Hi folks, I heard a joke I just HAVE to share:
A parish priest inherited a pet parrot from a deceased parishioner. After he moved the parrot into his home, he was shocked to discover that it cursed like a tinker, loudly and with profanities that would make anyone blush. He set about trying to re-educate his parrot for months, using patience, gentleness and lots of different educational tactics. All this to no avail - the parrot continued to curse loudly on a daily basis.
Then one day, after the priest was particularly embarrassed by his parrot's behaviour (the bishop had just been to visit), he decided he'd had enough, and in a fit of rage he stuffed the parrot into the freezer. He'd been kind and patient all this time, but now he was going to teach that parrot a lesson! And he heard the parrot squawking and cursing raucously from the freezer, and thought, "I'll just wait and see what happens!"
After 20 minutes, the squawking and cursing started to slow down and reduce in volume. After 30 minutes, dead silence. Five minutes after that, the priest decided to have a look in the freezer to make sure he hadn't overdone it. The parrot was sitting rather stiffly and not making a sound. He put it back on its perch, where it continued to sit stiffly and silently.
Ten minutes later, the parrot began to speak. It said: "My dear Sir, I finally perceive I have given you offence, and for this I sincerely apologise. I solemnly promise to utter no further profanities in your house."
The priest was a bit surprised by this, and asked, "Really? You've suddenly come to your senses just like that?"
And the parrot said, "Oh yes, kind Sir, I am very sorry for my past actions under your roof and you will find me a reformed character, one hundred percent."
The somewhat perplexed priest took advantage of the ensuing silence - yes, silence in the house again at last - and began preparing his next sermon. Five minutes later, the parrot cleared his throat. "Dear Sir, I am sorry to interrupt you in your work, but there is something I really need to know... Would you please tell me what the chicken did?"