So it wasn't horse related at all. But I was married twice, my first MIL hated me, my second loves me. For sure there is a personality difference between the two - but what really changed was me. I was walked all over by my first MIL, and by the second I was my own person.
But in that, there is something in you, what are you willing to stand down on. For me, I never cook, and yet I cook every holiday meal with the MIL that loves me. Outside of horses, I do all the duty things I should do. And so it pays off.
I think for you, there is some middle ground outside of horses, do it.
It doesn't sound like you want a war? So where was your Easter meal? Who did what?
I am asking this because I have been there, and there are two sides to every story.
Well yes, we do get along on other things. Easter she cooked, and I was in charge of eggs, coloring eggs, the egg hunts AND all 5 kids. We get along with other things.
And KountryPrincess, no really a need to get upset. The reason they are called a RANT is bc the person is RANTING! They are upset over something and there is so many things they are thinking that it's hard to put everything down sometimes. It helps to get it out though. Sometimes is something that has been going on for a little while AND there have been many occasions that upset the poster. So it's hard to tell it all without writing a small novel. Like AlexS and LynnF... they didnt understand, but they read (sort of like listening online, I guess, lol). That is all alot of us really need...is to vent!
And Saskia I really dont fall off my horse alot, and it isnt just one horse. As I said I do have a short leg on one side, but I do rather well. I can canter bareback, and with saddle and my horses are really well behaved. My horses are young also, so they spook sometimes. I have only went off twice, in a one year. And it was the summer my mare was first put under saddle. And even then, I didnt get seriously hurt, just really really sore. I think it kind of depends on the horse your riding, and how much riding your doing, and what skill level and experience you have at any one activity. Any other fall I talk about is the goofy falls that happen. Like jumping on my mare bareback kicking her butt then sliding off the other side, lol... I PUSH myself and her and my gelding, to try EVERYTHING! So my first time jumping a horse EVER, and my mare's first time jumping with a rider, didnt go so well the first try! I fell off, lol... but I was fine, and my mare didnt intentionally get rid of me. She had a jerky jump bc she is young! And it was my first time on a jumping horse! The second and third and forth jumps, NO PROBLEM!
So no, I dont think I'm a bad rider or she is a challenging horse. I think I put us in challenging situations. I spend alot of time riding with trainers and experience horsewomen who say I just need to relax and get confidence, which I have began to do this year! And I like to try new things, and I'm not getting hurt, and my mare is very forgiving especially for a young arab.
But Saskia, why wouldnt you try to make it a little easier on your uncle's wife? I know it's hard if you dont like her, but if you have empathy to see what she is going through, maybe you can try to help her feel accepted. None of my business, but maybe seeing a member of the family accept her may affect everyone else.
I was talking to my husband though, and he just thinks it's bc I do things with my horse that she is too old to do now. And I have actually heard her say that. Which I totally disagree with! So i think I'm going to try to get her out to some horse shows with me this year! She would o last year, so I stopped trying, but maybe I can this year! Sound like a good plan?
I'm excited about it!