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New Boarders, Rant

This is a discussion on New Boarders, Rant within the Horse Talk forums, part of the Keeping and Caring for Horses category

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        02-05-2013, 04:24 PM
    I'm anti-social. I pretend to be super nice, but any little thing that happens that bothers me I just bottle it up and let it stew! (or come on here and do a loooong rant about it!) I like my own space, but if I have to put up with people, then I do... Hopefully it'll all be fine (and hopefully you don't get irritated by the smallest of things like me, boy am I grumpy, but nice as pie to their faces - passive aggressive? All too likely...)
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        02-05-2013, 05:58 PM
    If you go into it looking for "bad" most likely you will find it. Noone is perfect, after all.
        02-05-2013, 07:40 PM
    What is your BO's "policy" (be it written or simply value-driven) on barn drama? Is she trustworthy to remain true to her word regarding the sort of people she will and will-not do business with?

    I ask because if the BO is a committed "low-drama" type, my guess is they would not have taken on these new boarders without some references indicating the boarders are of the same or similar ilk. Even if no references were obtained, you seem to care for your BO & the environment there quite a lot. Given this, I can loosely extrapolate she is similar to you in terms of what sort of things are important in her direct environment.

    My guess? These folks could be very nice people and prove to be a welcome addition to your time at the barn. They may still not have the best morality in the world when it comes to "borrowing" your things without asking. Unfortunately, stealing seems to be almost the norm these's unbelievable, but that's another thread! If you value your possessions as most do and should (these items are not cheap!), I absolutely agree with those saying to put what you can into a heavy tack trunk and padlock it BEFORE they notice this is "new" & choose to be offended (even though they, too, likely have their items locked up! People are so funny!!).

    I would absolutely be kind and friendly, helping them to acclimate, just as you might want for yourself from others at a new boarding facility...suss them out. Always stay true to your own personal sense of treating people (i.e. As you feel is appropriate), & give additional kindness and warmth to them as you learn whether they are deserving of such. If they turn out not to be, well, you've been cordial and pleasant, and you can go on being you, and only interact with them when necessary....

    Certainly I suggest to hope for the best but prepare for the worst, and do not show too much of your "hand" until they have earned you're sharing of belongings, extra kindnesses (feeding for then if they take a weekend away, etc...) & you'll know when the time is right, of ever, to let down any walls! I certainly hope it works out well, and I'm opting to assume it could be an opportunity to make some nice, new horse-y friends! :0)
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        02-06-2013, 01:13 AM
    Originally Posted by HollyLolly    
    I'm anti-social. I pretend to be super nice, but any little thing that happens that bothers me I just bottle it up and let it stew! (or come on here and do a loooong rant about it!) I like my own space, but if I have to put up with people, then I do... Hopefully it'll all be fine (and hopefully you don't get irritated by the smallest of things like me, boy am I grumpy, but nice as pie to their faces - passive aggressive? All too likely...)
    I wouldn't say I am "anti-social" but have been told I'm a intravert LOL same thing I think!
    We have a small acreage, I have four of my own horses and now only one boarded here....used to have another one but sent her on her merry little way when she caused problems with the other boarder and us.
    Our boarder has been here 6 or 7 yrs. Now, we get along great.....we trail ride together alot and with other neighbors that have horses around here. We also trailer the horses out for day trips/camping trips.....
    It may work out great for the OP making new/great friends with something in common!
    HollyLolly likes this.
        02-06-2013, 02:56 AM
    FnB, if it were possible to see how many posts I have liked and who they belong to, I think you would have the majority of mine. I usually agree with everything you say.

    However, not so much in this situation. Wetrain is at a barn she is happy with. Boarders do tend to bring issues to a place, and when you are comfortable somewhere as the only boarder, I can see that you would be a bit unsure about new people coming in.

    I do think that her fear might be unplaced, and the people might be awesome, but they might not just as fast. It's an unknown and that can be rough when you are comfortable somewhere that's awesome.
        02-06-2013, 06:45 AM
    I would agree that boarders do add issues, but really not so much in a small private place. OP is the ONLY boarder at present, and I am sure the newbies know this. It would be pretty obvious if all of a sudden stuff starts disappearing after they arrive, and they would have to be beyond stupid to make drama given that they are the only "unknowns". The only time I have had issues were at large barns, particularly with many teens. Small adult barns-usually not an issue. JMHO. And I have nothing against teens, I was one once. But I just prefer not to board where there are LOTS of them.
        02-06-2013, 08:49 AM
    I guess we'll just have to wait and see how it goes. I'm going to talk to the BO this weekend when I'm there and get a little more information on who is coming. (I just got a text that two new boarders were coming mid Feb). I plan on re-labeling everything and taking pictures of all that is there. If something goes bad, I know I can always put my belongings in one of the back rooms on top of the garage (its locked). They have already offered that room to me when I first moved in.

    I am very happy where I am and would HATE to move. The BOs are very accommodating to my needs and go above and beyond what I would ever expect them to do. But like I said, its a give and take relationship.
    AlexS and Thunderspark like this.
        02-06-2013, 05:05 PM
    I think it's unlikely that your BO will want drama there too. She probably shares your concerns about bringing new people in.

    I bet if there are any problems, your BO will squash them quickly.

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