Originally Posted by Stan
I also remember the days when a teacher had control of their class, and if any adult frowned on me it would send me home. In other words I knew how to behave. Now the kids don't have respect for them selves, how can society expect them to respect our rights. Now those same children are becoming parents while still children Not a lot of hope for the future if it continues.
My maternal Grandmother, a wise woman, always said "It takes a man and a woman to make a child but a town to make a respecting adult."
Gone are the days when any child caught doing something wrong by an adult was reprimanded and how was it that by the time you got home your parents had already heard about it - when hardly anyone had a phone?
Guilty or not you got a telling off and no excuses were accepted.
Told off or given a detention at school was never questioned as to whether it was 'fair' or not. Complain it wasn't and you were told that life was not fair so get on with it.
I haven't any children of my own but have had many dumped on me over the years. They all benefit from the same treatment as the horses, firm fair consistent and fun. Tight boundaries to start which widen as trust is proven worthy.
Praise is also important.
I set even the youngest children that come here, little jobs, they can hold a hose and fill a bucket (and their boots), little brooms and wheelbarrows and they love to take poop to the muck heap, thanks and praise results in big smiles and puffed out chests. It has probably taken me three times as long and has to be redone but these little ones grow and soon become useful.
Many times I have had problem children come my way. I tell the parent (usually there is only one) that when in my care my rules apply. I will correct bad behaviour or language and warn that if they continue there will be whatever as punishment. That punishment is carried out if the behaviour continues. Then it is forgotten, done and dusted. It doesn't take long before these kids are following like shadows. They need to know where they stand and given the chance, they will prove to be decent people.
Children only have the right to be safe and well cared for with love, they have to earn the right to have a say!
As for bullying, there was no bigger bully than me! In my defence I will say that I would always be a protector, if I saw someone being bullied or an animal cruelly treated, then I would go in defence of that person/animal.
Stan is correct in stating that horses and all animals can give a lot to troubled children, and adults. I had several groups of them come to one of the riding schools I once ran.
One lad, about 13 years was brushing a pony. The pony swished his tail at a horsefly and got the lad across the face. Immediately the lad kicked the pony in the belly. He was stood by the pony's shoulder looking at me when I yelled at him.
The pony looked at me, looked down and moved his foot to stand on the lads foot, immediately putting his weight on that front foot and refusing to move. That lad hollered loud and long before the pony moved.
He learned a lesson, ponies are perfectly capable of revenge and better a toe trodden on than a kick in the gut.
That lad started to skip school to be at the stables. He would be dragged back to school and be back at the stables within a couple of hours. It was quite funny. He was learning more there than at school. His literacy was very poor and I basically taught him to read from comics. The words were phonetically possible, pictures gave clues and no horses unless he read so many pages. It worked. He was not a bad kid, just bad parents and written off by those in contracted to help him. At thirteen he had already had two years of psychological help and basically written off by the woman.
Very few bad children are born, they are made by people around them.