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Horse talk for mature people over 40

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        07-13-2013, 04:13 PM
      #11451
    Trained
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by wild old thing    
    sigh...

    I'm so reluctant to involve the head instructor. I feel as though to do this is a lose lose.


    I hate these kinds of dramas and I'm not a fan of confrontation either. I feel as if I can't win this one. ****.
    I guess I would agree with you there
    Don't like drama

    Good luck
    wild old thing likes this.
         
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        07-13-2013, 04:15 PM
      #11452
    Trained
    Just watching the Calgary Stampede
    Earlier I watched show jumping

    Have a great day
    Ladytrails and NickerMaker71 like this.
         
        07-13-2013, 05:05 PM
      #11453
    Started
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by wild old thing    
    I'm going to throw this up here in this forum because I suspect this might be an older person issue. It hasn't happened to me before in this sport but it's happening now and I'm not sure how to procede.

    I'm 66 years old and I take horses and riding seriously.

    I don't know how to handle it without feeling like I'm insulting one of her best instructors. I am asking you older riders because I figure this is an adult thing - that as we get older respect becomes very important. I have always shown this young lady respect and I've always been encouraging to her.

    Last summer, an older man in one of our classes wouldn't listen to this young woman - he would REFUSE to do anything she said. I honestly don't know what the problem was because I hardly ever interacted with her at the time (there was another instructor I usually worked with). But perhaps it was the same thing.

    ADVICE PLEASE.
    I did a cut and past and now my point of view but first are you paying for lessons if so, my responce is this. First find another barn that you can go to if required.

    Next time she has a nasty word to say, respond with. I and people like me pay you to teach us how to ride. You are not doing your job. You are fired. I would then confront the barn owner and complain.

    You are not to be treated or talked to in that manner. This young person would not last 10 seconds where I live. Also, the horse they put you on is sick. If there is a vet report on the horse, I would also point out she is putting you on an unsound horse and that places you in danger. Should she say she has ridden the horse a couple of weeks ago. Hand her the rains and tell her to demonstrate amoungst all of the other horses, how to hold it back.

    Then remind her she is being paid to teach and that requires demonstration.

    Finally I'm rising 65 and your problem annoyed me. I would have told her infront of every one else I am paying for lessons. Don't you ever talk to me in that manner again, and I would stand my ground. She is not an instructer she is a bully. You will do better moving to a new barn but after you dump on her.

    Cheers.
         
        07-13-2013, 05:22 PM
      #11454
    Trained
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Stan    
    I did a cut and past and now my point of view but first are you paying for lessons if so, my responce is this. First find another barn that you can go to if required.

    Next time she has a nasty word to say, respond with. I and people like me pay you to teach us how to ride. You are not doing your job. You are fired. I would then confront the barn owner and complain.

    You are not to be treated or talked to in that manner. This young person would not last 10 seconds where I live. Also, the horse they put you on is sick. If there is a vet report on the horse, I would also point out she is putting you on an unsound horse and that places you in danger. Should she say she has ridden the horse a couple of weeks ago. Hand her the rains and tell her to demonstrate amoungst all of the other horses, how to hold it back.

    Then remind her she is being paid to teach and that requires demonstration.

    Finally I'm rising 65 and your problem annoyed me. I would have told her infront of every one else I am paying for lessons. Don't you ever talk to me in that manner again, and I would stand my ground. She is not an instructer she is a bully. You will do better moving to a new barn but after you dump on her.

    Cheers.
    I would agree here with Stan
    Great advise
         
        07-13-2013, 07:34 PM
      #11455
    Yearling
    Wild thing...I have to agree with the others...although I hate confrontation....you can't let this continue to occur. Curious to the age of your instructor...as the new young teachers often come into school ready to bully is 'seasoned' ones. There is a definite difference in the generations and the respect level. I was taught as I am sure you were, to respect elders.....I'm ain't seeing it.

    Anyway, you are paying for a service, and even if you weren't, you shouldn't be treated in the manner you are speaking. I say either turn her in....tell the head honcho, hey this just isn't working give me someone else....or find another barn. There has got to be others or other instructors.

