Horse talk for mature people over 40 - Page 289 - The Horse Forum
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post #2881 of 29437 Old 05-23-2012, 12:21 PM
Foal
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Vermont
Posts: 50
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Hey all! It's been a long time since I've checked in. Just spent the last hour scanning over posts to see what's happening with everyone.

Grace, congratulations! She is just beautiful. I'm sorry about the trailer mishap and hope she will be on her way to fully recovering very quickly.

Country Woman, I'm so very excited for you! Belle looks like the twin sister of the gelding Appy I have been riding in lessons for the last few months. I was never partial to Appys, and was always a draft horse person, but now Apps may be my breed of choice. The stables I ride at have several of them and I am in love with the breed. My appy lesson horse Nuggles has lots of spunk but is also the most sweetest and gentle soul. He is 21 years old. Belle has that same exact look in her eye that I see in Nuggles. When I first saw the pictures you posted of her with her ears pinned, my first thought was "I'd walk the other way so quickly and not turn back." But in the later pictures you posted, what a difference! She loves you. Can totally see it. I hope you are able to ride her soon. Too bad it is dragging on for them to get a saddle. Are you confident to try bareback maybe, just to finally ride her?

Maybe someone will have a suggestion for me. I have come so far in the last three months being back to riding (after nearly 30 years being away from it), had gained confidence, and lost my feelings of fear. I have been doing lessons once a week, and riding independently two days a week (I help at the stables in exchange for being able to ride this much). I was riding a few different horses for a while, but in the last month have used the same horse, Nuggles, because we developed such a strong bond, which borders and the instructors even noticed and made numerous mentions of this. He is always be so happy to see me show up. I groom him each time before riding him. I have learned how to do ground work with him. But the last few times I rode him were disappointing. He spooked one day when I was on him, and never having experience on handling a spooked horse before, I was a huge FAIL. I froze and didn't put in place anything I learned in case of an emergency/spook. I didn't fall off when he bolted with me, but as soon as he calmed down I was done and just had to remove myself from the situation. The anxiety was more than I could handle at the time. The next day that I went back, still feeling terrified, I didn't get the same vibe from Nuggles as I approached him. When I mounted him, he was uneasy, and I could not get him to do anything. The same thing happened the third time. I know it was me, and not him. He knew I was uneasy. I tried breathing and meditating before getting there.

So, this is a long post already, but to make a long story short, I'm back to square #1, feeling like that intimidated woman that I was when starting up a few months ago, and I can't seem to get my mojo back. I want to just delve back into it, but the fright of him bolting with me is always on my mind. I feel I should take a breather for a while, but don't want to be away from it too long either, and end up losing what I have gained.
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post #2882 of 29437 Old 05-23-2012, 12:30 PM
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Harlow Essex
Posts: 7
• Horses: 0
im 40yrs and own a 16 month old gelding I would like to ask what is the legal distance he should be homed from a muck heap any advice welcomed x
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post #2883 of 29437 Old 05-23-2012, 12:38 PM Thread Starter
Trained
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Surrey BC
Posts: 6,589
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I have to get the owners permission first before I ride
I feel confident but my hubby is a nervous Nelly

Country Woman

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post #2884 of 29437 Old 05-23-2012, 01:19 PM
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: NYC and NJ
Posts: 191
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Lost, if you keep on plodding along I'm confident that you will be comfortable again. The same thing happened to me at least once in the past couple of years when I fell twice as I was learning to transition from trot to canter.

If Nuggles is acting different towards you, he is sensing your nervousness. You can work on feeling confident and maybe just walk him in a really safe environment where he's unlikely to spook for a few rides. Or you can switch to a less reactive horse temporarily. Ask for the one they use for dead beginners. Take a step back and try to enjoy your rides.

My experience is that if I challenge myself less for a time, I can rebuild my confidence. I also find it helpful to ask my instructors to help me with techniques that will enable me to handle the situation if/when it repeats.
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post #2885 of 29437 Old 05-23-2012, 01:56 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Vermont
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Thanks Maise for the suggestions,

The first horse they started me on when first beginning lessons there, I got bored with him very quickly and asked to ride one with more spunk and Nuggles was definitely that. I think you're right and that first guy would probably get me to be comfortable riding again. I had been strongly considering purchasing Nuggles (and couldn't wait to change his name too).

I was thinking the same, maybe get into more groundwork with before riding him again to hopefully regain confidence in each other.
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post #2886 of 29437 Old 05-23-2012, 02:20 PM Thread Starter
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Surrey BC
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I like a horse with more spunk, I always have
But now as I am older I am more careful

Country Woman

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post #2887 of 29437 Old 05-23-2012, 03:10 PM
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: NYC and NJ
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I wasn't thinking of Lost permanently riding a less spunky horse. It's just in order to become comfortable again. As an "older" rider, I get more shaken up with falls and near misses. I can't stop pushing myself, but I can back up a bit, look at what skills I need to handle that scary situation and work on those. I also want to look forward to my rides so I try to make sure that I'm comfortable.
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post #2888 of 29437 Old 05-23-2012, 04:05 PM
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Vermont
Posts: 50
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Maise, It is very much the same with me, getting shaken so easily, but even over small things. I was really rising above that for a few weeks and didn't have worrisome thoughts enter my mind when riding Nuggles...we were turning out to be the perfect fit. I have to get back to that mindset. I can't believe the things I'd accomplish riding when I was 17 and wouldn't give it a second thought or flinch. Now I put way too much thought into things

Quote:
Originally Posted by maisie View Post
I wasn't thinking of Lost permanently riding a less spunky horse. It's just in order to become comfortable again. As an "older" rider, I get more shaken up with falls and near misses. I can't stop pushing myself, but I can back up a bit, look at what skills I need to handle that scary situation and work on those. I also want to look forward to my rides so I try to make sure that I'm comfortable.
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post #2889 of 29437 Old 05-23-2012, 04:12 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Vancouver, British Columbia
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I think it may be a good idea to just step back a bit, ride the horse you are comfortable with until you can get back on Nuggles. I wish I had that opportunity, the times are getting farther and farther apart that I get shaken and am afraid to ride Hunter. But they still happen and I just have to steel myself and get on and ride, but for me if I don't then I should just sell him, which I am not going to do.
Just go with what you are comfortable with. I never thought I would get over being afraid of Hunter but now I look back, (Only last year) and I wonder what I was afraid of.
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post #2890 of 29437 Old 05-23-2012, 04:13 PM
Foal
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Vermont
Posts: 50
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Maise, It is very much the same with me, getting shaken so easily, but even over small things. I was really rising above that for a few weeks and didn't have worrisome thoughts enter my mind when riding Nuggles...we were turning out to be the perfect fit. I have to get back to that mindset. I can't believe the things I'd accomplish riding when I was 17 and wouldn't give it a second thought or flinch. Now I put way too much thought into things

Quote:
Originally Posted by maisie View Post
I wasn't thinking of Lost permanently riding a less spunky horse. It's just in order to become comfortable again. As an "older" rider, I get more shaken up with falls and near misses. I can't stop pushing myself, but I can back up a bit, look at what skills I need to handle that scary situation and work on those. I also want to look forward to my rides so I try to make sure that I'm comfortable.
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