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Mare OR Gelding ?

2K views 18 replies 17 participants last post by  HorseLovinLady 
#1 ·
what do you think i should get Mare or a gelding… i’ve had a gelding but i have had too sell him due too personal issues.. and can get another horse in 6 months time but i was just wondering weather i should get a mare or a gelding and what everyones opinions were… as me and my gelding didnt really have a big connection.. what do you think.. also thinking weather i should get an appy paint pinto or grey or white… hmmm choices choices.. can be so hard…




:-(
 
#4 ·
Personally, I prefer mares. Always have, probably always will. That being said, you don't ride gender/color/breed, it all comes down to the individual horse weather it suits your needs, and the connection you get with said horse. You'll search forever (unless your lucky) if you limit yourself to a specific gender, breed, and color. You can't possibly say "ill only get this horse if its x gender, x color, x breed", keep an open mind.
 
#5 ·
Yes that is very true soo i’m considering maybe getting a mare in six months time and try that out and see how my connection it there compared to my gelding… i mean of course i will fine the ONE first.. just hope i do feel more of a connection with a mare thats all.. i really need that special friend.. the friend ill always have to cry on and be there for and whos there for me… someone i can tell anything in the world to and still wont judge me or anything...
 
#6 ·
You mine as well give up the search now if you are going to find the ONE first. It lives with the unicorns and is exempt from human eyes.


How long did you have the gelding before personal issues caused you to part company? Was he yours or a lease horse? Why not lease rather than purchase if that is the case until you find one with a compatible personality to yours and your needs? Will more personal issues arise to cause the same result?

I hope these are questions you have very good answers to before getting back into horse responsibility and I wish the best for you.



Either way, my vote is a gelding.
 
#7 ·
I personally will only own a mare as my personal horse.

Geldings are great and (in my experience) less intelligent than mares, as the rule, though there are exceptions. I've never gotten the competativeness or personality from a gelding that I have from a mare.

I have no problem working with geldings, but my personal horses will be mares because I've never met one I didn't at least click with personality wise thus far in my life. Sure, I'd love to be able to make my horse do what I want, but I find much more partnership with one I can't make do what I want and we have to work together to get whatever it is done.

But, I can't tell you what gender to get, because it's a personal decision. Sure I'll have geldings too, and I may ride them everyday, but the horse I'll have the biggest bond with is most likely going to be a mare. I worked great with Dude, a draft cross gelding, but I had a true partnership with my Pretty Mare that was my lease horse. I have every intention of buying her as soon as I sell my training project..if I can, I made the mistake of getting a mare and already feel a small bond between us after only a month of owning her.

Go look at every horse that sounds like what you want, regardless of gender and choose one.
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#8 ·
Do not limit yourself to only mares or only geldings, it really depends on the horse. Yes, mare have more personality and tend to have that "connection" with their owners but I have found mares to be hit or miss, either you get along great or it is like a chore to ride.

I don't really prefer a gender although I have not had an ounce of trouble out of my gelding but my mare is very stubborn and expresses herself in VERY obvious ways. I think it is more their individual personalities than anything else. That being said I have lucked out with my gelding and both of our mares, I get along great with all of them. I believe it is more the individual horse that should be considered as some people get along with certain horses and not others, even though their personalities are very similar.
 
#9 ·
I wouldn't limit yourself in your search. Consider any horse that seems like it might be a good fit for you whether it's a mare or gelding, Paint or Arabian, bay or cremello :)

When I was horse searching, the only thing I was certain of was that I didn't want a stock type horse. I ended up buying a half-QH who very strongly resembles his QH half. I've had him over a year now and I still couldn't be happier that I got him. I looked at so many other horses, I think if I hadn't gone to look at him just because he wasn't the ideal horse I had in my head I'd still be horse shopping!
 
#10 ·
Don't limit yourself to a color and gender criteria. It mainly depends on what you want the horse for as to what breed to look at. I've had mares and geldings and anymore I don't have a preference. It all comes down to the individual horse, alot of people say mares have more heart. I've had alot of mares and my mare always tried her heart out for me, but my main horse now is a gelding. He gives everything he has every time, my other gelding he's more lazy. Both my geldings are my horses though and I find them alot more affectionate than my main mare ever was. Not saying I haven't had very sweet mares. Just go look at horses who catch your interest without any thoughts of gender stereotypes.
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#11 ·
What everyone else said...

Don't Limit Yourself

My first horse was a gelding who will always have my heart. He tried his hardest for me but never failed to tell me when I was wrong either. I could take him anywhere literally. He was certainly a character and had a sensitive side. He had spirit too but that horse loves me and I him. I have a stronger/different bond with my gelding than my now mare. I can't describe it either. My gelding was my first and I learned everything on him. Our relationship was simple. He was the teacher and I his loyal student. It was never complicated like with my now mare.

