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This is a discussion on help within the Horse Talk forums, part of the Keeping and Caring for Horses category

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        01-29-2013, 03:22 PM
      #11
    Foal
    People have already given you some good advice. I personally didn't start riding until I turned 18 (6 years ago-literally the month I turned 18) and could afford to pay for lessons myself and not have to deal with any liability issues being underage. My parent's refused to pay for lessons for me, and have never helped me pay for any horsey things. They never had a ton of extra money, and they were the type that said I'd grow out of the horse crazy thing.

    If stopping your lessons isn't totally necessary to their finances, what about if you start taking lessons every other week to cut the cost in half? And think about other ways you can help them with money. Any other activities that you're willing to give up that cost them money? Even stuff that uses up their vehicle's gas. Any clothes, electronics, etc that your parents buy you routinely that you can go without? I know 13 yrs old is a hard time to make money.

    If your family really does need the lesson money- turning 16 really isn't that far away. And around here, you can get a real job at certain places when you turn 14 (like fast food restaurants). Being involved with horses is a lifelong learning experience and stopping lessons for a time won't affect that. Look around at other barns to see if they'll let you come hang around their horses/help with chores, which may or may not lead to riding time or lessons. Read and learn from books or online from souces like this forum. See if you can watch other people's lessons at your current barn. Watching lessons is a very good way of learning more. If it's within their means, ask for something horsey for you birthday and christmas. Like some lessons or a paying to go to a horse camp.
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        01-29-2013, 03:27 PM
      #12
    Super Moderator
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Speed Racer    
    What do your parents say about the money for lessons?
    That's a great question. Sometimes parents are willing to sacrifice for the goals of their children and this may be something that is important to them, to be able to give you this.

    That being said, it would be great if you could figure out a way to take the burden off of them and to ensure the other three children in your family are not missing out on something because of your more expensive hobby.

    One thing that you could look into is a "free" lease, which would be someone that needs an excersize rider or someone that is looking to trade a little riding time for some stall cleaning. Alot of times you can find that at a barn or a private home.

    I have a couple teenagers that school a couple of my horses and sometimes I haul them to lessons or shows to kind of thank them for it. I don't ask for money or chores but many people will. Money is obviously out for you but chores would be a good exchange.

    As a teen, I cleaned stalls in exchange for lessons from a private lady....

    Just a thought.
         
        01-29-2013, 03:30 PM
      #13
    Green Broke
    Go find a baby sitting job, post a notice in the local feed store, stalls cleaned call . I worked for my first horse, I babysat, I cleaned horse pens, I mowed lawns, weeded flower beds. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. TImes are tough and are probably going to get worse. Many adults do not have jobs, and are scrimping ot make ends meet. Get creative, find some chore to do for people to get paid. Maybe in a month you will have $$ for one lesson. You will learn to appreciate things much more, if you work for it.
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        01-29-2013, 04:11 PM
      #14
    Weanling
    The benefits should be enough to keep your head well above water. Unless your Dad has asked you to stop, or has implied it, I'd keep doing it (but stay on your Dad's good side - helping around the house Etc haha)

    If he has asked you, maybe you could get a paper round or a small job, like watering an elderly neighbour's plants for a few pounds, and ride maybe twice a month instead of 4 times?

    Hopefully your Dad will get a new job soon anyway, I know times are tough but he wouldn't want you to give up the one good thing
         
        01-29-2013, 05:03 PM
      #15
    Foal
    I think my parents are trying to keep it quiet (about the money) they havnt said anything about horse riding and money, but I think they really want me to stop, they just don't have the heart to say it. Plus if I stop now I think my mum might actually stop pushing me away, I think she blames me for my dad losing his job. As for finding another stables, I can't all the other stables are livery yards! My skills might not decrease but they won't increase I'll have to spend time catching up on things I missed rather than learning new things.
         
        01-29-2013, 05:14 PM
      #16
    Showing
    You need to sit down with them and talk it out, HCG. Otherwise, you're just going off what you think they want, and it may not be that at all.
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        01-29-2013, 05:17 PM
      #17
    Weanling
    Why do you think she blames you for your Dad losing his job? Really, a parent should not blame a child for such things. The economy, surely, is the reason he lost his job. All the recent job cuts, a lot of people have lost their jobs, it isn't your fault! Is there a way that you could start earning your own money? That way they have no say over it (like I said, a paper round, working in a boarding kennels, anywhere that's local) and even if you don't earn much, you could cut your lessons to once every 2 weeks, rather than once a week, that way you won't need as much . Or you could look on Preloved for local people wanting to share a horse in exchange for stable jobs (although these are rare, and you'd need to get one in walking/cycling distance, so as not to rely on your parents) Where are you based roughly, if you don't mind me asking (I don't mean exact location) You don't have to answer that though if you don't want.
         
        01-29-2013, 05:30 PM
      #18
    Super Moderator
    I would have thought there would be some sort of work you could get to help pay for lessons even if not at a riding yard
    I agree you should talk to your parents about this
         
        01-29-2013, 05:30 PM
      #19
    Foal
    [QUOTE=horsecrazygirl1;1868664as for finding another stables, I can't all the other stables are livery yards! My skills might not decrease but they won't increase I'll have to spend time catching up on things I missed rather than learning new things.[/QUOTE]

    Your skills might still increase dealing with a different horse. All horses have something to teach us. Spending time on things you missed will also make you a better ride. I can tell you that from experience. I had to learn to ride all over again with my current horse. It has made me a better rider. I don't think their is anything wrong with that. Riding is a life long process.

    I am not sure where you live but perhaps you could put an add on craigslist or make a sign in the feed store offering to ride someone horse. I know in my neck of the woods their are people always looking for someone to ride extra horses.
         
        01-29-2013, 05:51 PM
      #20
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by horsecrazygirl1    
    I think my parents are trying to keep it quiet (about the money) they havnt said anything about horse riding and money, but I think they really want me to stop, they just don't have the heart to say it. Plus if I stop now I think my mum might actually stop pushing me away, I think she blames me for my dad losing his job. As for finding another stables, I can't all the other stables are livery yards! My skills might not decrease but they won't increase I'll have to spend time catching up on things I missed rather than learning new things.
    You may have said and I missed it but may I ask how old you are?
    And why do you think your Mom would blame you for your Dad losing his job? I feel sure you are mistaken on that.
    Your Mom may be very worried about things so maybe kinda shut into herself and that makes you feel that she is pushing you away?

    I really would suggest you sit down with your Mom and/or with your Dad and tell them how you feel about this. Just ask them also if you need to give up the lessons. If they say yes then it's the right thing to do to help your family through this. If they say no then you can continue to enjoy your lessons without feeling guilt.
    HollyLolly likes this.
         

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