Hard Decisions.... what should i do??? what can i do???

       The Horse Forum > Keeping and Caring for Horses > Horse Talk

Hard Decisions.... what should i do??? what can i do???

This is a discussion on Hard Decisions.... what should i do??? what can i do??? within the Horse Talk forums, part of the Keeping and Caring for Horses category
  • What can i do with a difficult horse

Like Tree29Likes

LinkBack Thread Tools
    04-02-2013, 01:43 PM
Hard Decisions.... what should i do??? what can i do???

Sorry this is really long, but please read it...

This is very hard for me to even think about doing, but it seems as if it is my only option..... DayKota was bought for me by my dad last summer from a guy that he worked with who had 4 acres of property and only 1/2 an acre was fenced for his 3 horses that he had. Now he is on a 30 acre pasture with 5 other horses. Ben(the guy we got Day from) only took Day out to ride him an that was only 1 or 2 times a month being that Day wasn't taken out very much or messed with at all in the time that Ben had him, I knew that there would be problems to fix with Day. When we got him he would rub me against trees while riding, rear, laydown, and everything he could do to try to get me off(but buck he isn't a bucker.) I checked the tack and did everything I could do to fix the problems and they did come to an end, he stoped rearing and laying down on me and wouldn't rub on trees unless I let him(which I didn't). Eventually he stoped rubbing on trees completely. I've been through so much with this horse, colic, laminitis, rainrot, hoofrot, ect, I've been in the hospital from him throwing me, kicking me, ect. But weve also had a lot of good days, I got him running barrels, poles, he does western pleasure, sorts/cuts/boxes cows, rides English, I can ride him in a halter and lead rope. I put everything I have into this boy and I have a strong bond with him, but im not sure he has the same bond with me.... </3, he means the world to me and I love him more than anything. I've tried so hard to turn him into something, I've showed him, paraded him, camped, trailed, and everything, he was the one horse that I really trusted, yes you can say he was my baby, I've done everything with him. And no I didn't let him get his way, that's not the reason he acts the way he does(explain later), he knows im boss, and he respects, well respected, me. After all I've been through with him and done with him, I don't understand whats going on with him now, Daykota started his rearing, laying down, and rubbing on trees again, but he does more now, he bites, he wont stand while im mounting, wont take the bit when im tacking him up, wont let the farrier do his feet, when im walking around barrelsfor the bad he tries to kick them down and then tries getting me off. I don't know whats wrong, I've used the same bits on him since I've gotten him, I use a shanked snaffle for western pleasure and trail riding and a o-ring snaffle for speed. I've used the same saddles as well. My 4h leader doesn't know whats wrong him him either, they don't understand the change in him, from sweet loving willing gelding to unrespectful, pushy, I don't even know what to call him, geldling. I've tried everything I can do, put all I have into him, I give him my 100% all the time, I feel like theres nothing left to do but give up, he wont do anything anymore, he wont listen, refuses to go and when he finally does start moving he wont stop. He kicks when I try to touch his feet or walk around behind him. He bites when im brushing him out, and no matter what I do to stop the problems he just doesn't listen. I had a guy who owns 8 studs, he raised and trained all but 2 of them, work with Day and he says there is nothing else he can do to fix his problems. When I got DayKota he was heading to the meathouse because he had laid down on Ben and Ben didn't want to deal with him anymore. Im just afraid that if I sell him he's going to end up with someone like Ben who wont give him the work and effort that Day deserves. I've givin him so many chances, we used to have our bad days and our good days, but now it seems like everytime it starts out as a good day it ends in a bad day. I don't know what to do anymore, I don't want to let him go, he means the world to me, but somehow I feel like he's holding me back on my riding, in 4h, with showing. I can't take him on trails because now he always rubs me against trees and ends up with me being on the ground, I try so hard not to give up, I really do, I want DayKota to be something someday, I want myslelf to be something someday, I try so hard with him, but its like he's not trying. Like he doesn't care. Im honestly saying I've givin up. I don't know what else there is to do, I don't want to sell him but I feel like its my only choice, I can't do anything else with him, he wont let me..... when I first got him I would say "day if ya don't stop im selling u" but it was just a joke, a saying... now I feel as if that joke is becoming reality, I hate this and im literally crying sitting here typing this out, I don't want to sell him, I know you guys are going to tell me to do whats best for me, but honestly I don't know whats best for me, if I sell him its going to kill me, im not going to know what he's doing, where he's at, or if he's ok, if I keep him, I know whats going on with him, I know he's ok, and he's being taken care of..... I just don't know what to do anymore, should I sell him with a buy back contract??? Should I keep him and try to work everything out?? I've been though so much with him and I don't want to give up on him but I don't know what to do.......... I feel like he's constantly fighting against me... not with me...

