but smiling and feeling like I was in heaven. Oh the small things in life... just had to share.
How are you? how about working at a stable doing stall cleaning etc in exchange of lessons or a lease?
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post #3 of 13 Old 09-29-2010, 11:21 PM Thread Starter
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Better news. Showed my dad some videos he's coming around. The zoning regulations here changed and now I have enough land. I'm building a corral this week with a lean and a barn and pasture soon after! If the horse doesn't take to our land I will board somewhere better. Ahh finally!
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post #4 of 13 Old 09-30-2010, 09:08 AM
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I'm glad to hear there's a possibilty you can get a horse, but I understand where your dad is coming from. From your OP it sounds like you've been nagging him and trying to play at his emotions by crying when you don't get your way.

Horses are very expensive and it's not realistic to expect someone else to pay for your horse. If your dad says no, then work and get the money yourself to pay for it.
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post #5 of 13 Old 09-30-2010, 09:52 AM Thread Starter
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I'm glad to hear there's a possibilty you can get a horse, but I understand where your dad is coming from. From your OP it sounds like you've been nagging him and trying to play at his emotions by crying when you don't get your way.

Horses are very expensive and it's not realistic to expect someone else to pay for your horse. If your dad says no, then work and get the money yourself to pay for it.
Nah i don't cry to toy with his emotions, it's just that horses mean pretty much everything to me. When I hear it can't happen it crushes me.
I have all the money he just thinks I'm going to get bored and dump the horse on him.
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post #6 of 13 Old 09-30-2010, 09:56 AM
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What do you mean by, "I have all the money"?

How much money do you have? Horses are a continual drain on income, and unless you have a decent job, you'll soon find yourself unable to pay for everything the animal needs.

Horses aren't some pie in the sky ideal; they're real animals that take a lot of work, sacrifice, and money to keep properly.
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post #7 of 13 Old 09-30-2010, 10:05 AM Thread Starter
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I have + $3000 to get started and a job that will take care of all monthly bills, allow me to put aside some for emergencies, and have pocket money.
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post #8 of 13 Old 09-30-2010, 10:10 AM
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$3,000 is a good start, but you'll be surprised how quickly that goes, especially if you have to invest in putting up fencing, a run in shed, and a barn. The labor might be free, but building materials are costly.

It's also not good for a horse to be alone, so unless you're getting two, maybe you should think of boarding instead of having the poor creature at home all by itself.

Last edited by Speed Racer; 09-30-2010 at 10:14 AM.
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post #9 of 13 Old 09-30-2010, 10:30 AM Thread Starter
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Honestly I don't know what to do about that. I think it's possible that I will have another horse here, but even so, it would take about 2 months after my horse comes home for that to happen. I'm getting a wild mustang and there aren't any places willing to take that on until the horse is at least fence broken and halter trained.
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post #10 of 13 Old 09-30-2010, 11:22 AM
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I think you're being rude to your father. I assume your parents own the land, so you cannot force him to allow you to have a horse. You said he's going through tough times, so why are you forcing the issue? You are purposely aggravating him by asking over and over.

Your parent's land does not equal "your" land. Pastures and barns require upkeep. Who's buying the tractor to mow? Who's paying for underground water pipes to be put in? Who's mowing the grass, removing or breaking down the manure? Who's going to be shoveling paths in the snow? Who's going to pay any taxes/building permits required to put up structures?

Have some respect for your father and let it go...

Unless you plan to use your money to board, and therefore will not burden your father at all. Then do whatever you want.
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