Help, this problem is depressing me and almost driving me to sell my horse.
I bought my current horse 1 and a half years ago from people at my agistment place who still have other horses there. At the time I thought it was convenient, my new horse didn't have to change paddocks, leave his horse friends and could stay in touch with his owners. At first I appreciated their advice on feeding, habits likes/dislikes, but they haven't stopped controlling and have been very critical of everything I have done.
I am giving him excellent care in fact he is in much better condition in every way than when I bought him and has much equipment now, before his rugs, tack etc were old, torn, ill fitting etc and he was neglected with regard to riding, just standing in the paddock looking bored.
The owner questions everything I do - I live next door to the agistment and she will knock on my door when she arrives to see her horses, asking have I fed him (l always feed him early in the morning,) which rug am I planning for him today? Have I cleaned up my paddock yet (I had ,there was one new poo from my horse). She constantly tells me I am not riding him enough and keeping him fit yet she sees me on him out 3-5 times week. He is quite senior and when I bought him it was understood he was retiring from competition and for pleasure riding only.
When I ride him she will sit and watch and criticise me the whole time which makes me nervous. She then tells me I am too nervous and ruining him, his behaviour has deteriorated. This lady never rides her own horses who are overweight and very bored.
She will often give him a complete meal when she arrives 2 times a day even though I say I have just fed him and I am standing right there. The other day she haltered him, took him for walk, washed him while I was sitting outside my house, having completed his ride, feeding, care etc already. On a number of occasions I have arrived home after work with a lesson booked from my instructor to find him fed and rugged at 3pm in the afternoon, with the previous owner saying Oh you were late and he was hungry. Other owners there are annoyed as their horses are fed and rugged before they arrive in the afternoon, ruining their plans. This lady is not the manager just another owner, but is critical of every other owner there.
I have asked her to stop feeding him as my feed is going way too fast and he doesn't need it. She says it is very hard as he "looks miserable" and is neglected.
It is time I had a big showdown with her, however at times we depend on each other eg if I am away for a night I ask her to feed him. Likewise I take care of her horses if she is stuck. However I am feeling increasingly depressed about the whole situation. I am thinking about new agistment, but as I live right on site it would be very inconvenient for me.