Pics go in this order
Me and him at 4h for the first time
1st halter show (color class)
Being curious about the tractor
Ben riding him
Me riding him at bens
First day I met him
First day I met him
First day I met him
Riding him for the first time
First show
Attached Images
File Type: jpg 4h (3).jpg (25.8 KB, 180 views)
File Type: jpg 4h (17).jpg (11.5 KB, 180 views)
File Type: jpg 7.jpg (48.0 KB, 171 views)
File Type: jpg 11292_114147415439347_772947988_n.jpg (51.2 KB, 172 views)
File Type: jpg 181008_114146302106125_1348086646_n.jpg (49.9 KB, 174 views)
File Type: jpg 482664_114147268772695_80817365_n.jpg (40.2 KB, 172 views)
File Type: jpg 557919_114147052106050_1186987624_n.jpg (42.9 KB, 173 views)
File Type: jpg 602040_114147352106020_217581739_n.jpg (38.3 KB, 175 views)
File Type: jpg 574759_114146665439422_2080635153_n.jpg (46.8 KB, 174 views)
File Type: jpg 484976_114146072106148_2104010487_n.jpg (46.2 KB, 174 views)
Sponsored Links
    04-02-2013, 01:50 PM
First bath before show
Attached Images
File Type: jpg day (8).jpg (13.3 KB, 170 views)
    04-02-2013, 01:53 PM
I think it's pretty unlikely that you would be able to sell him. Your wall of text was hard to read, but this is a change in his behavior? If so, I'd have a vet out to find out what caused the change.
horsecrazygirl and Sunnylucy like this.
    04-02-2013, 01:59 PM
Honestly if you sell a horse with that many issues its a liability and in the current market what would you get for him? I would look for a trainer that works with problem horses. And either train and sell or train and keep him.
Sunnylucy likes this.
    04-02-2013, 02:04 PM
Super Moderator
I agree with Alex - horses don't change character for no reason and the most likely cause is some sort of a pain issue that needs to be removed from the list of possibles before you can look at other things
One thought - Do you have deer ticks where you are? They are so tiny they are easy to miss and Lymes disease can cause horses to be in terrible pain and extremely bad tempered without visible signs of illness
Sunnylucy likes this.
    04-02-2013, 02:09 PM
Yep I'd have a vet draw some blood and check him out and a chiropractor as well.

Have you don't any groundwork or does he get aggressive ?
Has his feed changed?
When he runs you into a tree, what happens? How is he running you into a tree? What are you doing to try to make him stop?
How often is he worked, doing what for how long and how hard?

