my horse died today... and i have no idea what to do next. - The Horse Forum

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post #1 of 28 Old 05-16-2013, 10:47 AM Thread Starter
Weanling
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: South Africa
Posts: 537
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my horse died today... and i have no idea what to do next.

I posted this on a local forum today, and just don't have the strength to retype it, or to write anything else right now, so just copied and pasted. Please feel free to ask for more details. I just can't think that straight right now.

Hi all... well I am writing to you here from an incredibly low and broken down place. One of my horses died today, she broke her leg apparently running about, playing, and hit it against a lone wooden post I had planted for a fence I couldnt finish.

She was an adopted horse, and after years of putting everything I could into her... several hospitalisations due to the neglect she suffered before I got her... fattened her up, and she became my favourite. And now she's gone and it's all my fault.

I am finding so difficult to cope... but on top of that... I cannot even bear the thought of keeping my other horses anymore. I am so scared that somehow they come to harm through something I did too. It seems like it just isnt meant to be for me.

I need to find homes for them. I don't know what to do currently. I am just so broken.
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post #2 of 28 Old 05-16-2013, 10:50 AM
Showing
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Saskatchewan
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I didn't want to read and run, so big hugs to you.

Horses are accidents waiting for somewhere to happen, and they are so fragile for such big guys.

You are in shock, take a few days to adjust and stop with the what ifs, if you made a mistake, learn from it, and move on.
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post #3 of 28 Old 05-16-2013, 10:58 AM
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Cariboo, British Columbia
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Condolences for your loss & do not blame yourself, you gave that horse a good life. Give it some time before you make any decisions, strange things happen and we have to learn from it and move on.
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post #4 of 28 Old 05-16-2013, 11:00 AM
Green Broke
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Missouri
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Horses are accidents waiting to happen. My horse broke his shoulder within 15 min of being put outside in the morning, no idea how. Was it to muddy that I shouldn't have put him out? Should I have fed hay outside to keep him from running? Should I have stayed and watched him? You will drive yourself crazy with what if's. You gave him a great life and you didn't let him suffer. That is a whole lot more than a lot of people would do, sad as that is, it is true.
Wait and see how you feel in a week or a month. You will be surprised that the rest of your horses will give you such joy that you won't be able to believe that you ever thought of getting rid of them. They won't hold an accident against you, and neither should you.
Sorry for your loss, It is a pain that your other horses will help heal.

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago, the second best time is today.
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post #5 of 28 Old 05-16-2013, 11:07 AM
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I agree with the others. This was a tragic accident, and I am so sorry for your loss. Please don't make any major decisions right now, about anything. When you've had time to grieve and process, and start thinking logically again, then you can decide what you want to do. My heart goes out to you.
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post #6 of 28 Old 05-16-2013, 11:11 AM
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I am so very sorry for your loss. It is not your fault . HUGS
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post #7 of 28 Old 05-16-2013, 11:34 AM
Green Broke
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
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I hope you allow yourself a time to grieve before making a decision that will effect you and the horses for a long time. Go through your grievance then decide what is best for you and the horses when you can think about it rationally.

Sorry you are having to go through this and know that each of us as horse owners have to find ways on carrying on even with the threat of that happening to one of ours. You will find a way to see the path that is meant for you when the time is right.
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post #8 of 28 Old 05-16-2013, 11:36 AM Thread Starter
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: South Africa
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Golden Horse View Post
I didn't want to read and run, so big hugs to you.

Horses are accidents waiting for somewhere to happen, and they are so fragile for such big guys.

You are in shock, take a few days to adjust and stop with the what ifs, if you made a mistake, learn from it, and move on.
Thanks Golden Horse. About six years ago my childhood horse/heart horse, and my sisters' two ponies died when the tree they were standing under was hit by lightning. That was a month or two after I moved out of my parents' for the first time, and the guilt about not being there, and not being able to do anything, took years to fade away.

Now, just as I've had to relocate again, it happens again. It's hard for me not to see something on this telling me I will always fail at this. I'm so scared now, for my other animals.
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post #9 of 28 Old 05-16-2013, 11:38 AM Thread Starter
Weanling
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: South Africa
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Thanks everyone else too, when I started writing my above reply, only Golden Horse had posted yet. Just shows what I mess I am.
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post #10 of 28 Old 05-16-2013, 11:48 AM
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: MD
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I'm very sorry. It's very hard to lose your friend.

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass: it's about learning to dance in the rain..."

"When we are no longer able to change a situation - we are challenged to change ourselves."

"How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours."
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