It's like screaming, and no one can hear.

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It's like screaming, and no one can hear.

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  • Loud crack in knee now buckles
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    01-03-2012, 08:15 PM
Green Broke
It's like screaming, and no one can hear.

2011 was a good year. I competed and trained hard, despite my torn ACL. But I can't get over how my 2012/2013 year is going to be. First off, starting July, I have my surgery, then only light exercise (maaaaaybe light riding...) for 6 months. 6 MONTHS. Plus, I'm graduating. So I have to choose a career path, and get my crap together. And, by the looks of it, the job that I thought might get me enough money to actually do stuff during those 6 months might not be there. Why does life have to be so dumb!??
It's like screaming and no one can hear.
And just so this thread isn't totally pointless, I might as well share my short tribute to 2011 video.
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    01-04-2012, 12:01 AM
Girl, you have your whole life ahead of you. You live a in country full of opportunities and advantages that most other peops don't have. Acl surgery is only 5 months of slow down time, that's nothing, use it for intellectual studies. The world is yours, grab it with both hands!
    01-04-2012, 12:06 AM
Yeah my year will be stupid and hard too... but waresbear is right. It's only 5-6 months for you, and then you'll be back in that saddle and better than ever!!! :)
QHriderKE likes this.
    01-04-2012, 12:06 AM
Stop looking at the negatives in life look at what you CAN DO I know this sounds like a pieces of horse poop but that is what I live by it I do not know how to do something I which other people for information and learn then next time I know how -- what is you major in collage -any thing you choose
Kayty and QHriderKE like this.
    01-04-2012, 12:20 AM
Green Broke
I guess I just needed to spit it out. I've just been thinking about all the stuff I'll be missing after my surgery. My grade 12 volleyball year, all of the cattle drives in the fall with my friends and family, my parents are going to have to get other people to help us next year, cause I won't be able to; the fall barrel jackpots I wanted to test run my 4 year old at, I want to really push myself this Spring to teach myself to jump, but to prepare a horse might take longer than me, roping jackpots, and I was going to start my 2 year olds in the fall... but I might just have to get a couple rides on them the week before surgery...

I guess it's just over-tiredness and sick horses getting to me...
    01-04-2012, 02:54 AM
Ppffft my torn ACL (self diagnosed) actually makes me a better rider. :P

Why do I think my ACL is torn (maybe you can help me out since you have been diagnosed and would KNOW)?

Injured it in 2005 during lacrosse scrimmage at my high school... jumped in the air, caught the ball, landed (heard a loud POP) and turned at the same time, shot and made the goal before collapsing (okay not sure what order these events go in, but as I landed, I heard a loud POP in my knee and before I realized it I was on the ground clutching my knee in agony)..

Went home (people carried me off the field), my knee swelled to the size of a balloon.. Did not leave the couch for awhile, evertime I tried to.. (say go to the bathroom) I would end up collapsing if I put the tiniest bit of weight on the leg.

About a week later, I was still swollen, still collapsing.. Decided to go to a knee specialist. He took an X-RAY (Which is what enrages me now, after researching knee injuries, I specifically told him about collapsing on it and the loud POP I heard, and he X-RAYS it..), told me to go on crutches for 2 weeks and I would be fine. Went on crutches for 2 weeks.

First day back at practice, collapsed about 10 times before giving up. I wasn't even going hard, I was lightly jogging. Ended up sitting the bench the whole year and barely put weight on it when I practiced. Stopped playing after that.

Ever since, I've collapsed sooo many times on it just standing around. Once, at a party with friends (playing that game college kids play...) I collapsed standing completely still.. everyone laughed at me, while I was in tears, in pain on the floor crying "its my ACL!".. some friends I have. Several separate occasions, its collapsed in the mall standing online, if I switch legs and lean more on my bad leg than my good leg... it literally buckles and I fall. If I run down stairs, or jump down from something relatively high.. forget about it..

When it collapses it feels like something (a tendon, ligament?) is swishing back and forth over the back of my knee cap... then its severe pain for about 5 minutes or less (it varies), then the whole joint gets really sore and tight..
Also I've noticed, when I stand straight.. my bad knee is much further back than my good knee, like the hinge is broken and nothing stops it from hyperflexion.

It frequently gets stiff/sore/tight and bothers me.

I should probably get it checked out, but I'm so convinced that their either going to say its a minor case and just live with it (as I have been) or that I'll need surgery and I'd rather not.. LOL (I probably should though)

What do you think?

And sorry for rambling.. as for your problems, don't worry everyone gets sad and at least your only taking a 5/6 month long break.. I had a 3 year break (college) and its been really tough getting back into things! While on break, why not write some goals/plans for riding?
    01-04-2012, 02:58 AM
Green Broke
Buck up. You have an open road ahead of you and I envy you. I have over 3 more years on my contract till I can go out and make my place in the world.
Not saying the armys a bad choice, its really good, I have free housing, free healthcare, a steady paycheck, but its not what I want, and its not going to change

Go out and take the world on
    01-04-2012, 07:09 AM
Green Broke
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    01-04-2012, 12:48 PM
Green Broke
Drop your reins, that's definetly an ACL tear, you could have even tore more things in your knee by now. When I first hurt mine, it swelled up, ect. But I got through it and a volleyball season (bucked at least once every practice) but I eventually leaned how to do stuff to avoid pivoting.
drop_your_reins likes this.
    01-04-2012, 01:08 PM
You will get through this. Six months is nothing in the bigger scheme of things. It will also give you time to reflect upon what you enjoy and what you want to do after graduation. You will also be surprised how when one door closes in life, another opens. Don't look down or behind, but keep your eyes up and forward and look for those open doors.

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