How do I convince my parents about buying a horse? - Page 3 - The Horse Forum
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post #21 of 65 Old 07-27-2012, 01:00 PM
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I'm not trying to be rude here, but trying to bring some things to perspective for you.

Some questions for you to consider...how much do YOU think it costs to own a horse? How much do YOU think it's going to cost YOUR parents per month/year?

Okay, you have board, vet, farrier, worming. What about the unexpected vet bills? The unexpected farrier visits? The show costs if you choose to show? The cost of tack? The cost of show clothes? Training fees? Lesson fees? Gas for YOUR parents driving YOU to and from the barn to ride? Transportation fees to get your horse to and from shows or vet if vet cannot make a house call or horse requires to be moved?

Have you considered the sacrifice YOUR parents would have to make for YOU to have pleasure and enjoyment? I think it's pretty nice of your parents to even let you have lessons. I wasn't even able to take lessons growing up because it was so expensive for our family. I had the PRIVILAGE of being able to ride for about three years (and not consistently).
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post #22 of 65 Old 07-27-2012, 01:46 PM
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Growing up, I asked for a horse for every birthday and Christmas until I moved out to go to college. My parents always said no, that it was a waste of money. The only time that I got to ride was when we would visit my grandmother about once a month.

Now, I'm grown up and have 4 kids of my own. We did get the kids a pony when they were little, but the kids outgrew the pony and three of them lost interest. So, my 2nd oldest has been taking care of the pony by himself for the past few years. He has begged us for a horse that he could ride for sometime now and said that he would pay for the horse and everything else. He saves his money (birthday money and odd job money) and it was possible for him to help out because we own our own land and wouldn't have to pay boarding every month. He has also worked with the pony, who is blind in one eye (due to a birth defect) and mostly deaf. She was a terror, but is now very sweet and very easy to work with.

My husband was against getting him a horse because he quit football and baseball because those activities weren't his "thing" and he figured that this would just be something else that he would quit. But, after seeing how hard he worked, thought that maybe horses WERE his "thing".

So, we thought that he proved himself and we bought a horse for all the kids to share. Now, a couple months later, my son is the only one who does anything with the horse. The other kids quickly lost interest when they realized that their brother did more than just throw food in a bucket for the pony. So, he is now the only one taking care of the horses and he is doing a very good job at it. He also just bought a new/used roping saddle this past weekend with his own money.

So, my advice is to be patient, work hard (save your money) and prove to your parents that you are mature enough to own a horse. Because, I tell you what, the begging didn't work with my son...it was his hard work and dedication that changed our minds about getting him his horse.
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post #23 of 65 Old 07-27-2012, 03:36 PM
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Horses are wonderful for experience. They teach you patience; and about horrible, horrible pain; and tiredness; and sore muscles; how to have and how to let go; how to deal with frustration, anger, heartbreak; how to hate and to love; sometimes you get a little pure joy in there; you learn how to respect nature and hiw to communicate with anither species; they also teach you to give up things like time and money, or show you that those things are more important; they also teach you fear. Horse ownership is a mutifaceted challenge that many people do not understand.
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post #24 of 65 Old 07-27-2012, 03:55 PM
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Enjoy your lesson horses for now. Maybe you could even "share" a horse that someone has at the stable if someone doesn't have enough time to spend with their horse. I was lucky because my parents did get me ponies and then a horse, but things were cheaper then and we had our own small farm. As an adult, I work very hard to have my horses and pay for board, tack, feed, vet, farrier, etc. They are an important part of my life and I think of having them as I do having my children. Their care is my responsibility. They aren't just something fun, they are a living creature that must be provided with everything to keep them healthy, sound and happy. JMO.

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post #25 of 65 Old 07-27-2012, 04:01 PM
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Another thought.
Earning money by working to pay for your horse and saving up for it will also teach you responsibility.
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post #26 of 65 Old 07-27-2012, 09:08 PM
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I bought mine. I was sixteen and working at a walmart type store making $100 per week.

That being said. Get your grades up, do your chores, mind your manners and hopefully it will come... if not.... don't give up on your dreams, just make them happen when you have the finances to do it yourself...
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post #27 of 65 Old 07-27-2012, 09:46 PM
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I was 34 before I was able to get my very own first horse. As someone who did have more than I deserved handed to me growing up, this was not one of them. You have no idea how fulfilling it is to earn the things that you really want and not have them handed to you. Earn it. It'll be well worth it.
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post #28 of 65 Old 07-27-2012, 10:01 PM
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I agree with much of what has been said above - that said, as a mother who has purchased a horse for their child I will tell you what my daughter had done to give me confidence that she was ready for the responsibility and understood the enormity of what was happening.
My daughter had shown herself responsible by doing not just what was asked of her- but those things that she knew needed to be done, without asking. She took on repetitive chores/responsibilities. She showed a commitment to her education by maintaining stellar grades. She exhibited maturity beyond her years in dealing with the situations that had arisen in our lives leading up to the decision to make the purchase. She had created in me a confidence that she would truly appreciated just what she wanted. Most importantly, she didn't whine, demand, nag, etc about getting a darn horse. She knew that I knew what she wanted and she showed maturity in letting it be.
When the time came, she agreed to each and every one of the terms that were laid out as part of the "deal" in her being able to have a horse - education comes before horse (grades were expected to be maintained at the same level they were before horse), the responsibility of caring for the horse was HERS -financing the horse fell primarily on me, so she could "earn" that money by doing the work that came with having the horse (meaning up before school to feed/muck, feed/muck again after school, days when there is not time to ride because you have chores, other chores around the house still come before fun/riding time, etc). She has sought out and done ANY and EVERY 'little job' she can find from age of 12 to now (she'll be getting her license soon, so that will open up her options a little more) and any money she has earned has gone to pay for her horse needs.
I know there are those who still probably believe my daughter shouldnt have been given the horse when she was, but that was a judgement call for ME to make as her mother and she has not caused me to question or regret that call one time in the four years we have had Aero.
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post #29 of 65 Old 07-27-2012, 10:02 PM
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Your parents probably think this horse thing is a passing phase and don't want to commit to a horse if you have a good chance of falling out of the sport in a year or two, which happens very commonly.

A horse won't teach you responsibility. You have to already be responsible to successfully own a horse.

It will take years to prove that this isn't a passing phase, and that you're responsible enough to care for your own horse. And even then, they still might chose not to buy...which is completely their choice and one you should respect.

Until then, be happy with your lessons. Many horse crazy kids don't have that opportunity.
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post #30 of 65 Old 07-27-2012, 10:03 PM
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I guess the summary of what I was saying is - actions speak louder than words. If you want them to think of you as being ready/deserving of a horse - SHOW them that you are exactly that. It will no happen overnight.......and that is part of the challenge, that you show the commitment even when you aren't getting instant gratification!
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