Lol, this is so funny! Let me try:
A spirited arab mare for experienced owners only. Good conformation, an endurance prospect, can move for hours, if you want to catch her. Not suitable as a broodmare. Flashy, although for no apparent reason. One hind leg lame, heart disease and might be blind in one eye. Dislikes other horses, needs breaking to lead, bombproof, but shouldn't be exposed to sudden movements and noises. Aggression and bolting issues have been experienced, so selling to a good home asap. Could be a great kids horse with proper training.
I have come a long way, to surrender my shadow to the shadow of my horse.