Me? Mad? No. Never. Trainer issues. - The Horse Forum
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post #1 of 11 Old 05-20-2012, 02:01 AM Thread Starter
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Me? Mad? No. Never. Trainer issues.

For the past three weeks everyday weekend I have asked to go trail riding or to a show. Each time my trainer has made up excuses or said the one place is 'too far'. Last show she took her other two students to a show that She knew i wanted to go to. When i asked again about it she said, no you have to find your own ride. Im taking "" and "". So I got left out of a good show. So recently she has taken them on three trail rides, not telling or asking me and took them. Today she took them trail riding to the trail I --have always asked to go to, and she has said no, its too far. -- So I am peeved. She keeps playi g favorites. I know most of you will think or say 'but you do need to find your own ride' and stuff but note, Shes one of those trainers that want to be there for shows and stuff. We always pay gas and extra for her time. I just dont know anymore. -.-
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post #2 of 11 Old 05-20-2012, 02:19 AM
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My boss did that to me.. took other people on trail rides but never me. I hurt and was frustrated.

I think you should find a trainer that is willing to work with you and actually take you to shows. That's what I would do.

"Strength is the ability to use a muscle without tension"
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post #3 of 11 Old 05-20-2012, 03:00 AM
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Maybe she thinks you're not ready for that, but if that's the case then she should tell you to your face. I agree with sky, find a new trainer that supports you and helps you grow as a rider

Satin Reign aka "Misty"... my life, my love, my everything.
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post #4 of 11 Old 05-20-2012, 03:28 AM Thread Starter
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I dont think thats it. Ive been riding with her since i was 5. Im now 17. Ive riden almost everything and any age. The other two girls are my age and 13. Who the other 17 year old has been riding for 4 years, the other one for three. :/
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post #5 of 11 Old 05-20-2012, 03:48 AM
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My ex trainer did stuff like to me. Her daughter and I wanted to do this Halloween costume show and I wanna to do a W/T class as well. Well we talked about our costumes (Shaggy and I were gonna be hippies and her daughter and the mare she rode were gonna be princesses) and I put all this work into mine i made a shirt for me and these daisy flower things for Shaggy's mane and tail. The only thing her mom had to do was ask her (now ex) husband to took up the tailer and because they were fighting she wouldn't do it so after all that work we didn't get to go to the show. I actually cried cause it would have been my first show and i was so excited! and then the second time she pulled this crap her daughter and I were riding and she came up to the barn and started telling her daughter stuff to get ready for the show that weekend and I said "Theres a show this weekend?" and she says back "yeah did you wanna go?" and i (in my head) was like really you weren't going to tell me?!?! if i hadn't gone to the barn that day i never would found out about the show and thats not the worst she wouldn't work with me to help me get ready seeing that i had never been to a show before(still haven't) for 3 days i asked for help because the friday before show was relay for life and i wouldn't be able to come to the barn then. So basically she came to the barn once that week to help me. I honestly think she was afraid i would beat her daughter since we would have been showing in the same W/T class. Im not trying to brag but shaggy is a much better horse than the mare(honestly i think it was more the rider then the horse herself.) he listens better for one thing. I never ended up getting to go to that show either because it got rained out but i guess it was good thing cause i have feeling it would have been a disaster. Funny thing she they moved to NY so now I have the place to myself besides the really nice grandparents (ex trainers in laws) that live there.

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Last edited by shaggy; 05-20-2012 at 03:54 AM.
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post #6 of 11 Old 05-20-2012, 04:03 AM
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Maybe you should talk to her?
Just ask why she is taking these other girls to trails and shows and not you?
Ask if there is any reason.

Maybe something happened that your not even aware off.
If you dont get a satisfactory respose i would consider finding a more supportive trainer also.

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post #7 of 11 Old 05-20-2012, 09:28 AM
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Boy, life sure would be a lot easier if people would just be DIRECT and HONEST.

Obviously, the trainer is making up bogus reasons and outright lying hoping you'll get the "hint". Problem is - you don't have any idea what the trainer is "hinting" about.

Maybe that's the way to approach it? Ask the trainer straight out if something is wrong.

Leasing a spoiled rotten trail horse...pretty - but a brat!
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post #8 of 11 Old 05-20-2012, 09:44 AM
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I completely agree with asking her straight up about it. Especially being such a long term client, she most definitely owes you an honest answer.

If she didn't have a good answer, I'd be looking for a new instructor that truly wants to help you be successful with your horse.
Cat, HagonNag and bsms like this.

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post #9 of 11 Old 05-20-2012, 10:48 AM
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I agree with everyone else so far. Ask her straight out what is going on and if you don't feel comfortable with the answer given it might be time to look for a new trainer. It may be that you've been there so long she is taking you for granted as a client and feels she has to cater to the newer ones. Bad way to do business but it happens. Maybe realizing she may lose you as a client will get her to give your business the proper focus it deserves.

All I pay my psychiatrist is cost of feed and hay, and he'll listen to me any day!

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post #10 of 11 Old 05-20-2012, 11:29 AM
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Yeah, just put your cards on the table. Ask her point blank why she is leaving you out of these situations. If you still cannot get a straight answer or worse get an earful of BS, find another trainer. No sense wasting your money and time on a horse that you cannot do anything with.

You just have to see your don't have to like it.
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