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How do you guys cope?

This is a discussion on How do you guys cope? within the Horse Talk forums, part of the Keeping and Caring for Horses category

     
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        08-19-2009, 11:46 AM
      #11
    Foal
    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Scoutrider    
    You'll always remember Flair, but when you get another filly you certainly aren't replacing her. Scout is my new horse, not my new John. I love him just as much as I loved John, he just has his own "place" in my heart.
    I think that this is a really good point. Just because you get new horse doesn't mean that you'll ever forget the one that left you. There is a quote that flies around all the time about horses "leaving hoof prints on your heart" and I think that's really true. We never forget the ones that leave us, even though we might not think of them quite so often. I think that they would want us to move on, also. They love us like we love them and wouldn't want for us to be sad. *tearing up...*
         
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        08-19-2009, 12:51 PM
      #12
    Weanling
    *cries reading all of the replies*

    Thank you guys so much. It doesn't feel like I would be replacing her, I think it's mostly just like a few of you have said.... I need something else. I HATE going to the barn and not having a baby there. I absolutely hate it. So I'm going to ask my dad if, when the guy he just bought his new yearling from comes here, if my dad would ask the guy to bring his two weanlings, too. If they're not what I want I'm not going to get one, but I've always liked his horses anyway.

    Again, thanks for all the replies. They made me cry.
         
        08-19-2009, 02:01 PM
      #13
    Green Broke
    I'm so sorry for your loss. :( As others have said, everyone grieves differently and only you can decide how to best cope with your loss, but I will tell you what I did. I lost my horse in the same way, to a twisted gut. I had her for 22 years and it was so hard. She, too, suffered a long time while waiting for the vet. Anyway, I bought Stella a month later. Not as a replacement, but because I needed another horse to focus on otherwise, I would have spent all my time energy grieving for Star. Not a day goes by I don't think of her, though, and that was two years ago.
         
        08-19-2009, 02:20 PM
      #14
    Trained
    I lost a horse about 20 years ago and he was THE horse....just ask me I'll tell ya!

    You feel like there is a piece missing because there is a piece missing. Deal with your grief on your own time, every one is different. And it's ALL OK!!!! ((hugs))

    I still get misty eyed when thinking of Kip (aka the bestest horsey in the whole great wide world) and it's OK!!!

    (BTW- Kip was only 28years young when he passed, age doesn't matter...it all hurts.)

    (((SUPER HUGS))) we're here for you and my best advice is to sleep when you can...this includes afternoon cat naps...sleep deprivation is hard on your body and mind, and try to carry on without her. It will be a rough road ahead of you as loss and grief both suck big eggs...but you will come to the end of that road and you'll know when you're ready to get another baby to love.

    Until that time, I have an unlimited supply of internet tissues!!!! Hang in there!!!
         
        08-22-2009, 02:22 PM
      #15
    Weanling
    Quote:
    Not as a replacement, but because I needed another horse to focus on otherwise, I would have spent all my time energy grieving for Star.
    That's EXACTLY how I feel! The guy I got flair from is so nice. He offered to give me a yearling filly he has. I couldn't possibly take it though.... He has no need to do that, but it's way nice. Besides, I like de babies.

    Quote:
    You feel like there is a piece missing because there is a piece missing. Deal with your grief on your own time, every one is different. And it's ALL OK!!!! ((hugs))
    aww. Thanks! *superhugs*


    Quote:
    (((SUPER HUGS))) we're here for you and my best advice is to sleep when you can...this includes afternoon cat naps...sleep deprivation is hard on your body and mind, and try to carry on without her. It will be a rough road ahead of you as loss and grief both suck big eggs...but you will come to the end of that road and you'll know when you're ready to get another baby to love.

    Until that time, I have an unlimited supply of internet tissues!!!! Hang in there!!!
    *uses internet tissues* thanks......

    I'm glad I have you guys to talk to. I don't know how I would feel without it. =)

    So lately I've been feeling like it's getting better, but then someone sent me a card and I just started bawling. I'll post what it says in the memorials forum. It's perfect for that.
         
        08-22-2009, 06:34 PM
      #16
    Weanling
    I am so sorry for your loss. I know all too well how it feels to have to make that heart wrenching decision! It's a very sad time for you, but in a while all your sadness will turn into sweet memories of your precious horse and they will stay in your heart forever! Hugs and here's hoping that you'll feel a little bit better with each passing day!
         
        08-22-2009, 08:24 PM
      #17
    Green Broke
    As I sit here and cry reading all of your posts I can't imagine what your feeling. I think you should do whatever your heart tells you to do. That is your body's way of helping you cope. Keep us posted if you get a new baby, I for one would love to hear about him or her.
         

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