Are there other trainers you could hire?
Posted via Mobile Device
Sunnylucy likes this.
    04-02-2013, 02:16 PM
Ive tried the trainer thing, it didn't work, I know there are more trainers, but I don't have the money to pay for one, I just don't know what to do with him anymore, everytime I try to do anything, he just wont listen, he does what he wants, my mom says its because he has a blue eye(we were told that a horse with a blue eye is harder to work with and stubbourn), but I don't think so, but its not like he went from lovable little pocket pony to what he is now, he was sweet and willing but had his days that he just didn't want to be messed with or do anything but now its everyday and everytime, we had the vet out 2 weeks ago to do checkups and she noticed the difference in him herself before we said anything, but she too doesn't know whats going on, she done some test and all but everything is ok with him. I was wonderin if its maybe the weather that's got him all hyped up?? Cus he started this right around the time when the snow started getting deeper, but now that the snow is melting he is worse.
    04-02-2013, 02:36 PM
First bath before show
Showing off at bens (ben is holding his halter)
Meeting me at the gate first week home
First day I met him
Me, Day, my best friend
Waiting at the gate with the others
Walking around barrels
Attached Images
File Type: jpg day (10).jpg (12.7 KB, 154 views)
File Type: jpg day (13).jpg (16.1 KB, 154 views)
File Type: jpg day (15).jpg (47.2 KB, 155 views)
File Type: jpg day (28).jpg (55.8 KB, 155 views)
File Type: jpg day (35).jpg (53.6 KB, 154 views)
File Type: jpg day (37).jpg (44.5 KB, 154 views)
File Type: jpg day (33).jpg (22.3 KB, 154 views)
File Type: jpg day (40).jpg (23.6 KB, 154 views)
File Type: jpg day (57).jpg (80.8 KB, 154 views)
File Type: jpg edit.jpg (10.0 KB, 154 views)
    04-02-2013, 02:52 PM
I do ground work him, he isn't usually the aggressive type.
No his feed hasn't changed.
When he runs me into trees, well, first off he wont stop when I say whoa or when I pull back, he is trained to dead stop on "whoa" and also to the pressure of the bit when I pull back but he wont stop, and we end up under a tree with him leaning his side into it and trying to get me off, he's even tried rearing under the trees, when I first got him to stop I just said whoa, he stoped and we went the other way away from the trees, then it got to where he wouldn't even think about the trees, we would just walk right past them and everything would be fine. Now he doesn't stop, when I try to turn him away he tries to lay down.
I ride him when I get a chance to, my parents are divorced and my horse stays with my mom(dad doesn't have fence up yet but its getting there.) im with dad on weekends, im with mom during the week and every 3rd weekend of the month. I ride him after school if im able to everyday if the weather isn't to bad(I ride in all weather as long as its not pouring rain, theres a blizzard, or its too hot.) and on the weekends that im with mom. The longest I've ridden him at a time was 3-4 hours, but that was at a show, and he had breaks in between classes. I usually ride him for 1/2 an hr, an hr., to an 1 1/2 hrs. Its not like he's running the whole time, and he's not doing the same thing over and over again, I mix it up so he doesn't get bored with it, sometimes we just ride around the yard, in the pasture, down the trails, and sometimes I practice my speed things.
    04-02-2013, 03:08 PM
Hi OP. You said that the vet did some tests, but you need to tell us WHAT tests have been done, otherwise we are all really fishing in the dark for answers here.

And what about saddle fit? I think you as said that you have used the same tack from the start but this absolutely doesn't exclude that there is pain caused by the saddle.

My suggestions are:

1 give us more information on health history

2 pay the vet to come out to do a thorough work-up to find the cause of this personality change

3 please please use paragraph breaks in your responses. It makes it so much easier to read and I think that you will get more responses too
Speed Racer likes this.

Quick Reply
Please help keep the Horse Forum enjoyable by reporting rude posts.

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the The Horse Forum forums, you must first register.

Already have a Horse Forum account?
Members are allowed only one account per person at the Horse Forum, so if you've made an account here in the past you'll need to continue using that account. Please do not create a new account or you may lose access to the Horse Forum. If you need help recovering your existing account, please Contact Us. We'll be glad to help!

New to the Horse Forum?
Please choose a username you will be satisfied with using for the duration of your membership at the Horse Forum. We do not change members' usernames upon request because that would make it difficult for everyone to keep track of who is who on the forum. For that reason, please do not incorporate your horse's name into your username so that you are not stuck with a username related to a horse you may no longer have some day, or use any other username you may no longer identify with or care for in the future.

User Name:
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:


Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.

Old Thread Warning
This thread is more than 90 days old. When a thread is this old, it is often better to start a new thread rather than post to it. However, If you feel you have something of value to add to this particular thread, you can do so by checking the box below before submitting your post.

Thread Tools

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Hmm, decisions...decisions LOL smrobs Horse Talk 92 02-07-2013 01:23 PM
Had to make some hard decisions. NordicJuniper Horse Talk 11 02-06-2013 01:49 AM
Bitless, hackamore... decisions decisions NBEventer English Riding 4 12-23-2012 01:41 AM
Hard decisions, advice? wild_spot Horse Talk 34 03-07-2011 03:48 AM
Decisions, Decisions! Sporthorse Breeding 2011 Decisions =P NittanyEquestrian Horse Breeding 34 12-27-2010 09:06 PM

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 08:15 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.5
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0