I keep my horse at a very nice, spacious, eventing [but most people ride dressage] facility. It's an awesome farm, lots of pastures, 4 arena's, friendly people etc.
I have 2 riding instructors. The barn owner teaches me, and when she's not around another woman who helps run the barn does. The barn owner scarcely teaches my lessons anymore [usually she's at a show with her riding team] so it's mainly been the other woman. She's terrible.. all the boarders who take lessons with her decided about 6 months back that it was pre wedding stress [she was engaged] and we were all understanding. Now she's been married, for a while, and has not gotten better.
She's straight up nasty sometimes, she gives off the worst vibe ever. I'll use me as an example, but a lot of other people who ride with her have similar complaints. I got on today, relaxed, warming my horse up with no problems. It was gusting winds to the point where the barn sounded like it would fall over at some points so my horse was an eensy bit spooky but we weren't having and real issues we were both relaxed. The first thing she says to me when she walks in? She loudly in an irritated tone tells me "Don't make a problem out of anything that doesn't need to be a problem.." What happens she she says this? My horse spooks in a side canter off of the rail. Now I'm not saying it's her fault, but bare with me as the store goes on.
So I'm riding around after the spook, things are still going decent although my horse is a little more alert [ears pricked, neck curled] and she notices I'm not keeping my left leg quite and my left hand is in front of my right. She asks me to correct it, so I try with all my might to stop my incredibly weak left leg still and I slide my left hand back and down. She does not see a change and asks me again. I try even HARDER to keep my left leg still, slide my hand back even more and down [now it's getting close to crossing the knee roll of my saddle..] she STILL isn't happy and resorts to raising her voice in an unpleasant annoyed tone. I'm getting pissed and my horse is sensing it, he's starting to get nervous and trying to duck out the corners where the wind can be heard even though he wasn't doing this before. This was my fault as I was getting tense, tense because of my instructor, but I was still trying with all my might to satisfy her requests and working on my leg and hand position.
She STILL isn't satisfied, and resorts to shouting at me. "WHY, TELL ME WHY YOU'RE MOVING YOUR LEFT LEG LIKE THAT.. I DON'T GET IT.." and I very calmly replied [although VERY upset at this point] that "I'm trying really hard I'm really trying.." she told me "No you're not and if you're not going to listen what's the point in having your lesson? I can just leave right now.." at this point I was in tears but CONTINUED to try and please her requests in every way even though I was almost crying. I just kind of shut her out the rest of the lesson and dismounted.. defeated..
Now I ride my horse every day of the week, have excellent rides where we have great communication and everything goes good. Then I have my lesson with her, and I feel like I can't ride to save my life and that what's the point in trying? I know I'm not perfect and I have errors to correct but she makes it seem like I'm BLATANTLY ignoring her!
So I left the arena, put my poor, fried horse back in his stall, and then found a pow-wow of other girls and boarders who ride with her, all saying the same crap! That her attitude even translates to their own horses who are more confident than mine.
I don't want to ride with her anymore, but I don't really have a choice, cause the other instructor isn't their all the time and I can't pick and choose who I get to teach but this is so frustrating. Every time I ride with her I have a god awful ride and I'm not the only one. I've tried asking her questions [to which she replies in a manner that makes me feel stupid] I've tried calmly explaining to her that I'm trying, and I've tried just keeping my mouth shut. Nothing works.
Do you guys think I'm wrong to not want to ride with her anymore? What should I do? Every time I ride with her I feel like I take a step back instead of forward..