With that said my mare is my Heart horse!!! I LOVE that little mare even with all her faults. We have a bond. A pretty close bond but I am her leader not her friend. We have a great working relationship and she will do whatever I ask with very little hesitation. She is very expressive and sensitive too. She loves attention and she comes when called. She loves to be with people though not just me and she really loves kids. When she's nervous or unsure she will stop and ask me what she is suppose to do. She won't spook if I don't let her. She trusts me that much. But she also won't hesitate to let me know if something is wrong. She likes things on her terms and is very impatient (all opposite of my gelding). She is not a teacher. If I don't get it right she will tell me. She's very honest. But I love her for all of this. She is a sweetheart with kids. She's actually a kids lesson horse LoL (but she's very different with kids too)

So don't limit yourself and don't settle either but keep in mind you could completely miss out on your heart horse if you start putting limitations on your search. So look at every horse in your price range and you never know what you'll find.

Just to add I have friends who all mesh and bond with their horses differently. All are very unique bonds. Each bond will always be different. No two are alike. Good luck :)
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#12 ·
As all the others have said don't limit yourself.

I've met mares that are dull and boring and want nothing to do with people, and geldings that are full of life and live in your pocket. One person where I keep my horse has this great gelding so full of personality and so close to her.

You don't just meet a horse and have a connection, not usually. It takes about a year for you to really get to know each other. There is no "one", there are just horses that are friendlier than others and that you put the time and effort into getting to know. Some human and horse personalities will "click" better, but otherwise its all down to working at it.

I don't think that there is any huge difference with mares. They are more "sparky" and perhaps more intelligent, but they're often more distracted as well. Each mare and each gelding is different.

Now this may seem a little harsh but maybe you should try to be a bit realistic about horses. A horse isn't a "special friend". Everything you want to feel with the horse, someone who is there for you, someone not to judge you, someone to cry on - that's all in your head. The horse does not feel that. Horses don't work that way. People feel those things. And even if you're lonely and sad, whether you talk to a horse, a cow or a rock even it doesn't make a difference - it's still all on your side. So when looking for a horse and a horse connection realise that they are not human. Nor are they human centric animals like dogs. The bond isn't going to be like that of another human, or even a dog.

I'm just concerned that you're looking for something you can't find.
 
#13 ·
I personally prefer my geldings. They are the same horse every time you see them. No bouts of marishness, no drama... Our barn pastures the boys and girls separate and it seems the boys ( while having the usual horse issues ) are kind of chill, The girls, on the other hand, always look like high school! LOL... You can almost hear them whispering about the other ones!
As for expecting your horse to be your best friend... hopefully you are not setting yourself up for disappointment. Some horses are more perceptive to moods than others, but to expect your horse to say "oh no! SHe is having a bad day. Let me go over and nuzzle her..." is not realistic. And to buy a horse, then find they dont fill that need for you is not fair to the horse. It is not like you can tell them " I really need you to be here for me today" and expect them to understand. Find a horse that is respectful, and takes what ever affection you want to bestow on them willingly, and dont expect more. Anything beyond that is a bonus, emotionally.
 
#14 ·
I ADORE my mare.
When I was horse shopping last year, I told my trainer - ABSOLUTELY NO MARES! - There was only room for 1 b*&% in this relationship and it was me ;) After riding what seemed like a hundred geldings, he finally convinced me to try my girl.

Its only been a few months, but we've bonded more in that short time than with any gelding I've ever had. When I call to her from the parking lot, she calls back. She gives kisses and great hugs. She works SO hard for me every day and I honestly believe she would jump in front of a bus for me.

At first I didnt believe what people said about Mares, but its true - though they can be a bit b*%$-y a few days a month, once you've earned their trust and bonded to them, its one of the most rewarding experiences you could ever have with a horse.
 
#15 ·
I have had both and I personally like mares because of their bad rap and stereotype. For example, this beginner lady (who thought she knew way more than she did) came to try out the horse my instructor was selling and I heard her say "we don't have any mares at my barn, I can't believe any one would want one". She was extremely over horsed on my instructor's gelding but saw me riding my little grey mare and started commenting "now THAT's a good horse" Fly changed this lady's whole perspective on mares.
 
#18 ·
I am a firm believer that personality depends on the individual horse. I've met great and not-so-great mares, geldings, and stallions. I, personally, wouldn't over look a horse just because it is a gelding or mare.

That said...

I don't know why, but can't seem to get away from mares! Most of my lesson horses, my former lease horse, now my own horse have been mares. My best rides have been on mares and therefore mares have taught me the most. Some seem to get moody during "that time" but many do not... in fact I've only come across one that was moody during that time.

And I can't prove it, but it just seems like mares have a little extra spunk to them. Or maybe that's just my sense of girl power...:lol:
 
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