Need some Moral Support..... - Page 4 - The Horse Forum
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post #31 of 39 Old 08-16-2012, 09:22 PM Thread Starter
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Yeah, it's just that I've had dreams flip and change before. But, I just feel differently about's a dream that I feel like I'm just striving to complete because I'm totally afraid that my goals and dreams will be lost. And sadly it's to the point where it is my worst fear ever. Now when I'm around horses I'm too stressed about savoring the moment and time with them I end focusing more on the "I don't want my dream to slip away" than the enjoyment of just being around the horse. I hope no one is thinking I'm crazy or something it just stresses me out. I feel that I just need to cool off before I burn out.
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post #32 of 39 Old 08-16-2012, 09:37 PM
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As someone who went through engineering in 4 years and with an honours GPA while riding as many as 2 horses and working I can tell you that it is possible.
I quit work to go back and get a MSc in engineering and am currently trying to qualify for national level high performance funding, competing internationally and riding 1-2 horses every day. The U pays me a small salary so I am not working for this degree.

A lot of it is finding support in the places you can. My parents and now my boyfriend have both been huge sources of support, as well as learning how to budget, save and scrape, where to get scholarships etc. The project I am working on right now is nationally funded and industry supported which has bolstered my salary to a comfortable level for the length of the grant.
Student loans may also be a possibility to look into.

I did my first year of engineering "horseless" and was bored out of my gourd and out at the barn every night anyways. Try a semester without horses and then see how it pans out.

As far as for right now, leasing may very well be a good option for you and keep saving your money. Also don't have your heart set on mechanical - mining engineers get to blow stuff up :) and travel to way cooler places.

Good luck!
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post #33 of 39 Old 08-16-2012, 09:48 PM
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Originally Posted by Horse racer View Post
I don't want to sound like a bratt, I love my parents a lot. I just feel really down in the dumps and feel like my dreams are crushed....I just need some support. Anyone have this happen, or have gone through this? Or anyone have any advice?
from your post I am guessing that you are a similar age to my 17y/o daughter...this really is not a horse issue. I will tell you the same thing that I have told my own daughter. At this stage in your developmental life it is your job to break away from your parents thinking...become your own person if you will. Its part of being a teenager about to become an adult. You love your parents but they drive you nuts because they don't think the same way you do. Guess what its so normal!! Your parents want you to grow in to a happy, successful adult. They don't want to squash your dreams. Sometimes we (the parents) try to use our own life experiences to try to guide you (the teenagers) to make choices that may, in our opinion be better, more responsible ones. We try to mentor through stuff that could affect your life in a major way. We don't always know the best answer and we certainly can make mistakes but our intention stays the same....we want our kids to be successful & happy in what ever they do in life.
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post #34 of 39 Old 08-16-2012, 10:03 PM
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I would like to add in my two cents. Owning a horse is EXPENSIVE! I was lucky enough to have my parents support me financially when I was in high school, I chose a horse instead of a car so they bought me my sweet arab Roo. Well, I graduated high school, started working, and took over all his expenses. Wow, I gained a new appreciation for everything my parents did for me, to let me have a horse! I had NO idea how much everything added up.
It isn't easy working minimum wage jobs and affording a horse, plus rent, car payments/insurance, cell phone, gas money, food, etc, etc. I am so lucky and very thankful that my parents bought me my boy, I love him to death, but have many times gone without things I wanted to pay for him. I've always been surrounded by friends who drop money on clothes, restaurants, movies, constantly. I have never been able to do that, because of my responsibilities. Roo has cost me several thousand in the last year in vet bills alone, not including feed, farrier, and board. I do have to admit, my life would be much easier without having a horse of my own! But I love him and that makes it all worth it. I'm starting school in spring, and it will be even harder to afford everything, because I won't be able to work as much. So I guess I'm just trying to say, I can bet just about anything that you have no clue how hard it is to afford a horse. It takes a lot of sacrifice. I definitely wouldn't begin your college life with a horse. See how the first year or so goes, and then decide if you want to buy a horse. You can always take lessons somewhere, or lease a horse, if you want to be around horses.
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post #35 of 39 Old 08-16-2012, 10:33 PM
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You cannot let people affect your way of thinking. I am a strong believer that if God wants it to happen for you, and you are aware of and open to that possibility, it truly will happen. But the thing about horses is not everyone understands that passion and that love. You have to just realize that as hard as it can be sometimes, you need to fight for that dream. God bless!!

God bless, englishaqh (:
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post #36 of 39 Old 08-16-2012, 11:36 PM
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Originally Posted by Speed Racer View Post
We can't in good conscience tell him, 'Oh yes! That will work out GREAT!', when we know that being responsible and patient will bring more rewards than instant gratification.

You don't get moral support if you need to be reminded that what you want may not be the best thing for you at the time.

As an adult, albeit a young one, I'd think you'd know the reasoning behind it.
Im 29. I guess thats "young" to some people. I had to work very hard and be very patient. I did not say that having a horse NOW was a great idea. My point simply was that everybody was lecturing without stopping to consider how hard it was to understand when they were young kid. There's nothing wrong with pointing someone in the correct direction. Im pretty sure that the op's "moral support" was to remind them that though it may take quite some time, it is still possible.
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post #37 of 39 Old 08-17-2012, 12:04 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by englishaqh View Post
You cannot let people affect your way of thinking. I am a strong believer that if God wants it to happen for you, and you are aware of and open to that possibility, it truly will happen. But the thing about horses is not everyone understands that passion and that love. You have to just realize that as hard as it can be sometimes, you need to fight for that dream. God bless!!
I have had that same mind set for a while. But there's a difference between a dream and a goal. A dream is something that we always think about but is usually unreachable. I dream about being very rich and marrying a super model...haha is that going to happen, probably not, no. A goal is something that you strive for and know you're going to complete no matter what it costs and no matter how much effort. Being a horse owner and enthusiast is my goal. Not my dream, but my goal. I like your advice anebel, I pull a 4.0 grade average in school. I'm hoping I'll get good scholarships and be able to afford a horse. But we'll the school I'm planning on going to (Washington State University) isn't incredibly expensive. The tuition isn't too bad of a price.
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post #38 of 39 Old 08-17-2012, 12:34 AM
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In no way was I or anyone else trying to dash the OP's hopes and dreams. We were just all trying to explain that sometimes you have to give up that immediate gratification for a much larger dream. Sometimes that is hard for young people to grasp. Heck, sometimes it is hard for all of us.

OP, I completely understand how you feel about being afraid that your dreams aren't going to happen. My most recent goal is to get my horses moved to my own house. Sometimes I let negative thoughts creep up and think something is going to happen to mess it all up. You and I both want our dreams so badly that we are going to make them happen. There will be bumps in the road. That is a given. As long as you keep your goal alive and strive to reach it, it will happen for you. I can feel in every post that you type just how much you want it and I think you will work very hard to make it happen. It will happen for you....not because you thunk it up, but because you are going to work hard to see that it does.

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post #39 of 39 Old 08-17-2012, 02:41 PM Thread Starter
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yeah, I definatly feel better now about the whole situation. I feel like I've calmed down more about all of this....Even though I have to wait a while, I guess it's better to afford a horse after you get out of college than struggle financially with one in college. As much as I love them and want the horsey life I can wait. Besides, my mom is looking to get me into riding lessons, which makes me really happy!
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