I actually came over here from your other post about your significant other insisting he come with you to the barn now.
I don't know how much advice I can offer, but I can definitely share some experiences that seem similar. I know what it's like to struggle with anxiety and depression. I was in an emotionally abusive relationship once and I had contemplated for the better part of a year that he perhaps wasn't right for me, but it literally took me that much time to build up the confidence that this wouldn't also send me into a crazy spiral. There's always a ton of uncertainty, especially in love and relationships and having to deal with anxiety, etc. adds just that much more. One thing I remember thinking though, after being publicly humiliated by him yet again, was how terrible would my life be without this person? Would it be tough? Definitely. Unbearable, unlivable? Probably not. My honest thought is you have already, deep down, made up your mind about this person and have come on here for reassurance that you are justified or thinking of making the right decision; whatever that decision might be, I wish you the best.
One other thing that I would suggest is important is to also make sure you have a strong network of friends/family outside of this person. This kind of thing sucks no matter what, but it sucks less when you have others to help you along.
Again, it's hard to offer really definitive advice on an online forum, but I wish you the best.