    Good day today. Did ride Rainn. We didn't ride long....15 minutes or so...but I slowed her down, as she is one who wants to plow thru trails, and we returned home sound!!. She is so with it in the brain, I can't let her sit idol.....I think small short jaunts are the best for her!

    Everyone got clipped today! Wasn't sure how Jay would be, but he.....just stood there!! . What a good boy!

    Saw an old friend for lunch...that's my whole agenda during summer, meet up with people I don't see the rest of the year. had a good time talking to a human being beside DH, mom or mom's DH. Hahahaha I need to get out more!

    Here are a few picks from today...Rainn helping me hold the grooming supplies....she is a sight isn't she??? Bald face, newly growing hair....it's been quite a summer!!
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        07-13-2013, 07:37 PM
      #11456
    Yearling
    After all the grooming, clipping and mane pulling....they do this......look at Rainn in the background, she sits on her bumm and rubs her tummy on the ground to itch....amazing.....
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        07-13-2013, 09:38 PM
      #11457
    Foal
    Hello everyone :) Sorry I have not posted in a while. Finally have a computer virus free, so perhaps I will have better luck downloading pictures. Hope everyone had a safe and great 4th of July... Just a quick update Savannah is coming along well with her ground work. However she now has a buddy:) I just bought a 14 yr old jet black Morgan cross which I renamed Letty Lou in memory of my boyfriend's Mom who passed away when he was 11. She was horse crazy also :) I'm not sure what cross she is, possibly paint, she has one back foot with some white, perhaps as I upload some pictures shortly. I just wanted to say whoever built the new barn, fantastic job, beautiful. Special hugs to all I somewhat know on here, and look forward to meeting those I have yet to know. Have a great evening......
         
        07-13-2013, 10:11 PM
      #11458
    Yearling
    Wild old thing, you need to let go of some your wild, in the instructor's direction! Seriously, you have every right to address how she is treating you. All the others' advice, regarding who you choose to get your hard-earned money, is very good -- and you also deserve to be taught. This young person's approach is not helpful in teaching you....thus she is not doing her job. I think it is fair, and not confrontational, to say something along the lines of "I feel that you don't like teaching me, or that you find it difficult/distasteful/a waste of your precious time to teach an older person. I feel this way because it seems that the things I do well don't get commented on, but the critique that I get during lessons is makes me feel singled out in a very public way, and feels very harsh and personal. My goal for lessons is to become a better horsewoman, and improve my strength and skills in riding. Do you have an instruction plan for me that will help me meet my goals?" If she is a good instructor, she will have this plan in mind and can articulate it in a way that you can agree that it is a good plan or not. She should have an objective (strength to ride in 2 point for 5 minutes) and a series of training steps to get you there. If she is just out to draw blood, her responses will be more on the lines of "you are not xxx enough" which is not a training plan. Then, you can take that information to the head instructor and it gives him/her something to work with in coaching this young instructor. The facility should be reminded that with our good health and healthy pocketbooks, the older generation is "the" new spenders that they should cultivate. I'm sure they wouldn't want to lose the business of the retired generation!
         
        07-13-2013, 10:53 PM
      #11459
    Started
    For sale

    I listed Stella for Sale today in a local internet sales group called Trade Me.

    This is a move I have been dreading. I'm one of those old saps that tend to keep an animal for its life so this is not easy to do.

    009 (2).jpg


    Hey Wild old thing remind the barn there is two forms of advitising. In the news media and word of mouth.
    Word of mouth is the most successfull for positive recomendation.
    It is also the most successful for negative recomendation.

    Move to NZ and I sell you Stella at a reduced price.
         
        07-13-2013, 11:10 PM
      #11460
    Foal
    I didn't have time to read all the replies.

    You, we, pay way to much money and devote way to much time to have some insensitive disrespectful snot mess it up. Really. We pay them to learn. Not to be belittled.

    There are always two sides to every story but her side doesn't matter. Because you are paying for a service she is not providing.

    Hold your head high, remain calm and deliberate and find someone that will work for your money.

    Do you remember the old "Buns of Steele" exercise video's? Yeah, me neither. Good luck, the problem is not you.
         

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