I just need to vent.

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I just need to vent.

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        08-07-2009, 07:39 PM
    I just need to vent.

    There aren't many people my age at my barn, but I managed to find one girl named Emily. We're really super close now and our horses are all but in love with each other.

    Today she told me she might switch barns and asked me if I'd come too.

    See, she has her own horse. Charley. So it wouldn't be a big deal for her. But for me, it would be, considering that my parents don't think "it would be very convinent" for me to get a horse. Convinent? Who ever said that horses were convinent? Grrr.

    Anyways, if I switched, it'd be hard. Right now, with Allegra, I get to ride her whenever I want to and can do pretty much whatever I want with her, even if I'm not taking lessons for a month (Band). If I did switch I'd end up just riding once a week again...

    I don't think she gets how big of a deal it is for me. Another point I made: if I stop riding Allegra, no one will. She doesn't get along with very many people and she can just be a brat, especially if you don't spend enough time with her. She'd go back to sitting in her pen all day, all week, all month without being ridden. Her actual owner and her get along awesome on the ground, but in the saddle they just don't click (which says something, considering that Karena has had her since she was really little and actually trained her (which might be the problem)).

    But at the same time, I don't want to not see her. I'm not sure I would actually end up doing half the stuff I did if I wasn't with her, you know? There's very, very little chance that I'll switch, because what I have right now is so good and I'm not so sure I could find it just anywhere I go. I click with Allegra and, well, everyone's happy that she has a job, not just me.

    The main reason Emily wants to switch is because Karena, who is our instructor, really just is not organized. She said we were going to jump about four months ago and we still haven't. Okay, that's not good, but it really doesn't bug me that much. And she is late for lessons sometimes, but I mean, it's life - not everything goes as planned. Em said that she thinks Karena has done a ton for her but doesn't think she can do that much more. Apparently she wants to get better faster or something.

    I couldn't leave. Karena's really understanding and Jeanette is as well. Jeanette is really understanding about everything and is always willing to drag me along wherever she's going or let me ride Talat or Jasper simply because she was like me once, the whole not having a horse part. Because of this whole experience, when I'm older and have my own horse, I know that I'll be more than happy to take kids who don't have horses on trail rides with me and everything. It's changing my life, even if a lot of people don't see it that way.

    I'm not sure what to do. While I don't want her to leave, she'll be at college in a year or two anyways and I won't see her very often anyways. But why should we miss out on those two years together?

    Ack, sorry, I wrote a lot. But my parents don't understand. My mom knows nothing and my dad thinks he knows everything. So annoying...

    Any advice is welcome...

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